by
Black Girl With Long Hair
By Lurie Daniel Favors of Afro State of Mind
Sometimes, despite our intentions, our hair plans simply…fail. We get a great idea and maybe we jump in head first without really thinking about how to make that idea actually work.
That can happen when you make the initial decision to go natural too. A lot of women think that they can just grow their hair out and voila—a beautiful head of natural hair, twist outs and fierce Afros will follow. Little do these unsuspecting sisters know that transitioning from chemically straightened hair to natural hair is indeed a process.
This seems to be the road that one woman went down when she tried to go natural—and simply couldn’t make the transition. As reported over at Clutch Magazine, this sister wanted to go natural and began growing out her roots, but due to a variety of missteps, she was ultimately unsuccessful. She confessed:
I got the bright idea to go natural so I could run, practice yoga and take swimming lessons without scrambling to restyle my hair afterward. I grew obsessed with the wild, coiled, spiky look. Never mind I hadn’t shampooed, rolled or flat ironed my own hair in over 12 years or I only had a mere two inches of new growth attached to inches of bone straightness. I could still achieve a full ‘fro with the right product, Nikki Walton’s “Better Than Good Hair” and step-by-step instructions on a few YouTube videos, right? Wrong.
I was naïve about transitioning. Having been dependent on relaxers for nearly 25 years, I knew nothing about my natural hair other than it was coarse, itchy and lacked body when it was time for a touch-up. And despite the line of demarcation warnings, I still thought all that grease and water would prevent my thick strands from snapping.
Now when the article first posted the author took a lot of heat and some folks were super critical of her inability to transition. But I for one really appreciated her honesty. Especially since as I describe here, after I Big Chopped, I too gave into my own insecurities and slapped a texturizer on my head. Le sigh…
Listen, for those of us who started combing our hair after our mothers let us get perms, there is simply no reason to think we will know what the heck we are doing without some serious help.
If you’re thinking about going natural I strongly encourage you to do your homework first. Don’t just get addicted to hair porn and watch youtube videos of women who have a certain “type” of natural. When you’re just starting out you may have no idea what kind of texture you have so you need to be open to a variety of possibilities.
You have to be willing to get to know your hair. Are your coils kinky? Are they a loose curl? What is your curl pattern? What are the uniquely awesome things that your hair can do? For women who have a history of completely turning their hair care over to someone else, this can be a scary process. But getting familiar with your own head of hair really is part of the “going natural” process.
That said, you should also locate a professional natural hair stylist—someone who is familiar with helping women transition from one type of hair to another. This is especially true if you are someone, like the woman in that article, who typically outsources your hair care.
If managing your chemically straightened hair was not something you took care of on your own, it can be a major shift to jump in and care for your hair through the transition process. There are a number of styles that are useful when you have two different types of hair on your head (i.e. natural roots and straight ends) and you need to know how to achieve looks that will let you be comfortable with your process. A professional can help you navigate this transition.
Finally, try to figure out why it is you want to go natural in the first place. Everyone doesn’t have a “going back to the Motherland” experience when they cut out their perm. But by choosing to embrace the hair that grows out of your head in this society you may find that you need to unlearn some of the values that you had while wearing straight hair.
For example—finding the beauty in natural hair can be a challenge when you’ve spent two or three decades lusting after long, flowing, straight hair. Learning how to appreciate the unique awesomeness of kinky hair can be a bit difficult when you were raised to avoid nappiness like the plague. Unless you challenge those beliefs, chances are you may find transitioning to be a much harder process to get through.
The good news is that if you prepare properly, tap into a support group (whether online or in real life), and most importantly, educateyourself, you greatly increase your chances of a successful transition.
Either way—it is important to remember that loving yourself is one of the first keys to success. How about you? What was your transitioning process like? Were there tips that worked for you or advice that was a waste of time? Sound off in the comments.
For more of Lurie’s writing, check out her book “Afro State of Mind: Memories of a Nappy Headed Black Girl. You can also find her on Twitter, Facebook and YouTube.
50 Responses
Great article! Planning is key….
Growing up, worrying about my hair was not important. Ever since I was 4 years old my Mom used perms on my head and I was used to easily pulling my hair back in a neat ponytail or a bun or if I felt like it, wearing it down with a little curl. I am at an age now that I want my hair to look nice but now that I have my son and my husband, I don’t have time to do a lot to it & it is still not a huge priority. I have been perm-free for a year and three months with the hopes that my natural hair would have some kind of natural curl so that I could wash it, condition it and be done with it. However, my slightly wavy hair when dried, raises roughly two inches above my scalp and I don’t care for the look without some kind of head band in the front to keep it down.
I am doing research currently on how to take care of my hair. I started reading The Science of Black Hair. So far, I am not done, but I have learned a lot. I have never planned or carried out any type of hair care regimen to have healthy hair- permed or natural. So, once I tend to my hair needs, I am hoping that I will be able to style it more easily- which is also another issue because, though I have practiced braiding my hair, I am not good at it and the curly or wavy patterns that I try to get in my hair never turn out. So, for now, I am still slicking my now voluminous puff of hair back into a bun everyday with Eco styling gel until I can figure something else out.
Indeed, one’s natural hair journey can be a bumpy road. There are a lot of challenges but like we always say, weather the storm and the payoff will be huge. We’ve seen, heard, and read a lot of of feel-good stories about journeying naturalistas (http://www.naturalhaircarenews.com/category/readers-spotlight/) and most of them shared that the toughest of challenges are mostly met at the start. So for those who are about to embark on the journey, be patient for we are sure the payoff will be amazing.
For me what worked was I never did the big chop. I know, I know how can I be a natural if I never did it? To be honest, one day I think maybe my senior year in high school I said, “I don’t need another perm” my mom and sister have been saying for years that I did need one, but what’s good for the goose is good for the gander, or so I thought. My mom put one in her hair, my sister’s hair and I didn’t want to be left out. But I’m neglecting the fact that they were and still are very tender-headed. So their decision was made out of not wanting to experience pain, which I understand. Back to the point, I just let my hair grow, until I noticed just the other day the only perm left in my hair are the thin ends, I need to trim any way. Just finally realizing, my hair is curly, no amount of perking, and flat Ironing will change it because when I sweat, which I do at work and at the gym, my curls start to show and I’m not per ming my hair everytime I perspire. The Maine reason I didn’t do the big chop, was because unlike my mom and sister my didn’t just grow at a rapid rate. My hair has always been shorter than theirs and as my mom put it, “a curly mess on my head” so for vanity I kept the hair just for length. While my roots were thick, and never laid down unless I hit with a blow dryer, every morning, the rest was poofy, frizzy with semi straightened curls. *sighs when I first decided it seemed there weren’t many products for my hair, let’s face it in Seattle, there aren’t many products in store for my straightend hair either. But online were home made recipies, for shampoo, conditioners and it was truly a blessing, other wise my hair would be a nasty, lop sided, curly afro, begging to be loved.
Honestly I think the best thing (for me and maybe others who are transitioning) is to do a slow transition with out a such BIG chop. Two reasons, one is because if you are used to long hair that you can do all the bun styles you are used to… And two, you literally start to HATE your permed ends. When you start to feel your thick, healthy, softer, natural hair (and this may take like a year or so in transitioning) you start to curse your permed ends and get to the point where the thought of you going back to perming kinda sickens you a bit lol… (For me, the best way to get to a year for transitioning sew-ins, braids, and buns, strawsets, and wigs in between) now my reasons for going natural is not that glamorous as some (getting back to the roots, learning to love my natural hair)… The glamorous reasons do help the cause but, my real reason is… I’m lazy… And I am tired of the perming process… Look for about two weeks you have to prepare, take out your hair if it is in a style, find a style that you can keep your hands off your hair so that you doing irritate your scalp and for the love of god don’t scratch (unless you want to deal with scabs)… You have to remember the last time you permed your hair… Just too much for me… Once you learn how to deal with your hair it’s so much simpler that you wonder why you did not do this earlier… Not to say simple does not mean hard work is not required because it is hard work… It takes me about two days to do my hair for washing (working time is getting shorter), but to compare the two I love dealing with my natural hair more than getting perms… And it took me to feel how healthy my natural hair is, and hating my permed ends to realize I can never go back… And if I woke up one day and all my hair was permed and straight, I would kill the person who did it… Kill them…
Nerver grows,natural yes stays,same lenght i hate it
My hair been short for years pretty but nerver grows therefore its ugly 3inch in lenght no matter what i do
This is my 3rd time attempting to transition and I can admit it’s a hell of a process! The first 2 times I gave in because I’ve never came in contact with the “real me” and honestly it just made me so uncomfortable I went and bought a relaxer. And that was the issue the reason I decided that my last perm was my last perm. I lossed so much hair due to relaxers I could cry. My hair was thin and lifeless & made me feel so ugly! But I noticed that once the relaxer began to fade I gained so much body and my little kinks, waves or whatever I have were beautiful. I can admit I’m not comfortable in my skin because I don’t believe I’ve found “Me” yet! Who knows the natural me just might be that girl! & if not I can always go back to relaxed!
Okay so your saying they dont know their natural hair but at the beginning they had it for years or did they perm it when they were 1? And i straightened my hair only i know my hair and yeah its not easy 2 handle but you can do it and my hair was 2 my hips before i cut it (because of the annoying brushing trough story) now its shoulder length in curly and i like it and yeah you shouldnt shampoo it that much and you cant brush it you should comb it blabla but why why should we destroy what god has given us? 2 feel pretty? Your pretty with what god has given you but okay go ahead try to be white straighten and perm your hair until it falls out and never grows back because it doesnt only hurt your hair it also hurts your scalp which makes the hair grow thanks for reading 🙂
Trying to be white by relaxing their hair may have been true in the past. Now, it’s about style and lifestyle. Many don’t have the physical ability to work with hair of a certain texture. You can’t compare the work required with 4a hair to 4c hair.
As far as white and straight hair–many whites have curly hair, some similar to ours. Why not say trying to be Asian. They have straight hair too.
I could not agree with this article more. I decided to go natural after getting a relaxer on a short cut and it fell out! The only hair I had left was new growth, so the transition was easy for me. However, learning about my own hair vs. trying to make mine look like everyone’s on youtube took about 2 years. Once I learned what my hair could do and embracing the beauty of kinky hair, it’s been smooth sailing after that. I think one huge part of having natural hair is that you can’t be lazy. Laziness has tripped me up a few times. Instead of taking great care of my hair, I would just keep it up for weeks at a time. So I would end up cutting my hair b/c it was so damaged. Have patience, don’t be lazy and do what works for you!
hello I’m really thinking about going natural but Im scared I have shoulder length thick hair even with a perm I actually dont perm my hair too often because I burn (I have really itchy scalp) but I dont want to do the big chop I love my long hair I hate to even get my ends trimmed only because the Dominicans cut more then they should..I just really would like to know the best way I can try and transition without doing a BC also I like having straight hair what about flat irons?
Lots of people doing the slow transition without a Bc. Go to curlynikki.com for tips. Check out the forum.
Rollersets? No heat but time consuming
I’m one of the women who didn’t plan. And I ended up with a hot mess on my head. I had breakage at the line of demarcation. I had straight ends in some parts, and no ends in the other(new hair grew after I stopped relaxing). Turned out I had two different hair textures: 4a and 4c. Those two textures prevented me from getting a decent hairstyle. I like the kinky-coily look of 4c. I like the wavy, curly look of 4a. My hair needed to pick one of them and stick to it. But that’s impossible, isn’t it? So my head looked like a before and before picture with straight ends.
Now I’m texturized. Not perfect, but at least consistent.
We’re in a very different sseaon than most individuals our age (42 and soon to be 40). We joined our family of five with my parents due to my daddy’s health in 2005. In 06, his health declined so much that I stepped down from the staff position I had at another ministry in order to be his primary caregiver. Hubby was the night caregiver. He passed on in Nov 06 and in March of 07 – my mother decided to start dating. She’s 65. She has a steady boyfriend who is also a part of our church. I’m on staff – hubby is an intern while still finishing seminary. Our oldest son (16) is a part of the technology team. My parents were already heavily involved where we’re at. It was just a given we would be as well since we did and still do almost all the driving. Life is definitely an adventure!
Thank you for this article. I started to transition from relaxed hair to natural hair and lasted about eight months. At that point I decided to texturize my hair. I made the decision because my hair was breaking off and the time that it took to take care of my hair was not working for me. Since I texturized, my hair is healthy, not breaking as before and I’m loving it. I did learn a lot about hair during my transition and I’m so happy I did it. I learned that moisturizing, conditioning, protein and protective styling is important and I still use the same processes although I am now texturized.
My problem is that articles like this seem to associate self-worth and curl pattern, as if I need to learn to love my curly, nappy hair. I love me and my hair, regardless of texture. I don’t like it when the hair community turns naturals against relaxed. We should all promote being beautiful with healthy hair, straight or curly.
I may or may not transition to natural again, what’s most important is my hair is healthy and I feel good about it.
Love this article! I did the big chop on mid July 2010. Everything was going swell until i’d became prego with my second daughter. I was almost 2 yrs in and being pregnant while taking care of my 2 1/2 yrs old was a challenge! Not to mention the crazy hormones lol. So…, I’ve went back hp the creamy crack, but this time, instead of perming bone straight, i ‘d texlaxed. It left me with lots of texture but chemical is still chemical! The damage was already done. Now I am transitioning and I am determined to see it thru. I am really excited.
Ps
This pic was taken before my texlaxed. I really miss my natural hair
[img]https://bglh-marketplace.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/Image68.jpg[/img]
Thanks for this article. M
Great article! Patience, patience, patience. At least, that’s what I keep telling myself as I look at my natural coif each morning. I have been “natural” for almost two years. Natural parenthetically because I was a closet natural-hiding underneath weaves, braids, wigs. Last week, I finally took out my weave, youtubed videos on twist outs, pinged a few friends for tips. The finished product-awful! My hair was hard, tangled. It was quite frustrating. Needless to say, I made an appt with my stylist and am now rocking a blowout. This weekend, I will try the twist out again. Patience, patience, patience. I may have to make a special trip to see the Hair Whisperer! Great article!
I big chopped last Tuesday because my transition phase was a disaster after 7 months I couldn’t do it anymore! My hair started to tangle and I was just stressed… So now I’m sitting with this head of hair that idk what to do with… I have this coily hair that from looking and researching seems to be 4a hair but idk how to define my curls or retain moisture or anything it’s just sooo frustrating… Does anybody have any advice?!
Get a nice spray bottle that mists your hair in a way youre comfortable with
Research çold water apple cider vineagar rinse (I add Lavender essential oil)
Add small amounts of glycerin to whatever you moisturize your hair with
Drink at least 1.5 liters of water over rhe course of a day
Leave your hair open whilst showering
Those were. Game changers for me
It took me three years of researching and tryig to go natural three times before I actually did it. I started doing my own relaxed hair in middle school so I was use to caring for my hair. But I didn’t know how to care for natural hair. Pony tails, roller sets, and doobie wraps just weren’t working and everything else considered natural or transisitioning styles were major fails lol. So I transitioned with pressed hair. My aunt could press some natural hair so straight, that I would rock it for two or three weeks, no heat in between. So much so, when I cut off my relaxer after a year of transitioning, everyone was like, “you had that much curly hair under there the whole time?!” I couldn’t believe it myself. All the while, I was watching natural hair videos, asking my natural friends questions, and trying to embrace a new mindset about hair and nappiness 🙂 Once I cut it, it was still a struggle, but I worked it out. Now my hair has grown longer than when my hair was relaxed after a year natural and 2 years of growth. So everyone’s process is different, you have to be patient, and accept YOUR UNIQUE process!
I agree with everything you mentioned in your writing Lurie. Many people just jump on the bandwagon without doing their researh, others do it for the fad. it’s important to educate oneself about natural hair before making up your mind and jumping in.
This is why I advocate for women to be in contorl of their hair on my blog. only you can dedice the course your hair takes.
themanecaptain.blogspot.ca
Thank you!
I never really liked straight hair. Actually I got a relaxer by accident and just stuck with it (but that’s another story). I was always changing-and damaging-my hair to find something crazy and unique that matches my style and personality.Since I was always told that nappy hair was unacceptable going natural was always out of the question. After all the haircuts and hair dyes I got to keep my individuality (this was when everyone was getting the Rihanna cut…and for the record I GOT THAT HAIRCUT BEFORE SHE DID) I decided to shave it all off and get a texturizer..I didnt know anything about going natural or the big chop or that this community even existed (I didn’t know about Amber Rose either). It wasn’t until someone asked me if I planned to grow out my fro that I considered that this look might actually work for me. The problem was I continued with my old habits and it took me a while to realize I wasnt about that perm life anymore. 3 years later-2 years without a texturizer-my hair is crazy and unique and HEALTHY and my confidence has never been higher. I might sound crazy saying this but learning about my hair has brought us closer together :)My hair is like my fingerprint and I could never go back. *shout out to my fro I love you girl*
Great article.
I first transition to natural from 2006-2007. But after a illness, not really knowing what I was doing (this was before the internet exploded with info) and having to go back to work. I did not have the patience. I hated that I did that but in fall 2009 I finally did my homework as much as possible before had and sucessfully transition by Big Chop in spring 2010 (8 months).
So I would advise to research a lot before you start the transition. Nowadays there is plenty of information to help you understand the process.
I liked this article. Tried to go natural in 2010 that lasted for 9 months and I got a relaxer in 2011 and regretted it before I even left the salon. Then I tried transitioning again and got talked into textlaxing last year again regretted. My problem is finding a “natural” stylist. Most beauticians where I live just don’t want to do natural hair and will talk u out of it. And I have gone african American Caribbean and Dominican all are the same. They don’t seem to understand so I alternate between braids, wigs and half-wigs. If anyone knows of a “natural” stylist in nassau county in ny who will not try and talk me out of being natural or try and charge me an arm and a leg please post
You may have to try to go the city to find a stylist. There are tons of natural salons in BK. I usually trek there from the BX when I want to get my hair professionally styled.
Yes I know some of the best natural stylist are in brooklyn. I was hoping that there would be some in my area or at least in Queens which is still close to me, but if I have to go to BK then I might just do that. I would never go to a stylist in Manhattan because Im not going to give one of my kidneys just to get my hair done. Its sad that one has to go to such great lengths.
I’m not sure about Nassau county but I swear by my stylist in Brooklyn. One thing to remember is that many stylists who are of African descent are still trained to achieve a straight hair look. And one of the things I discuss in my book is my experiences w/ natural hair while living in the Dominican Republic. Generally speaking, a Dominican stylist (unless she/he is breaking from the mold) is not going to be able to help you go natural. Culturally speaking the training they receive is much like the training many traditional Black American stylists receive, i.e. “STRAIGHT IS THE GOAL!”
I’m more than willing to share my stylists info. Her name is Adenike (though we call her the Natural Hair Whisperer, LOL) and she is PHENOMENAL. Her number is 347.251.1212 and she is at a salon in Brooklyn. Feel free to tell her I recommended her – she will take great care of you!
Hmmm the “Natural Hair Whisperer” sounds intriguing. LOL Thank you for sharing. Most women don’t like to share ;-). Yeeesssss I guess Im gonna have to go to BKLYN
OMG!!! Miss Lurie !!! I don’t know why I didn’t click on your links at the bottom of the article. I’ve seen your videos on youtube before. You were one of the few women that I followed in the beginning…..DUH!!! I guess Ima goin to Brooklyn!!!!! LOL!!!!
Ha! Glad to make the connection Doz!
I love this article. The story quoted inside this article sounds just like me. I “outsourced” my hair care (hot comb by my mom flat ironed regularly at the salon) for 23 years. Recently though I HAD to go natural and unfortunately I had a lot of breakage where the new growth and flat ironed ends met – that made me cry more than you know. Finally, after cutting my hair twice (the straight ends) and after eight months or so I love my natural hair because I just recently learned how to keep it moisturized and also learned what works best for my hair type. If it weren’t for my baby sis and some YouTube videos who knows where I would be.
So thank you for writing this article because it is truly needed!
Liz,
I’m so glad you liked this piece! It makes my little blogger heart feel good, LOL.
Tori, Ill gladly discuss as transitioned from pressed hair. Um I think the biggest issue here is that your hair maybe heat damaged. Just because your hair reverts back after washing doesn’t mean that its all good. My hair always reverted with no problems. No straight pieces or anything BUT it was damaged none the less. For example if I tried to press my hair n roll it, it wouldn’t hold a curl. If I combed my hair I would get massive shedding and breakage. Also it was chronically dry. Nothing worked. Like you I tried to in the beginning just put some product on n do a twist out. My hair still wouldn’t hold the pattern. I think thermal heat over the years slowly breakdown the protein bonds to a point where the elasticity of my hair sucked, it would not stay moisturized and wouldn’t hold curls. I simply chopped off a lot and started over. Once I did that things got a lot better.If your hair is anything like mine was you may have to get a hair cut. Also be aware that it takes time to get use to your hair unstraightened. Your products may need to change as you are no longer wanted to repel water to keep it straight. What desired results are you looking for if I might ask?
I appreciate this piece quite a lot. But, I notice when there’s discussion of going natural, it always begins with hair that is relaxed chemically. I wear my hair straight, but I press.
Despite the fact I stopped perming four years ago, I am still not capable of just washing my hair, letting it air dry or applying products for curly hair to get the desired results. It seems like nobody really discusses what to do with hair that is accustomed to thermal styling.
It would be really nice to have a piece similar to this one from someone who’s shared my same experience.
Hi Tori!
I totally understand where you are coming from, and it is the driving force behind my blog The Mane Objective. I hadn’t had a perm since I was about 6 years old, but I did substantial damage to my hair via flat irons. Check out my blog, http://www.maneobjective.com and Instagram @maneobjective. I post tips and information regularly for those transitioning specifically from heat damaged hair.Hope you find some info that helps:)
I haven’t had a relaxer in over a year. I have only been fully natural since December of last year. After about five months of transitioning I had had enough. I had watched a ton of YouTube videos so I just knew I could do my own big chop. I was wrong. When I was done my hair was so uneven. I had to go to a barber the next day to get my twa shaped. I also did not know for sure what my hair type was until after my big chop. I have type 4 hair…a,b, and c. My hair has different textures in different areas. Before I big chopped I thought I could just do wash and gos when I went natural until my hair grew out a little. I was so wrong. Wash and gos do NOT work for my type 4 hair. It turns into a hot tangled and shrunken MESS. My relaxed hair was fine with gel. My natural hair not so much. I also went through a phase where I was buying every product I read about. I was looking for my staple products. I was trying to figure out what my hair did and did not like. I have found that my hair likes it when I keep things simple. Now I just co wash, deep condition, spray in my leave in, and twist. I keep it simple. Going natural or returning to your hair’s natural state is indeed a process and you may go through. Trial and error phase before you discover what works for you. Just be patient. Eventually you will figure it all out.
I think the biggest problem that women can have in going natural is wanting someone else’s hair. If you are overbuying hair products, overmanipulating, and trying everything to make your curls look different than they are, you will be frustrated and probably damaging your hair. Natural is about acceptance of yourself as you are. What comes out of your head, as it comes out of your head, is what you should be learning to take care of. I think too many naturals fell in love with the idea of 3C curls and ended up being 4B when they big chopped and are still chasing that look they fell in love with.
Candice, this comment right here nails it for me: “Natural is about acceptance of yourself as you are. What comes out of your head, as it comes out of your head, is what you should be learning to take care of. I think too many naturals fell in love with the idea of 3C curls and ended up being 4B when they big chopped and are still chasing that look they fell in love with.”
Nuff said!
I love this article! I wish that all women had a chance to read this before making the decision to rock their natural locks! My 15 yr old is transitioning now and at first all she did was whine and give excuse after excuse. I told her that once she got a job and could afford her own hair regime ( sew ins and perms) then she could do what she wanted but until then, and as long as my dimes are spent, she was going to learn to appreciate and maintain what grew out of her scalp. Ultimately it was about the effort she had to put into her
hair; suffice to say she managed and is now a happy transitioner. Being natural not only changes your outer appearance, it is a LIFE change; a spiritual one and I’m thankful for the movement 🙂
Erin, So glad you liked my article! Now that I am expecting a little girl I will be sure to remember your comment. I’m hoping my daughter will be able to by-pass some of the hair issues so many of us have – but if not then I’ll do my best to follow in your footsteps and help her see the beauty in what God gave her.
If I was straightened and read this article I would be so intimidated. haha
I transitioned with braids. Grow and snip straight ends as you go. Might take a 6 months to year. Simple. Or just BC and rock a short haircut for a while.
Pretty much everything I know about my hair I learned on Youtube and Blogs.
My #1 advice is don’t expect your hair to look like a natural hair guru’s! They make amazing styles look effortless and easy but it might not turn out that way for you.
When this happens you will be tempted to sob on the floor and feel like you’ve failed or made a huge mistake by thinking you can go natural. But you haven’t. You just need to learn more about your hair and adjust your expectations to suit. You’ll learn what you hair can and cannot do as you go along!
When I decided to go natural, I went straight to braids (extensions). I did my own extensions for almost 2 years. After the first year, I did an assessment of my hair and I cut of all the straightened hair, but I wasn’t comfortable with my hair then so I put it back in braids. I did this for the next year or so until I couldn’t stand wearing extensions anymore. I started doing alot of research on products and would test some of them on a small patch of hair to the back of my head by the nape. I did this I think for months on end, looking at the results. Then I found what worked for me and I took out the extensions and never looked back. Trust me the first few months were alot of drama, especially since my hair was also getting used to being out and not braided. I just say even though you may go through many a bad hair day in the beginning, stick with it and you will eventually find what works for you.
I have nothing against relaxed hair by the way but I just realized I have zero discipline to give relaxed hair the kind of maintenance it needs. And yes I know natural hair can also be high maintenance but for some reason I just find it easier to work with my natural hair texture.
Great article and great point :
“For example—finding the beauty in natural hair can be a challenge when you’ve spent two or three decades lusting after long, flowing, straight hair. Learning how to appreciate the unique awesomeness of kinky hair can be a bit difficult when you were raised to avoid nappiness like the plague. ”
To me that’s the most difficult.
But really, once you followed all of those advices… I think you can finally have a great journey. Not a flawless one but a good one without any doubt.
Annnsow – glad you liked the article! Truly I agree that this is one of the most difficult parts: learning to replace the values we had when we had straight hair and replacing them w/ a new value system that can appreciate kinky/coily/nappy hair. Especially when the world we live in makes loving natural hair an oddity instead of the norm. But I believe that as more of us who go down this road we are changing that standard and making it easier for those who come after us. Think of us as part of the pioneers who create a new standard for the little Black girls who will be next in line. 🙂
This is an excellent Caveat! Read, Research, and Ask question!!! Fortunately, we have soooo much more information on transitioning , and living the natural hair lifestyle. I wish I had know about the L.O.C. Method when I first started my journey! The frustration I endured from countless big chop resets. I had no idea about PH balance, moisture protein balance and the dangers of HEAT and Dyes! So Everyone who is about to take this journey, Read , research and learn about how to do your hair.
Thank you Dabney! I couldn’t agree more – there’s a reason why they say “Knowledge is power” after all! Glad you liked the article. 🙂