by
Black Girl With Long Hair
By Sabrina of Seriously Natural
Seasoned naturals do not know everything. No, we don’t. I bring this up because a couple of days ago on Facebook a poster was going OFF on natural hair bloggers, vloggers, and Youtubers for acting like they have all the answers on natural hair. They were labeled as hypocrites. I had to think about her statements a little deeper because I really wanted to grasp her anger. Where was this coming from? And why were so many agreeing with her post?
I’ve never really shared too deeply about my natural hair journey. I’ve mentioned it and discussed some portions but I never delved into the unsure Sabrina that was lurking around before and during the beginning. I permed my hair for the last time in August 2005 right before Hurricane Katrina tore into the Gulf Coast. Afterward, we found ourselves temporarily homeless so we moved our little family to Colorado. I went from a humid climate to a rather dry one, and although I had serious stress during that time in my life I still found time to be worried about my hair. I didn’t want it to fall out so I ditched the perming and decided to go natural.
I wasn’t a “here I am, I’m a natural woman!!” back then. Back then I was sporting braids and wigs and covering my tresses 100% of the time. I did that for about three years always wanting to go all naturale but not mentally ready. Yes, back then there weren’t that many of us and yes, I was self-conscious, unsure…just really not ready to expose myself to the world.
My husband and sister told me to just do it already and even explained that my hair looked nice. Despite their insistence whenever I did take a break from the braids and wigs and stepped outside of my comfort zone (my house) I made sure to cover my tresses. Was I a chicken? Sure, but I had no knowledge on how to take care of my hair and what products to use.
I had done a big chop even though it had no name back then and had ultra short hair. I found some curl hydration crap on a shelf in Target and slathered it in my hair while sporting a scarf as a headband. Then on one frightful day in October of 2008 I bore my hair and my soul to the world. Luckily, the world was inviting. I walked into work and I was showered with “ahs” and “oohs” by mostly white co-workers. Even the meanest of the meanest supervisors smiled a genuine smile and told me she loved my hair. It was the reaction I so needed.
I needed the love, the like, the acceptance. I was unsure, insecure, and afraid. Yes, seasoned naturals had or HAVE doubts, fears, and failures, but those failures have led us to successes and valuable knowledge on what to do and how to do it. Do we know everything there is to know about natural hair? Hell no, but we have been where you are right now and have learned how to overcome the obstacles that some may be facing. It was HARD to be natural when there weren’t many around to gain support, knowledge and acceptance. So yes, that does make us a little rough around the edges but the love is still there.
I’m not making excuses for the rudeness, the shortness or the nastiness that some receive from seasoned naturals. I’m giving my take on what it was like for me and why some may be unwilling to share that dark past. There may be a lasting hurt and insecurity from when being natural wasn’t so accepted. It may be hard for some to admit they were afraid or worried about how they looked or even that they felt alone. It’s not always easy to look into your soul and admit you were unsure about a natural path you feel so strongly about now.
So, what is my point? My point is many of us have been where you are today and if some are ugly about it then just brush it off and take it in stride. We aren’t ALL like that and I guarantee you will find many to help you and understand your plight. I envy your chance to go natural when there are tons of products, advice and support to guide you. Am I bitter? Not at all because I am the confident natural I am today because I was the clueless natural eight years ago. My past is my past and it makes me stronger everyday. So the best advice I can give to those feeling anger from some seasoned naturals:
Ignore the hate, embrace the love and enjoy the journey.
Ladies, have you ever gotten the side eye from women who went natural before it was popular? And if you’re a seasoned natural, does the increasing popularity of the natural hair movement bother you? Why or why not?
Sabrina is the author of Seriously Natural.
147 Responses
Who cares! I’m just glad we are embracing our natural hair and now my daughter can grow up and feel confident about her big beautiful hair!
I went natural before it was popular on my college campus, but It’s current popularity doesn’t bother me, what bothers me is that a lot of people are going natural but allowing their hair to look like who did it abs what for, as if you don’t have to put in effort to care for natural hair
WE WERE ALL NATURAL BEFORE IT WAS POPULAR! Because, at some point, WE DID NOT HAVE A RELAXER!
I spent my childhood and early teenage years natural. I knew all the styles, treatments, etc. Since I was about 15 I began relaxing my hair through the salon and it looked great. My hair didn’t go through the break odds and extreme damge because I never neglected the treatment of my hair. I still knew how to keep it healthy while relaxed.
I don’t like being judged by new naturalists as if I no nothing about my hair just because it’s relaxed.
If the new naturalist had decided to learn about their hair care when they were getting their hair relaxed, they wouldn’t have had jacked up relaxed hair.
I read this blog because I still use and learn the hair techniques and treatments, even though my hair is relaxed and will probably will be for most of my life.
So this is why some of us get offended, but we should all continue to study about the health of our hair regardless of what we decide to do with it.
I’ve been natural all of my life and I do not have a problem with the natural movement if people are serious about it.I’m not opposed to perms “to each their own”.I just have problem with people jumping on the band wagon just because it is a trend to them.I’m not saying It is anything wrong with trying it out but don’t go along with it because someone told you to.It is very hard and time consuming I can say that and I’m still learning and thats why some people still have their issues with going natural or maintaining it.I just don’t like when people have been natural for a couple of years and think they know everything about it.I’ve been natural all my life and Im still trying to figure it out.Some people have their own maintenance routine I don’t enjoy anyone telling me mines is wrong when they have just started.
Why do you even care?
I have been natural for about 12 years. I told myself that I needed to learn to love and appreciate my natural hair. Once I did that, I could go back to straightening it if I found the maintenance preferable. Admittedly, I wore styles that covered my natural hair for much of the time. I loved low maintenance braids and twists.
Up until only several months ago did I eventually decide to get serious about wearing my hair lose and learning how to care for it. It is evident to me that I am still not fully confident with my natural hair. I cover now for religious reasons, but I realize that when I have worn my hair out, no matter how I wore it (blown out and clipped back, pulled back in a puff, a twist out with a headband, or really short and tightly coily/curly, fresh after a wash), people have always seemed to like it. I would be surprised when I would walk out the door, not sure how nice I looked, and would notice some men admiring my hair (I cover now, but it was a confidence booster at the time).
Somehow I struggled to see my hair as others viewed it. I did not know the beauty God gave to me. One day recently I cut my hair really short because I felt it was thing to do. I miss the length, but cutting it has helped me to learn how to care for my hair and scalp (with less hair to manage). I also discovered that the braids stressed my scalp in ways that were not evident with so much hair. I am on my way to healthy hair and a more positive self image.
I encourage all the ladies on their natural hair journey, regardless of when they started. I do not know it all and am still journeying.
Like the author I have been natural for a long time, since 2000, and have had a serious up and down journey. Things that I have done now have a fancy name for it…transition, big chop, dust ends, deep condition and the list goes on. I honestly thought there were very few like me and had to learn some hard lessons by trial and error. I even went as far in 2005 to believing that if I used a texturizer it will wash right out.
The whole Youtube generation has certainly cleared up some misconceptions I had and made me better understand my hair and the types of products out there. However I quickly “forgot” some of the practices which made my journey easier because I got caught up with trying this and that from Youtube. Now that common sense has regained its rightful place I know how to successfully blend new Info to enhance what I already knew, instead of abandoning them altogether. For example I already used to protective style (i called it plaiting my hair now its called protective style lol) now I effectively moisturise and seal the ends and keep it moist throughout.
The end of it all is listen to your hair…what good for the goose not necessarily good for the gander too
i wanted to go natural back in 2000 but i didn’t know much about it and the few women i knew who were naturals either kept their head shaved (which was not an option for me) or they wore locks.personally i thank God for all the bloggers that show the versatility of natural hair and share their knowledge on keeping our hair healthy.
I have been natural since 2001. I had locs for 10 years cut them had braids did the perm thing once for about 3yrs. Grew it out chopped in 2001 other people had a hard time with how my hair looked (girl your hair looks a hot mess) but I never did I’m glad to see so many coming into their natural self feeling confident, and secure. Welcome
I don’t consider myself “seasoned” though I’ve been natural my entire life (never had a relaxer). I honestly love influx of blogs, videos and websites. Just because I’ve always had my natural hair it doesn’t mean I always knew what I was doing!
I did experience a lot of flack about going natural when I thought about it. “Natural isn’t for everybody.” And it really discouraged me from doing so. A lot of mean discouraging remarks about my transistioning just did me in.
I just have to disagree. Natural if for all of whom God created that way. He didn’t make any mistakes.
What grows out of ur scalp is for you!it’s how you choose to flaunt it which isn’t for everbody
fell my bad
Natural hair is a beautiful thing. I’ve been natural 4 5years. A lot of the black women I know weren’t natural and looked at me funny when I did the big chop. I love touching my hair and twisting it. I like walking in the rain and how it feels against my head. The first time I showered and wet my hair, it was a rap. I feel in love with my original hair
Went natural about 17yrs ago but didnt know how to care for my hair until 3yrs ago so thanks to all the naturals that came after me!
Why cant we as ONE in the black community shut up about who the hell was ‘first’ or ‘last’ and just support each other 😉 even if its just for once gosh. You know who is a VETERAN NATURAL ?? my aunts, cousins and grannie from Africa! Did the big chop and evrything!.. ridicilous -_- Now that my frustration has been outed, I can move on 🙂
Dear black sisters. Let’s embrace ourselves and our lovely sisters who have put their energy and time into providing the information needed out there for us to even embrace ourselves MORE. Having hair is a beautiful thing and especially if we can enjoy it. So let’s not fight, but celebrate!
I’m actually happy more people are going natural…No on is looking at me crazy anymore..LOL
I went natural in 1998 (stopped perming) but I pressed my hair a lot. I’ve only now started to take care of my hair.
I say….whatever veteran or not take care of your natural hair.
I have been fully natural since 1999. Big chopped and all. Do I feel that anyone stands on my shoulders because they decided to go natural when natural has become more popular? Absolutely not. This is a personal decision which for many people is not taken likely.
Is there more available now , in terms of resources and products, as compared to when I made my decision? Yes. The irony, however, is that the products I have found which work best on my hair have been around for many, many yrs (natural oils, apple cider vinegar, shea butter). It is just that I was not knowledgeable of how to really nourish my hair.
I give all kinds of support and kudos to anyone who steps out of a comfort zone and tries something brand new. That always requires a bit of courage, no matter how many other people are doing it.
I returned to natural way back in 98′. At the time, my best friend went natural too. Being an actor, I was surrounded with a lot of creative sistahs who were wearing their hair natural too. My mom gave me flack at first, then she grew to like my hair and saw more natural hair women as the years went by.
My only wish is that there were as many products and books that are now. It would have made things easier for me. It was trial and error with my hair.
I am delighted to see so many naturals now.
I feel whether you have been natural 15 years or five months. We need to support one another and show love.
I started my nature after the riots of 1968 and have moved on to dreads 10 years ago. It’s been a beautiful journey!
[img]https://bglh-marketplace.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/JJones0001.jpg[/img]
Who cares??? New natural, old natural, curly natural, nappy natural…at the end of the day….ITS JUST HAIR! DO YOU BOO! I fall in both categories. I went natural in 03 when it was not as popular, and ended up perming because I had no idea what to do with it for a wedding I was attending. I went back natural in 2010, and as many times as I say “if I only know then what I know now”, I’m still loving this journey. I grew up on an island with plenty naturals, and as much as some tried to make it look jazzy, I was not inspired. But I’m sure aint’ none of them mad that I finally saw what they saw way back then. NOW, knowledge is power…so I have my cake (healthy hair) and I’m eating it too (nice looking styles). Can’t we all just get along? If not, get over yourself!
I went natural in 1995, as a teenager, in the “deep south.” My mother was supportive but would have probably been happier if I kept straightening my hair (pressing comb, relaxer, whatever) as the prevailing attitude then was just that–straight, not natural (or “nappy” as most people there called anything not straight). Going to school being the only girl with her hair corn-rowed (not extensions) or in bantu knots was challenging but I made it through the insults and dirty looks from my peers…Sadly though, most of the disapproval came from my fellow black students, and white students usually saw my hair as a “cool” novelty (a la “how do you get your hair like that? it’s sooo cool.”) Now, after 17 or 18 years of being natural, I have mixed feelings about the natural hair movement. Overall, I love that there are more brown and black women embracing varying degrees of natural and healthier lifestyle choices (from hair, to food, to exercise) as it helps reinforce to my young children some of the messages that I promote in our house.
However, there is a little part of me (perhaps the teenage girl in 1995) that feels some kind of way as I now see (via facebook and instagram) some of those same criticizers and name-callers from high school have now taken, or are on the road to natural hair…I know that people can grow and change in life–“be enlightened” –but that little part of me that (eventually became resilient) due to their harsh comments and ridicule, still remembers that pain.
Aside from those seconds when I get stuck in 1995, I love to see that more women are exploring natural hair as an option. I’m not fond of it being referred to as a trend, because I believe that trivializes the commitment and the amount of work that goes into going back to natural hair (transitioning, styling, etc…) and takes some of the significance of “going natural” and what it can mean to a woman as she steps out in a different light to receive the compliments or criticisms of those around her (whether she cares or not, and whether she wants them or not). For me, “trend” lends this movement (those that choose to became natural) to a sort of commercialization and saturation of natural hair care market–an added complexity that just seems unnecessary. As women (and in particular women of color) we have enough to deal with.
Lucky for me that with more time and growing up, I can recognize those brief and fleeting moments of negative pettiness that I sometimes feel over the topic of natural hair, invented technical terms, and who did it first. I continue to strive to be better and embrace ALL women that are striving to be their best and put their best forward–best face, best shoe, or best hairstyle–their BEST self–forward. High school is over,and we all must remember people arrive at different places at the same time, and sometimes people arrive at the same place at different times…
Finding ways to have one up over someone else…. I can’t think of why anyone would have a problem with any of it except for comments about it being a fad…
What does it matter when or why a person went natural? It doesn’t make “veteran naturals” any more insightful.
I guess I’m not understanding the bitterness or the self-scorn. I used to rock TWA’s at various points going back to the 90’s and we’re talking low cut TWA’s, like that group Zhane used to wear. But lots of women chopped their hair off at that point. Like, the first time I did it, I went to the barber’s chair and cut off my hair. And he “laid it out” too! The thing is, when the hair started to grow back, women were told to texturize it so that it looked curly and pretty as it grew in.
I didn’t texturize it. I just went straight back to relaxers. I think I’ve B.C.’d about oh, four times or so. This last time, I did it because I couldn’t afford a relaxer. It’s been five years since I’ve B.C’d. I kept it short for 4.5 years. It’s just this year that I’ve let it grow out, just to see what I could do with all of these new coils and curls.
But really, it’s not an issue of emotional or mental health to me. It’s all about what I felt like doing to my hair, or what I could afford to do with my hair and still look dignified. I really don’t get the pain, the shame, the self-righteousness, the invented drama.
These comments are like listening to old folk say, “Back when I was young, we had to walk ten miles to school in the snow, uphill, downhill, and back again… barefoot!”
Other comments from said “veterans” sound like croons of bitter birds. You didn’t have all the support and info that’s so readily available now. We get it, but don’t try to climb up on the high horse and try to tell the new generation and neo-natural movement they aren’t doing anything special because you did it first. Sometimes they just come off as being envious of the support available now versus the lack thereof they had to deal with. Stop trivializing the natural journey of others because YOU think it’s just a fad. Let it go and get over it already. Just be happy more women are learning to appreciate their own natural hair. Otherwise, have a stadium of seats.
I have spent more time as a natural than a processed head, mainly because my relaxed hair only lasted for two year stretches before it became expensive and broke off. I was natural all through high school in the late 90s. I wasn’t the only one but I was the only 4c. The rest had loose curls that could be slicked back into buns. I was the only one who really had to figure out what to do so I was twisting and individual braiding my hair. Butttt… So what? It didn’t make me a hair expert, there were no products in the late 90s or earliest zeros that could help me to manage my 4c tresses and I went back to processes then natural in time for the early zeros kinky curly/miss Jessie’s explosion. Still didn’t know how to care for my hair or style it. I have only begun to learn styling and therefore proper care, this year.
The thing that helped me was learning flat twisting and cornrowing, this week! It means I may be able to PS well this winter and truly care for my hair.
I feel like hair is an ongoing process and it doesn’t matter if you went natural in 2002, been that way all your life or BCed six months ago. Some of the newest naturals have very healthy, well cared for natural hair and some vets don’t. Both ends of the spectrum can be helpful, preachy or open minded. There’s no prize for being there when everyone and their mother was shingling or when Blue Magic was the only thing that you could add for shine and sleeker styling.
I’m tired of people calling natural hair a “trend”. Growing hair that comes out of your own head can never be a trend, or are we just that screwed up as African-Americans?
I agree but for some it is a trend b/c the truth is everyone won’t stay natural. It’s ok to make that choice if that’s what u choose.
Yes Jesse, we as African-Americans have been screwed up as a result of being screwed, and sometimes screwing ourselves. We are no more screwed up than other people of African Diaspora, Indians, Polynesians, or any other group that has been colonized by European monarchies. However, we also are pretty awesome. Despite our journey, we have been graced as a people to influence culture around the world like no other group in the history of mankind without military force! We as African-Americans have issues but this particular issue is NOT UNIQUE to us; so give us a break. The style of Black natural hair is indeed a trend all over the world, especially in far-east Asia; Japan & K-Pop (Korean Pop) loves them some Black culture and our hair! And now some African American’s are loving our hair too. It’s trending.
Man people give people the side eye for every little thing that makes you want to be a better person. Whether its to go natural with your hair or do a cleanse for your body. Haters going to be haters and everyone is going to think that they no more than you and what is better for you. I mean its crazy that what I decide to with my body and myself upsets people’s lives so much. Its ri-donk-ulous.
To Answer Whitney’s question. Yes I am one of the females that have had their hair relaxed for SO LONG that when I did decide to not do relaxers anymore ( I got a bad professional relaxer)that when it started to grow out and the textures started mingle together and then not let go of each other I was like OMG! Since my hair had matured and I’ve been relaxing it etc. Unfortunately the products that was used on my hair ( as a child)didn’t work, BUT I was talking to my cousin and she reminded me that our grandmother used to use coconut oil in our hair. I was like “Really”? Being so young I didn’t pay attention what they put in my hair, just that it was being done. When I got to about 9 or 10 my Father used Pink lotion in my hair. I don’t know what happened, but it destroyed my hair and I had to get a Mushroom cut “Eeeeck”! I was in a mostly white school so I was teased like no other, but I have thick skin, so no biggie. One day I decided to not dry my hair and just let it dry naturally. HELLOOOOO SHRINKAGE! Then from people calling me mushroom cloud changed to sponge head. I was sent home (I WAS SENT HOME CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?) because my hair was causing a disruption and they wanted my hair I “fixed”, so my mom just braided it and I went to school the next morning. So as my hair started growing out from the mushroom/sponge look, it was a lot of thick long hair and for my mom it was easier to keep relaxing. I didn’t know anything was wrong with it, it was a way of life. I took breaks off and on got some Brandy Braids and when I was a Junior I got a weave (HATED IT, WAS NOT FOR ME.) I cut it out after a month. I then got micro braids and wore that style for 2 years then I joined the military and pretty much did cornrows my whole career it was easier to take care of especially underway. So technically during that time I was natural doing protective styling, but I didn’t label it that way. So when I got out of the Navy I decided I wanted a relaxer (just cause), I even put in some color cause I could in the military you can’t get what they call “Faddish”. I did relaxers from 2004 until last year and I stopped because I was given a perm that the salon made. Now my hair dresser and I knew by the consistency of the cream that it was not gonna do well in my hair, but the company (very well known product line)insisted that it was tested and it did great. My hair dresser was like “uh-uh”, but I told her we’ll go ahead and use it and if it doesn’t do well we’ll cut it and start again ( this was my choice). As we thought it broke off my hair and left my hair with this weird texture, so I decided to just for go the relaxer and let it grow out and just chop as I went along. I didn’t do the BC cause I have a big head and I felt my head would look like a balloon, it kind of did when I had the mushroom style. =)
Anyway so I have been natural for a little over a year and its hilarious to me that since my hair shrinks like 70% when wet I like to lightly blow dry to give it a little stretch. I had a lady lecture me about how that’s not natural and that I’m ashamed of my blackness cause I’m stretching my hair she proceeded to tell me what products to get and a lot the products I have tried and I don’t like how it is in my hair. Right now I am about no chemical products and different oils depending on my mood.
So when women jump in on me about what I am or not doing I just say “What-ev, I’m over it, I’m gonna wear my hair the way I want”. I see people going natural as someone who wants healthier hair, they aren’t trying to be faddish or whatever they are just making the choice that healthy hair is important. I dislike it when people try to take credit for other peoples awakenings.
This was a long stretched out thing, but I had to get it out.
If making a conscious decision to take better care of your hair, thereby making it more healthy, is a trend, wouldn’t this same argument apply to those who make the conscious decision to eat better and get in shape? Is all healthiness a trend just because some “have been healthy all their lives?” Let’s think about the bigger picture.
I first went natural back in 1995 and I have been natural on and on for the last 18yrs. For the past 11yrs I have been exclusively natural. I have rocked locs to Caesar hair cuts. There wasn’t any YouTube or blogs when I went natural…and not as nearly many hairstyles as there are now. I have learned so much in the recent years with technology…but I do miss the simplicity of natural hair care. We can learn a lot from each other if we’re open to it…but I can say I was one of the first and be proud I started a movement among friends and family.
This is a very important discussion, and I appreciate all sides and perspectives. To answer the question and share my personal perspective, it does get annoying that so many people seem to be hopping on the bandwagon and going natural. I agree, there is a distinction between embracing one’s hair as it grows out of your scalp and falling in with the crowd because Elle Varner looks good doing it, or Solange looks good doing it. Big difference. Glad you’re getting somewhere, but still a difference in motive and intention – and we have nothing in common.
It is sometimes annoying, as another reader said, that other natural Black women assume some type of sameness and start the conversation with the questions and set of assumptions, “how long did you transition?” or “well you’re hair is straightened so how are you natural?”. Just because you’ve been getting relaxers since you took your first steps and all of a sudden discovered that there’s nothing wrong with YOUR hair, doesn’t mean that everyone you see with curly/kinky tresses has had that same experience or is on some same journey of self-discovery or whatever it is you’re doing.
I grew up in a very pro-Black household/family, hearing that relaxers are terrible, and you can only get one (or a haircut) once you become an adult or if you just have too much hair. Of course growing up, I wanted my hair pressed because the size and frizz was always considered unwieldy – and that’s the result that comes out of imaging and the promotion of European standards of beauty over centuries. Even if you teach your children that their natural hair is ok, they will hear/see otherwise once they leave your home. These things are a part of girlhood and adolescence, especially for Black women. People always complimented me for having a lot of beautiful hair, but with a caveat – “it’s just too thick, it’s just too much.” The stylist that used to press my hair gave me a very mild relaxer in junior high (my father was furious!), and I only got my hair professionally done when I needed a touch up (thus the frizz, puffiness, and bigness persisted). So I decided to grow it out after about a year or two – and probably a total of maybe a dozen times getting a relaxer. That was over 10 years ago. So when ppl ask how long I’ve been natural, I respond, basically all my life. As far as I’m concerned, those 1-2 years of getting a relaxer and not even being able to tell the difference don’t count!
As a “veteran natural”, I am glad there are exponentially more resources/blogs/videos/real natural products available for people and some are helpful. Hair is trial and error for everyone! However, I find it problematic and very hard to believe that people have been relaxed so long that they just have absolutely no idea what to do with their own hair. And we are now saturated with videos, experts, blogs, products. What did your mother/grandmother/aunt use or do when you were a child? Have you really been getting relaxers that long that you don’t remember what your curls look/feel like and how they behave?
Again, with SOME newer naturals, I have nothing in common and I don’t want to talk hair journeys and acronyms with you as soon as we meet!
My mom first took me to the salon at 13 to get a relaxer and before that, my hair was always straightened or in braids. My hair was down my back and thick as all get out. So, to answer your question, YES, some of us new naturals have no idea what our hair looked or felt like before making the transition back to natural (and in my case, very curly) hair. Do not pass judgment on me because of that. Thank you.
Nor did I have any idea of how to take care of it. And that’s not a fatal flaw either. 9 months into my natural “journey,” I’m figuring it out, but I had to start FROM SCRATCH.
You seem to discount that some of us never knew anything BUT the straightening comb/relaxer from a young age. ps. That doesn’t make our families any less “pro black” than yours… especially for those of us with “too much” hair, as you said.
If someone has been continuously getting their hair done by others whether it be relaxers or using excessive heat and has been doing so since elementary school age into adult hood or late adolescent years then yes, it is very possible that they have no idea what to expect when they decide to go fully natural. In many cases, there are generations of family members that use relaxers and heat to maintain their hair so much so that even they(the moms, grandparents, great-grandparents) do not remember exactly how their natural texture use to be so as you can see, this is a cycle for some families. It’s all they know. All they know what to do is relax or straighten when there is new growth or when the hair is poofy or frizzy and that was it. So when someone decides to venture off and experiment with their natural texture, it can be a bit of a shock especially if healthy hair care practices was never apart of their regimen and especially if there was not even one person in their immediate circle that maintained healthy natural textured hair. So yes, it is very real that some naturals have no clue what to expect when they decide to go natural and depending on one’s perspective it can be a very fun, exciting and enlightening time for them no matter the hair type.
Oh Whitney!!! We’re so glad that you have come here today and graced us with all your knowledge about being natural and the “blackness”. We can’t get enough of your sarcasm and “My natural is better than your natural” attitude. We’re so happy you grew up in a perfect home where relaxers weren’t the norm. NOT!!!! Girl get over yourself. Yes, there are some of us who have been relaxing their hair since grade school; me since I was 7 or 8. I’m 31 and no I can’t remember what my hair looked like or remember what products was used besides bows, barettes, ribbons and balls. And I better not be a woman with that in my hair today, right? Yep, it’s problematic, but thankfully, we don’t have to rely on you for information because if we did, we’ll be in a world of trouble. Who cares how long a person has been natural? I know I could care less. Yes, it’s a great conversation sometime, but it doesn’t call for a challenge or an argument about what you should’ve done/used years ago. Get your nose out the air and chill. I’m happy when women are natural, weaved up, relaxed down, or wigged out!! Bottom line: I don’t care what others do to their hair; it’s theirs. Whether they’re jumping on the bandwagon or not. Let people be people and live; judging others is really not my sport. SMH…..
So I agree with the 1st paragraph of Whitney’s response. It is TRUTH! It appears that lots of new naturals are going natural because it’s trendy. These are typically the ones packing on 5 different products filled with 15+ TOXIC ingredients (per product) trying to get the Elle Varner curl pattern instead of embracing what they have. The dialogue of a new natural doing something due to a trend, versus someone embracing their God-given beauty is unmatched.
However Whitney, the majority of Black Americans were what one may consider “pro-Black” during the late 1960’s through the early 1970’s (ie. Black & Proud; Black consciousness) and once the 1980’s hit it was a jheri curl, weave, perm/relaxer state of mind that has since remained. And MOST Black Americans, other African descendants in the Diaspora digressed back to the pre-1960’s era of relaxing their hair, and their children’s hair. I am from the San Francisco Bay Area and my parents had huge afros and tell of stories of how the Black Panther Party had it out with the Po-Po (police) on their block. And most people who I know who were a part of the movement do not wear natural hair styles today and neither do their descendants. I believe Angela Davis even wears a curly wig 🙂 It sounds like your parents stayed the course, and I think that’s great.
***BUT! It appears that you’re out of touch with the MAJORITY of Black America (and this goes across socio-economic lines). Most people have been discouraged from wearing their natural hair without permanent and/or chemical alterations. And YES, most people received their first perm in elementary school and do not know how to style their kinky/curly hair! Unless we want to wear cornrows with the beads or perhaps 2 afro-puffs like my 2 years old cousin. Umm No. Even though neo-soul in the late 90’s brought some natural adult hair styles, most of those incorporated weaves. So most of us did not know how to create adult fashionable hair styles to compliment today’s looks. Provided my previous explanation, you can see that it is very plausible that many Black women do not know how to style their natural hair.
To answer the greater question, no it doesn’t matter when you went natural. What really defines you is as Whitney said your intent & motives. Although those who were doing it pre-youtube mania were the brave soldiers in the struggle (a little dramatic, I know). Today, the natural hair movement has evolved and I don’t wish the awkward moments I had in 2006 as college student in Los Angeles, aka the Weave Capital of the World on anyone! I’m not bitter that when recently I visited my old campus there was lots of natural hair women. And as corny as it may sound, I’m happy that people are dabbling on the natural side, even if it is just a fad. Unlike Whitney, I can EMPATHIZE with other Black women because I understand the challenge of not conforming to European standards of hair beauty and making a choice in adulthood what should’ve fostered in me as a youth.
But before this becomes a 4-page letter…..To Whitney and other Whitney-esque folk, who are irritated and don’t want people to assume things about them because they are Black and have natural textured hair…it sounds like you have that “all Black people aren’t the same; don’t assume just because I’m Black” chip on your shoulders. And in this season and with this movement, you are the minority. Please get over it, and perhaps learn about the broader Black experience and perhaps you may be able to connect.
***And if this was Whitney of Naptural85 on youtube, I enjoy your DIY recipes and your vids 🙂 I like your approach to natural hair as it is HEALTHY, Non-toxic, and simple. I ain’t even mad at you, we all need to understand (if not embrace) the struggles of others and have some compassion. Peace in the Middle East and in these ghetto streets. I’m out!
I agree with your post but I got a relaxer when I was 5 years old. The only memories of my natural hair were pictures taken prior to that. So, no, when I went natural at the age of 20- I was LOST!
People on here talking about they are veteran naturals or were “early” in the “movement” in 2008 or 2010!? LOL.
Shit, you are/were a renegade if 1) you’ve never had a relaxer or 2) you went natural in the 1980s or 1990s.
Otherwise, you stand on the shoulders of those who came before you.
I think you’re comment just shows how meaningless all of this line drawing and labeling one “renegade” can be. I went natural in 2001 at 17 and can tell you I had “no shoulders to stand on” in the early years of my journey. I think a persons perceptions about the popularity/ appropriateness of natural and the resources available varies with environnment. I’m not really sure what’s really to gain in a conversation about who went natural first. There’s no prize for it.
*your comment
I Agree 2008/2010 doesn’t make someone a veteran natural. That is quite funny. I also have a ton of respect for those who returned to natural hair when it was a lot harder to do so. But I will say that when I started transitioning in 2008 I had never seen anyone nor did I personally know anyone with natural hair that actually wore their hair in the styling options that we are exposed to now. When I decided to go natural I had no idea there was a movement going on until I came on line and starting looking for any information I could find, and was blown away. Most of the Women that I learned from had only been natural 2,3,5 years tops. I never came across one person who had been natural since the 80’s or 90’s or their entire lives. I have recently met a lot of life long naturals or girls who have 9, 10 years in and they admit that they still need help and don’t know what to do! Many of the women whom I’ve met recently who are true vets say, they had no clue how to wear their hair and that they were happy about the recent movement and influx of products because it finally brought them the help the needed and other options. Today I am actually learning from some newly natural ladies as well as those who are veterans we all seem to be helping each other out. Which I think is awesome.
But you have no idea whether or not it really was harder to do. For all you know, someone who went natural 10+ years ago could have had tons of family and friend knowledge and support. While someone who just went natural last year may have no support other than online. That online support doesn’t help much when you walk outside and get ugly stares and rude comments or when your family and friends bash you for your decision to wear your hair natural.
Going natural or staying natural is easy for some people. They have the proper support, the drive to do it no matter what, or something else working for them. For some people it is really hard. They may be on their own. The year when you went back to natural doesn’t define the level of difficulty required to do it, nor the amount of respect that the person should receive.
Why? Why is this so hard? WHY? Why are black girls still traumatized by hair? WHY? FYI- the afro hairstyle was popularized in the 1950s and 1960s. That there are black girls who have never heard of or seen Miriam Makeba, Nina Simone, Cicely Tyson, Abby Lincoln, Pam Grier and too many more to name wearing their natural hair and looking gorgeous, including a top black model from the 1980s whose name escapes me — WHY?! in 2013 are we talking about veterans who have been wearing their hair natural for three years. Come on now people. A little honesty would really be a breath of fresh air. I don’t know about the hate some of you are experiencing. Where would that be in the Pacific Northwest with the five aryan nations, or the HBCUs in the southeastern states? Then say so. I wasn’t allowed to march with my high school graduating class and I was the national negro scholar! I was dis-invited as maid of honor in my own mother’s wedding because of my natural hair, and I caved for her sake and washed the press and curl right out afterwards. We all have a story; let’s hear them. WHY in 2013 are we fighting over whether it is easy or difficult to go natural. WE must do better by each other.
Please! I stand on no one’s shoulders. Like the OP I made the decision to go natural without provocation and did so without knowing there were FB pages and websites where other’s were discussing natural hair, and did so for the second time in my life.
It would be very helpful and people didn’t feel they had to one up each other. If you’ve been natural for a decade or more, good for you. If you have not, you shouldn’t be made to feel like you have to bow down to those who have been natural longer. This is just another way for us to denigrate each other and it would be nice if it would simply stop. If you don’t want to help someone along their journey, at least recommend a website/FB page or someone willing to provide the help.
I’ve been natural since 2002 and I don’t know everything about natural hair because I’ve had locs for 11 years. Went straight from relaxer to locs. I plan on cutting my locs in a few months and I feel like I have to learn about my hair all over again.
So I work in a professional fashion based industry and I am the first person in my building to go natural. I am still a newbie. But the only thing that frustrates me is the time I’m taking to learn my hair and experiment with styles meanwhile there are girls in my building that decided to go natural after me and they come to work looking ridiculous. And I want to say this a sentiment I felt even when I had relaxed hair. We all know as black people we all get judged on someone else’s bad behavior. And I don’t feel like that stops at hair. I want to BC but I feel extra stress to have my hair be super on point at work because of the girls that don’t.
Don’t get me wrong I share what I’ve learned when asked but hair is a touchy subject so I can just run up on someone who’s hair looks crazy without them soliciting my advice. In closing: people in general who can’t get there hair together before going out in public irratate me. Natural or not.
You sound shallow and sadly confirm the largely untrue stereotype about people in fashion. You’re wasting your time on what other people are doing and thinking. I don’t think you’ll have an easy journey if you keep worrying about being a self appointed natural ambassador at work with ‘super on point’ hair. Chill out.
Is it really that serious, though? And I’m just curious as to what constitutes looking “ridiculous.” Edges not laid? Curls not “poppin’ enough? Maybe they’re not feeling yours, either–but to each her own. It’s the shallow-sounding natural types like you that give the natural game a bad name. Relax a little–do you, & let them do them. 🙂
I just feel like there is no place for harshness in this whole conversation. If you’ve been natural all your life that’s cool, you got a head start! Complaining that people have it easier now and so it’s less authentic is like saying people can’t make real friends becuse they can call instead of writing letters. Resources become available in time for some people and not for others, that’s just a feature of the passage of time. Plus, going natural is just realizing that you should be yourself. It’s just something that you are and the length of time is mostly just figuring out a good regimen! I’ve been natural for six years and from the day I big chopped I had absolutely no desire to relax my hair again. I have only really gotten the hang of handling and length retention in the last two years, but I’ve been fully in it the whole time! I also think judging people for transitioning is silly. They are mostly trying to keep length and ease of styling from what I’ve seen. I might have done the same if I knew about it! Even though I chopped six years ago I didn’t have any access to “the natural community”… I was just tired of paying to straighten my hair, and made the choice on my own. We shouldn’t come up with fake ways to divide ourselves, it’s a total waste of energy!
I am a Veteran Natural since 1999. I transitioned for a semester and then cut my hair off for the New Year. I didn’t hide it either–I wore my fro and never got a relaxer again.
As a Veteran natural I AM SO GRATEFUL for the new natural hair movement and more important for TECHNOLOGY for bringing us together and making the knowledge accessible to all. In 99′ I knew nothing about how to care for natural hair! My styles were limited and my hair was crunchy!! Because of the natural trend and the knowledge that came with it, my hair is healthier and longer than it has ever been.
As a Veteran it annoys me to hear other Veterans say they were natural before the trend as a way of looking down on other naturals. As a woman of color I am overjoyed to see so many naturals and I am so proud of US ALL!!
I’ve found some of the newbies can be harsh, like they can’t understand why everybody doesn’t have it together. They talk down to people who suggest old school products as a suggestion if the new stuff isn’t working. They talk like these new natural products have been on the shelves for decades and you should know what to use right off the bat. And a lot of vets seem to be VERY harsh and mean to people who may still perm and/or have tons of questions because they still haven’t come to grips with becoming natural yet. I will answer anybodies questions and I don’t have a problem with sharing my journey. No one has been rude to me personally and I dont mind helping if I can. I’ve stopped a lady from going back to perms, I’ve helped people decide to go natural all without being pushy, mean or rude, i would answer any question anybody had. i was just excited to talk hair. I went natural in 07, didn’t find the right YouTube channels, lots of trial and error with shelf products, carols daughters, kinky curly etc. lots if money spent but I never quit. I compliment anybody I see rocking their natural hair whether its a child, teen or adult. The smiles and energy that radiates from a woman when you compliment her is the best feeling in the world. I’m almost always moved to tears. Ill just say why I’m that moved, I had an aunt who gave me an unwanted “big chop” as a preteen and I went through it with bullying. I was scarred for a long time because of it. In ’82-’83 there were NO natural products lol. So when I see natural folks and its acceptable to be the person you were born to be and the folk who used to tease me now compliment me and ask for advice I gladly give it. I gladly receive advice as well. I think the only issue I do have us when I see people that don’t care for their children’s hair. I don’t care if your a celeb or a regular chick. That could come from my own childhood scars and the fact that I couldn’t have children of my own. If you’re carring for yourself care for the baby too, it’s great for their self esteem trust me. I would just like to see women be proud of who they are, become more conscious about the way we treat each other. If someone suggests a product that means it works for her. Just because it doesn’t work for you she’s not wrong for suggesting it. If you are mean to a woman who has questions on becoming natural, you may turn her away from becoming natural. dont be rude, you may save her health, and self esteem by giving her encouragement to go natural. She may not believe her hair can grow as long or be as healthy as yours, she’ll come with all the excuses. She’s just like YOU were when you didn’t believe, you where once in her shoes at the beginning of your journey. Sorry it’s so long, just don’t like women mistreating each other about hair. This fighting between naturals, weave wearers, and permies gets on my nerves. I don’t know who I’m talking to but I’m talking to somebody and I hope their listening. Peace.
This is my second time being natural, since childhood. The first time I went natural was in 2002. I stayed natural, until 2005. At that time, the only naturals I saw were either mixed girls or women who had locs. I didn’t think about it much at the time. I was a college student and kept busy, so my hair was not my primary focus. In fact, my hair probably looked like a hot mess, until I discovered two-strand twists. After that, my popularity grew! Hehe! 😛
I guess I was lucky, since I didn’t really focus on the opinions of others at the time. It really did not matter at all. No one was blatantly mean or nasty towards me, so it didn’t phase me. The strangest thing about my first natural experience that I noticed is that I spent less time and attention on my hair and it grew at a more faster pace then it does right now. Sure, I’ve retained a normal amount of length! But, the first time around, my hair grew insanely fast! I don’t know if it was because I was younger or less manipulation. Who knows?!!
I don’t care if someone has been natural for 2 months or 20 years! Why should I care about that nonsense? What other people do with their hair is their business! I wouldn’t pick an argument with someone over something so trivial! Naturals–seasoned or otherwise, really need to chill out and stop fighting over meaningless things. If you were natural back in 80s, 90s, early 2000s, good for you, boo boo! 😛
outta curiosity where do those of us who’ve been natural for all of our lives fit in? lol do we count in this number or is it just for those who’d been relaxed?
Of course you count! I can only discuss my experience that was from relaxed to natural before it got big. I cannot explain what you may have gone through but respect and appreciate your journey.
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Time doesn’t stand still for anyone. Therefore, ‘unseasoned’ natural today will be totally ‘seasoned’ tomorrow. The amount of time I’ve been natural is awesome to ME, but I don’t expect accolades from anyone else on the count of that amount of time. It’s a long time to some and also considered a short time to many. It’s completely arbitrary. Also, going natural may be slightly easier at this time, but it’s certainly not simple… It has been overly complicated, commercialized, overly marketed for monetary gain. Sifting through the mountains of lies, false claims, and flashy advertizing campaigns isn’t my idea of easy street. I think more than anything it’s our online ‘support groups’ that are the biggest foot forward for us. We could have done that for one another a long time ago, if we’d really wanted to. I’m just glad we’re moving forward in this process and not backward.
I really liked this conversation. Which was talked about alot when I was in college from 2008-2012. Many of my friends and I slowly transitioned to natural. Some wore braids, weaves, did the big chop, or found natural ways to keep their hair straight. What I learned in that process is that we as black women, often judge other women’s hair journey in comparison to what we think is the proper way to be natural… Whatever that means. If a woman didnt do the big chop on campus or wore her head under braid, basically not going thru the tiny afro stage. They were often ousted from the so called natural community. It annoyed me, because who are any us to say that because a woman transitions or doesnt do the big chop, she isnt a natural?! Who are we to define another woman’s hair journey. And honestly who damn cares how that woman or this woman decided to rid her hair of chemically treated hair . i did find the women who were natural longer tended to be more harsh. But in general, women were harsh against each other, and sometimes it was sheer ignorance.
I never talked about being natural until recently, I even created some teeshirts.www.cafepress.com/iscobiss. I digress, my mother never allowed me to get a relaxer. She was afraid I would damage my hair like she did. So I wore big dukie braids, until Jr. High when I was allowed to get press and curls. But only on special occasions, so my sister would use conditioners and make concoctions to make my hair manageable. I wore lots of tight ponytails and my edges fell out. In high school it was tough because everyone had nice haircuts. I by this time perfected China knots. This was back in the mid nineties. On humid days my hair would get big which was not cool.I also discovered miss cool and would curl my hair with perm rods and flexi rods. By senior year I was allowed to get a relaxer. I had the best hair cuts but only the front half. My hair was really long and started to break. My mom was right. My hair went from mid back to just over my shoulder. When I went to college I didn’t think about my hair till I needed a touch up. I went to school with right black girls. They did their own relaxers. Not me I blow dried. Mt natural hair started coming back so I wore my hair in twists like the brat. Yes I’m old.lol. I started feeling liberated because the white girls loved my hair, I was different and they knew it. So ever since I was natural its been over a decade since I graduated. I felt like I invented twist outs and flat twists which I wrote in H.S. Girls always asked what I did but most thought my curls were natural. If I had known it would have been so embraced I would have taught other people. I have perfected my natural hair in my mind. Maybe that’s how the seasoned naturals feel, like oh now everyone wants to jump on the band wagon. I don’t feel that way I just hope more women stay away for good from the chemicals. People would tell me you have good hair that’s why you can stay natural but I need a “perm”. Smh. I am glad women with courser hair now embrace it and have learned to care for it. Thanks for letting me share and thanks for sharing. Be blessed.
I’m 35 and I’ve never had a relaxer. My mother wouldn’t allow it. Before moving to Oakland a few years ago, I’d never really had a conversation with anyone about ‘why’ I wear my hair natural. Of course I understand the historical politics of natural hair for many black women. However, I have to admit that it’s not really something I want to talk about with strangers and it’s a turn-off when anyone (male or female, black or other) uses the way I wear my hair as an entré to getting to know me better or a way of expressing sameness. As in, ‘I’m transitioning and…’
We both may have natural hair but that doesn’t mean we have anything else in common.
I think a stranger that opens with a ‘transitioning’ line is up there with strangers that ask if they can touch my hair. Perhaps not as offensive, but certainly as boring.
I think that an important point in this discussion is that Black women are not monolithic.
I mean that we all are not robots that think and behave and do the same things. The fact that some people went natural when it was not as supported and some people went natural more recently or the fact that people have as many reasons as there are personalities for going natural makes us rich and NOT one-dimensional as a people. It would be boring if we were all the same way.
I hate it when people fall into the thinking that all Black people are a certain way; it traps us in a box and in that box we do not grow or expand our minds. That we have many different motivations and reasons, makes us…human. Sometimes people forget that Black women are human.
I would also like to give a shout out to include women that never permed their hair at all. Another color in the rainbow!
I just read the title and skimmed through the article. To me it really does matter if you went natural before it was popular. To go natural 8+ years ago meant doing something with your hair that no one else was doing. Especially if you big chopped… So it it really a badge of honor just for the guts it took to do it. Now I see so many naturals and I love it but it won’t discount the people who went natural when it wasn’t popular because that was hard. It also depends on the reason why you went natural. Was it for black pride? For hair health? People’s intentions play a big part. I’m just saying… If you went natural 10 years ago in some small town in Tennessee (for having pride in your African features) vs. you going natural Atlanta because you some some woman with a bomb ass natural hairstyle, then that is 2 different intentions and frequencies. I respect both but one gets more respect than that other in my opinion.
It wasn’t a source of pride for me because I never viewed relaxers as trying to assimilate. My skin makes it very apparent that I’m a black woman and I’ve never wanted to be anything else or cared if anyone else wanted me to change. Relaxers were something I tried out. No longer getting them wasn’t an attempt to embrace my ‘African-Ness’. No motive behind it. No bad relaxer. No hair thinning or breakage. No need to save money. I just did.
Am I somehow less ‘African’ and less worthy of ‘respect’ because my viewpoint is different? That’s obnoxious and I can tell you that ‘others’ don’t give damn if I was in TN or ATL when they see me. I’m still a black woman in America.
I’m from a very rural area of the South. Do I get extra points in the natural hair respect game? Before going natural (if I’m allowed to call it that, maybe there are rules against that as well) I never understood what people meant when they said we were our own worst enemies, but I totally understand it now because something that is supposed to be so ‘liberating’ is nothing but another divide and conquer strategy and we did it to ourselves.
I’m going on 10 yrs natural so I guess (?) that makes me a vet. I don’t care who goes natural or why. I’m just here to help any way I can.
I don’t call myself an expert or a guru. I’m still learning just like you are. The reason I started my blog was so that all naturals -no matter texture or time in the game- can bond, share experiences, and learn from one another.
Yes, some of us think we’re better or more “real” because we were natural before it was trendy. Oh well. So be it. I don’t fault anyone for making their transition when they did. Everyone is not on the same path. The important thing is that we’re both here now.
Being new or older in the game doest really matter. Good advice is good advice. What your seeing is a community growing and simply getting a different. Viewpoints that are new and sometimes I’m sad to say a carry over from the straight hair world. People GO natural and STAY natural for many different reasons. We are all never going to be on the same page about things for that very reason. These days everybodys definition of natural is so diffrent now. Weave, heat, commerical hair products, silicone grease etc are all up for grabs Lol. The funny thing is these so called rules never really exsisted in real life only in peoples minds. All this we should be supporting each other stuff is tiresome cause we are all individuals who think differently. Everyone is responsible for their own hair. I’m very anti heat, weave and a lot of other things that have cropped of in the natural hair community but you know what so what? Who am I to tell someone how they should enjoy their journey? If your new and some vet comes at you harsh just move on to someone who will not be so snippy.
old or new we gotta stop being so darn sensitive! Everybody is not a Nazi.
because they don’t like ur weave or tell you silicones n grease are bad. New ones are not know it all but probably just enthusiastic cause its new. Its not that serious.
Great article.
As a pre-movement natural I have to admit I have been harsh on newbies.
I think you hit it on the nail. We didn’t have all this love and support and we caught a ton of flack for going …as I like to call it…Back to Black.
Now we have what is feeling a lot like a trend going on…not at all a movement anymore.
Every natural blog now is covered with “How to Go Back to Straight!” And very few people are doing the big chop anymore (a mental shock to the system, journey in its self)…everyone is “transitioning” (which reads to me as, trying to hold on to the straight hair as long as possible). It feels watered down and fake.
It really does rub me the wrong way and I am trying to work on my issues…cause they are my issues. I really really would love to see a movement that is revolutionary for the minds and souls of little Black girls to come though…not something that just passes by on the wind cause its the latest trend.
I went natural 6 years ago and the ‘trend’ may have started back then but I didn’t know. So I wore a puff all summer and when winter hit my hair was so brittle and dry I gave up. I wasn’t trying to be part of a movement I just wanted healthy hair, plus I was broke. So I BC’d before I knew it was a term.
This time around I have been ‘transitioning’ for a year. And it’s not because I want to hold in to my straight hair. My permed hair was gorgeous. I refuse to change my license picture as a reminder of how beautiful it was. But I moved and my hair does not like the new climate I’m in so I decided to ditch the chemicals. I can’t remember the last time I wore my hair straight and I don’t miss it. I haven’t BC’d because I don’t want to lose the styling freedom I have by losing length. Most people the see my hair think I am totally natural. But do see a BC in my bear future.
Anyway, I think the point I’m trying to make is that people go natural for different reasons. Some do it so they can experiment with color. Some because its a a good trade off to having straight hair that they can put heat in more frequently without it getting damaged as fast. Other love the curl and the drama (this one is me). Most do it because they want healthy hair and that comes in many forms even as a natural.
I really enjoyed your comments. You understand what I meant in this article. No, by no stretch of the imagination have I been natural for as long as some but even back in 2005 there wasn’t much info or products out for us as there is now.
It is much easier to go natural (or back to black, I like that by the way) now and transitioning does seem like a headache and prolongs getting to know your hair. I BC’d before I knew what it was but if I tried to hold onto those straightened and sad ends I would have failed miserably. It was empowering to cut the processed hair off and start from scratch. I get it may not be for for everybody and transitioning may be a way to not shock your system but nothing was as liberating as cutting those hairs off and running my fingers through my natural hair.
Thanks for sharing.
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A BC isn’t mandatory. I went natural over 10 years ago and I didn’t cut my hair. I just stopped getting relaxers because my stylist at the time said I didn’t really need one and I didn’t think another thing about it. I didn’t know it was transitioning or that transitioning is a way to hold on to long hair or that I needed to braid my hair or cover it with weave or even be embarrassed by it. It wasn’t a “journey” and it definitely doesn’t have to be a traumatic or strife-ridden experience.
I’ve been told that I’m not a real natural because I color and use heat from time to time. I’ve been told I’m not a real natural because I don’t do twists and braids. I’ve been told I’m not natural because of my hair texture. I’ve been told I’m not natural because I didn’t really need a relaxer in the first place and I didn’t get that many relaxers to start. I’ve been given the, ‘I can’t go natural because my hair won’t look like yours’ line. I’ve been told that I’m not natural because I didn’t have a journey complete with dates and pictures and I don’t know the lingo and it wasn’t ‘hard’ for me. I’ve had naturals discount what I have to say because I ‘always had long hair anyway’ or my hair isn’t 68QKA, so I can’t possibly know anything. I get grief for using non-natural products. I get grief because my regimen isn’t very regimented and only requires a few products. Sometimes I just want people to hush.
I didn’t realize that hair was so politicized that there were levels of naturalness or people who were more natural than others for whatever arbitrary reason they impose. It’s all a bit ridiculous and makes me hesitant to even discuss hair, so if I give a stand-offish vibe it’s because I’m tired of ignorance from all sides-relaxed, new naturals, and old naturals.
Well, I’m here to tell you that for many months since happening upon this site, I’ve been bursting at the seams, ecstatic, blown away, overjoyed at all you young ladies – SO ABSOLUTELY PROUD OF YOU ALL. I’m not old as the sun or anything, but I was a lonely, natural in a bone straight world in the early 90s, dreaming of the day you guys would show up and you have not let me down. Like the sky opened up or something ! Please do not pay attention to someone who might give you a little hard time. We’ve ALL come so far. Most everyone wants some validation. I suspect it’s their disappointment talking. You know you’ve got it going on. I’ve also been proud of how supportive most everyone’s been here. Nothing’s 100 percent, though and that’s ok because we all have much to learn from each other and that never goes out of style.
Nothing annoys me more than natural hair nazis who believe that your hair defines who you are. So annoying.
What a harsh word to use. Some naturals believe that their hair defines who they are. It doesn’t make them wrong or nazis…. Nothing annoys me more than people making judgements off of what naturals believe about natural hair.
I agree. Why we have to be called such ugly and extreme terms as Nazis if we choose to go no heat, no color no….whatever? You do what you like and let me do what I like.
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I understood what CB meant. She’s not talking about ALL naturals. She meant those who define themselves AND OTHERS by their hair and says critical things about OTHERS hair based on THEIR definition of what a “true natural” is. Things like whether or not you use all natural products, wear weaves/wigs or not, or wear your hair curly or straight. And they bully others with their narrow view. In which case it IS annoying. Whether it is flat-ironed or curly, in a big fro or under a wig – THAT doesn’t or shouldn’t define you. Hair should NEVER define you. What if something happened to you physically and you lost all your hair? Do you suddenly lose meaning? HECK no! Who we truly are comes from within. Yes, we can let our outside REFLECT who we are, but that is what the outside really is – a reflection of who we really are on the inside. A cancer patient who lost all their hair is still beautiful – natural, curly, straight or under a wig. Don’t lose yourself to shallow, external or temporary circumstances, ladies. The physical body is dying every day; your spirit lives forever.
Veteran or newbie does it really matter? I don’t think so because we were all born natural and somewhere along the way we or somebody else decided to perm it. Some who’ve never altered their hair don’t know how to care for it and are still learning and some do. Some Naturals who just rediscovered their hair texture know more about their hair than others and some don’t. But I really want to stress something here: whether vet, newbie or in-between naturals, we all learn from our OWN texture of hair and those who had lot of information to share were those who took their time to experiment, research and adjust themselves according to how their hair was reacting. And anybody who can take time to learn about his/her hair will turn into a jedi or hair guru for somebody who has no clue about his/her hair whether newbie or veteran.
Natural hair is not a movement nor a trend, it has always been there from the beginning because it’s the hair we were born with. Though it may seem that way in this society, in other ones it is not and in some other it’s even dying (perming is the trend!!!).
We should be happy that in this era we are able to share our knowledge with those who have no clue instead of being judgemental. This is not a race and being a seasoned natural doesn’t mean knowing best what works for somebody else’s head of hair. We all learn from somebody else and when we can’t find the answer or when the answer we were given doesn’t work for us, we experiment, research and educate ourselves then share what we discovered. We need to stop the craziness and humble ourselves, spread love and stand together in unity because we all want one thing: a healthy head of hair easy to manage with fly styles; and we are willing to help, give tips and advice on being natural because we are bold enough to dream about that day when all black women will rock their natural hair fiercely (just dreaming lol). So why don’t we just do that with love and respect for those who are already on the path ( seasoned, newbie and transitioner) and those who aspire to be?
Happy hair journey y’all and let’s stop being mean to each other like babies at a playground.
I never talk about how long I’ve been natural unless absolutely necessary because this gate swings both ways. I’ve been natural a long time with pretty good results but I don’t have any magical knowledge to give— and this makes some women angry and even verbally abusive.
…Hair is an emotionally charged topic for Black women and unfortunately negative aspects tend to get noticed more but everyone & situation is different – it’s best to take the positive and leave the rest.
I’m one of those old school naturals. I grew up only knowing natural hair until the curly perm days. After a few years of frying my hair i’d had enough but the last straw was when I went for my final touch up and was told by the hairdresser that I was imagining the burning sensation on my scalp. It took about 3 months after that day to get a pair of scissors to my raggerdy permed ends. That was circa ’93 and i’m happy to say I have never looked back and was happy to return to my twists and twists outs. I was use to washing and maintaining my hair from the age of 10 so looking after my hair in that sense was no biggie. However, I do wish that all the information on products and how to properly handle afro hair was available back then. I am most grateful for the wealth of information which has been made available more recently, it’s also great to see more and more females wearing their hair in it’s natural form as when it comes to our hair I am very biased. Personally I have had nothing but love from our men(quite a number of females too)towards my hair. Overall it’s been a very positive experience for me. There are a few negatives I have observed when it comes to the so called ‘natural trend’ today. the number 1 thing I have witnessed is not fully embracing natural hair in it’s entirety for example, people hating on Solanges hair because she choses not wear perfectly formed twist out. Not understanding and accepting that your going to have hair which can do things or act a certain way which others can’t. Last but not least is the hair typing system. I refuse to subscribe to this especially after learning who endorses it and their disdain for afro textured hair. All in all it’s refreshing to see so many of our females with this new found confidence in themselves.
Females?
Ive never understood why some people act like that! heck I’ve been natural all my life & I just BC’d!
I did not even know natural hair was a movement or a trend. I just wanted healthy hair. I went natural in 2008.
Wow!!! Personally, I came in the game in the middle, I’m not seasoned nor brand new. I’m still figuring out this game and going with the flow. I honestly wish I was natural my whole life, because I didn’t have a choice at age 6. Some were natural before it became trendy like my sister and I know more than my sister does about natural hair. So, it really is a case by case situation. At the end of the day, IT’S HAIR! Not that serious! 🙂
To me it seems to be the other way around. My last relaxer was May 2010 so I started in the beginning of the “natural movement”. So now 3.5 years later my hair is reaching MBL and I get some of the nastiest looks from newly natural women. It kinda bothers me because if they would ask about my regimen or products I would gladly give them insight but instead they just throw shade.
The last time I permed my hair was in the summer of 2004 and then that winter it broke off. So I just cut it all off. It was about an inch long. I knew how my hair behaved because I didn’t get a perm until I was 14 years old ( I wanted to have long straight hair for high school, just like my cousins )
I was really more concerned not about the texture but about how it would look on my big head. ( Like the article the other day about big girls not being able to rock TWAs )
I’m the spitting image of my father and I DID NOT want to look like his son, lol.
And this was during a time when no one was cutting their hair off. But I didn’t care. I wasn’t about a revolution. I was just tired of fighting my hair. I’d get so many compliments from people that they loved my hair because I had good hair… Ughhhh ( you don’t know how much that term burns me up… ) I have hair and most times when people see it, its well maintained. If thats good hair, then we can all achieve this. Just do whatever your hair needs. Thats pretty much it. There is no need for bashing other people and the reasons for their journey. There is no reason to be militant. There is no reason to be envious. Perm it, dye, twist it, lock it, weave it up. Go towards whatever you want. Just being honest with yourself. No one needs validation from others. Cuz i can tell you this… it doesn’t matter what my hair looks like to others. To me, it always looks good and thats the only opinion that matters. Compliments are nice but self-validation is soooo much more fulfilling…. but i digress. take care yall.
So I have never had a perm before so I never went natural “per se” but I think the issue I as a “old natural” have with *some* “new naturals” is when they tell me I’m not natural because I wear a wig every now and then or I decided to wear a weave once in awhile. When they tell me I can’t be considered natural anymore because of a temporary styling choice. I never had to hear anybody tell me I wasn’t natural because of a style choice until this movement and I do find it irritating that some women feel they can make up rules about what natural is & is not when they have only been doing it for 3 months and I have been doing it for almost 21 years. After 21 years you can get bored, don’t judge me for wearing a weave for a month. I love my hair and I learned to love it about 9 years ago. I’m not covering it because I feel like I need to comply with popular US culture or some craziness. I just want a fun change while limiting the damage on my actual hair. But new naturals don’t understand yet what it is like to have been natural for so long and that for me, the emotional/political/psychological hardship I had with my hair ended awhile ago and isn’t particularly relevant to my hair choices today. For me being natural isn’t about finding myself or proving I’m better than someone else, or showing my pride in my culture. For me, being natural just is. With the movement it is becoming a lot more than that, which is both good and bad.
ALSO JUST BECAUSE I EDUCATE MYSELF MORE THEN YOU AND THERE’S MORE INFO DOESN’T MEAN MY HAIR IS MORE ACCEPTED NOW THEN BACK IN THE DAY. THE STRUGGLES ARE STILL THE SAME IS SO IS THE IGNORANCE. LOOK AT HOW Y’ALL TALK ABOUT SOLANGE, BLU IVY, AND OTHERS THAT SHOW THEIR TEXTURE.
I want to say that I have been natural before it was popular,since I was 20 , I turn 36 in a week ,you would think I had long hair down my back for all those years natural,not I knew nothing about taking care of my hair or that of my daughters ,I discovered curlynikki and youtube this year ,and those led me to blackgirllonghair,everything I have learned are from younger sisters and I appreciate it, haircrush,naptural85,mahogonycurls,taryn guy,african export,kimmaytube,and so on all have had natural hair for a much shorter time than me except maybe ms kimmy, my point is you learn from whomever has the information,i learn from my kids all the time so why would it be any different from people who have been apart of the natural hair community for far less time than myself but know more about taking care of natural hair, I love the wealth of information and ideas coming out of the millennial generation its fantastic. a special thanks to Melissa Harris Perry for having a segment on her show about natural black hair that’s really where my healthy natural hair journey began,the show featured Nikki Walton from curlynikki.com and here I am.
THIS IS WHAT BOTHERS ME I WAS NATURAL BEFORE AS WELL AS A CHILD UP TO MY TEENS THEN OFF THEN RIGHT BACK ON UNTIL MY 20’S ( EARLY 2000’S) WHICH IS THE CASE FOR MOST OF US. I DO NOT ANNOUNCE THAT TO ANY ONE WHO IS NEW TO THIS. WHAT IS THE POINT. IDK HOW MANY TIMES I’VE BEEN ON THE WEB AND SEEN COMMENTS SUCH AS ” I WAS NATURAL BEFORE IT BECAME POPULAR” “I WAS NATURAL WHEN NO ONE ELSE WAS”?? REALLY NOW? SO YOU CREATED NATURAL HAIR?? IT PISSES ME OFF BC I DID NOT RETURN TO NATURAL HAIR TO BE TRENDY. I JUST WANTED MY HAIR BACK. WHAT IS TRENDY ABOUT THAT LOL. I’M SORRY YOU PEOPLE DON’T DO DESERVE A BADGE OR SPECIAL TITLE BC YOU MAY HAVE BEEN DOING IT A LITTLE LONGER. TO BE HONEST THERE ARE SOME WHO BEEN NATURAL YEARS AND STILL NOT KNOW WHAT THEY’RE DOING. SO PLEASE COME BACK TO EARTH, ONE ISN’T BETTER THEN THE OTHER
Wow. Does it really matter? From the posts here it sounds like we are all benefitting from the new and old naturals.
I personally go on you tube and blogs get the information I need and want. I decide what I want to take from it. Not everyone is going to do something how YOU want, or say something how YOU wanna hear it. If you learnt something great if not move on if not go find someone you like. That’s what I do:)
I really don’t care who is new or old as long as the satisfy what I am looking for at the time.
I have been natural since the day I was born (15 years ago) Not a single chemical has ever even so much as grazed my head.I was never allowed to have a perm or wear weave, and I am still not to this day. For the longest I would wonder why this was so, and now looking at all of these statistics and topics being researched by faithful and deeply rooted people I see why. I find myself again asking: Why? My reason being, if tearing newer naturals down for becoming natural, wouldn’t that be promoting chemicals? Then, wouldn’t that make the offender the hypocrite? As naturals we are a community, a community that is constantly growing. Our job as a community is to encourage each other as black women and human beings. Even if some are becoming natural because enjoy the trend, shouldn’t we be proud that women (for the first time in decades) are seeing their natural hair for the true beauty that it really is. I guess I am more lost than anything else, and I’m hurt that we are discouraging each other when it comes to embracing our true selves (or if you will, our roots),(No pun intended). I really hope these “seasoned naturals” realize even though they may have been doing it longer than others..they weren’t the first ones either, and we need to be encouraging each other more than anything, and more than ever. God bless, and let’s continue to love!
wow! what a well-thought out comment. and you’re only 15? I wish i had half as much wisdom as you when i was 15 (or 25…)
Wow thank you so much! God bless!
@Serenity. For a young woman of any age, your reasoning skills are exceptional.
Thank you so much!
black woman always have some to argue about who was natural first next they going to be having arguments about who had the first big apple bottom or i bleach my skin first
Seasoned natural here! Texturizer-free since 2001!!! And I learn new stuff about natural hair care all the time! It doesn’t bother me at all that so many are going natural now. I don’t really care if its a fad. Natural hair is beautiful and it’s nice to see it all around me. It was kinda lonely a decade ago!
lol
I got into this “Natural World” by accident. I was just tired of not finding a good stylist that could take care of my hair after having my second baby, I also got postpartum depression and that did not help. But anyways, when searching for information I got caught in between all this Drama about hair. Is it that important who got it first or who knows more?
I’m just thankful I found some information because the last time I saw my natural hair I was 14 years old. Now I’m in my mid 30s and this is so unreal for me. I appreciate all Naturals out there, old and new, that are sharing their experiences; I take what I can use and tossed what doesn’t work for me and every new Natural like me should do the same.
“Seasoned naturals do not know everything. No, we don’t. I bring this up because a couple of days ago on Facebook a poster was going OFF on natural hair bloggers, vloggers, and Youtubers for acting like they have all the answers on natural hair. They were labeled as hypocrites. I had to think about her statements a little deeper because I really wanted to grasp her anger. Where was this coming from? And why were so many agreeing with her post?”
We are consistently finding reasons to tear each other down to build ourselves up. Yes I am one of those old school naturals and I for dog on sure ain’t got this thing figured out lol. I just wish for once we could find something to unify over. I’m so over the “fight” why are we so angry and judgmental towards each other its such nonsense.
good article by the way 🙂
It’s really hurtful to see that and knowing that some women experience that with “older naturals.” This isn’t a competition and I hate that some naturals capitalize it on being a trend. It’s like they’re saying, “Oh well I went natural in 2007 when being natural wasn’t even popular, therefore I know more! Be jealous of my longer hair and my more knowledgeable brain on natural hair!”
Even sadder is that I feel like this is another way that the natural hair community is divisive in itself. Older Natural vs. Newly Natural. 3C vs. 4C (including the stigmas that go along with each hair type). Natural Nazis vs. “Freer” Naturals. The list goes on..
I loved my relaxer of 20 years but went back to natural 5 years ago. My natural journey began when I rushed a relaxer in my hair to get to an event. I felt bad and decided to give it a break. I love my textured hair, it is so me.
My only gripe is…No,you are not natural if you put texturizers in your hair. You have chemically changed the natural pattern of your hair so natural does not qualify.
Other than that, I don’t understand the venom spewing from everyone. Those that are upset that natural girls wear weaves etc., I hope you don’t wear make up or nail polish because that covers your natural skin and nails. If the hair under the weave,wigs and braids is untouched chemically than it is natural. They have just chosen to wear it covered for the moment.
So ladies yes, the hair God gave us is beautiful but because he is an awesome God he lets us choose how to wear it. Relaxed or natural lets appreciate each other and the beauty of it ALL.
you think that a woman who has texturized her hair is not natural but a woman who covers her hair with a weave is? well… there’s a place in this world for every opinion. however i agree with your last sentence
Covering your hair with weave you can still be natural underneath. Chemically altering your natural curl pattern is another story. Two COMPLETELY different things.
Interesting discussion.
I’m newly natural but have found input from newer naturals just as helpful as tips from seasoned naturals. I originally looked to the online natural hair community for the most basic tips (ie. how to detangle and moisturize my hair) and of course benefited from naturals that have been doing it forever.
Now, I love my hair and know how it responds in different circumstances and seasons. These days I am usually searching for styling tips, thoughts on products and just folks that are as excited about the flyness of natural hair as I am. These things are no more valuable from someone that is 12 years natural as someone that is 3 to me. If you’re bantu knot out techniwue is the bomb, I wanna check it out.
I don’t get the divisiveness but I am so happy for the seasoned naturals that showed us how fly our hair could be because honestly there were years where I did not know.
As human beings, why do we tend to focus on the negative? For every 10 complements that we receive about our hair, we may get one negative comment. Yet we will focus on that one negative comment and will take precious time out of our lives to write an article dedicated to that one insensitive and asinine comment. SMH
Nay, I don’t see it like that, this article was about self righteous naturals, who want tell new naturals how they should be natural. When some of the new naturals are doing it better than they are!
THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT I GOT FROM THIS ARTICLE AS WELL
That’s what I got too! And it’s interesting that most of the responses seem to be from long-time naturals doing EXACTLY what the article was complaining about.
I’ve been natural for 21 years, I cut off all of the perm when I was 19 years old. I’m glad that more women with varying types of curly hair are going natural. However, I despise the attitude that you have to “define” your curls and have long length to look good and/or be professional. We need to love our hair at ever stage of growth and how it looks when combed. I want to see more Afro acceptance among black people, plain and simple.
This article is true. I made a similar post about this last year. http://curlsofinnocence.blogspot.com/2012/12/i-was-natural-first.html
Going natural is fine and all that too, I’m proud of myself too, but females should go natural and then shut the hell up like ok big deal you’re wearing your own hair like should reward and blogs like this be written because of it, anyway sometimes I feel like going back to my dumb blonde weave or creamy crack which I never really used but at least it’s not complicated. Y’all make going natural complicated, with the what kinda hair you have 4c/3c and density test and all the 50 million products that came out, cause we wanna go natural AND all the know it all Naturals that be blogging, I see you! It’s just complicated and for me that boring, my going natural aint complicated , it’s fun, I love my new found hair, I don’t know what kinda hair I have, I use the product that works for me, I do t know what to tell nobody else about going natural, it’s self discovery, not a fad or trend, someone made it look so good that everyone else wanted to do it. So what and that’s great, so now women are embracing their real hair and giving weave a break, but quiet as its kept, somebody gonna slap weave in there again, I’m rocking braids right now, and these things itch like crazy, I love my natural hair….self discovery. Stop makings big hoopla, cause you natural, alright we get it. One
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Argh, I hate poor sentence structure, poor grammar and incoherent rambling.
That is all.
SPEAK ENGLISH
Any woman who refers to herself or other woman as “females” doesn’t have shit to say that’s worth listening.
Sit your ass down.
I became natural in 2007, I also knew nothing about a big chop or natural youtubers. The only person I knew was natural was a 65 year old lady with a twa that was fye, but wasn’t the style I was going for. I have lost about 11 to 12 inches of hair because I didn’t know I could flat iron my hair as much as when I had a relaxer, I still use pantene original shamp/cond, and it left my hair healthy and soft. Yes, their are exceptions to the rule about sulfates. Funny thing only when I tried other shampoos did I realize that as a natural I couldn’t just put any shampoo on my hair, this was just last year. I learned that it can be a waste of money to buy a 30 jar of something because it may not work better than a 4 jar of the same thing. My 4c hair doesn’t simply create styles easily as the 2 or 3c so I stop trying the hair products that work for them. My hair is to the middle of my back, long and thick. I love my hair!! I am my own natural, not defined by what others think a natural should be. Back in November 2006 after my hair was coming out in clumps, I said I’m done with perms, I knew nothing about the Big Chop, just found out a couple of years ago, that that’s what it is now called. Even though I’m almost 7 years in, I still consider myself a New Natural, because I’m versatile, I wear twists, wash and goes and straightened from time to time. Im over the naturals who are scared of heat, or comb, it didn’t hurt our hair as children. Stop trying to make being natural so deep. For my thick hair, I use a wide tooth comb and I finger detangle in the shower, but I love a wide tooth comb. If ppl keep putting these requirments on the perfect way to take care of natural hair, the man is going to beat us at our on game, by selling the new best thing for naturals. The game hasn’t change since our moms were doing our hair. Maybe a little but not much! My motto is TO THINE OWN (NATURAL) HAIR BE TRUE! Do what work for your hair. I didn’t go natural to be Pro-Black, I was already loving my heritage, I went natural, because when my hair stop loving the perm, I stopped loving the perm, simply as that! 7 years and my hair hasn’t come out in clumps again! I wish more naturals would enjoy their hair, instead of trying to reach a waste length. If you take care of your hair love it right, its going to grow anyway. Stop trying to out do the next and just enjoy your hair, its going to do what it knows how to do, stop sitting around waiting to do it. That’s why some natural get bored with their hair and cut it after it reaches their desired length. Also, I’m so over the naturals that think your only a real natural if you wear one hair style, the Fro, girl please, I’ll wear a fro when I feel like it and it will be a modern, curly like fro, and I still haven’t done it yet!!
I have been natural all my life. Out the womb. And YES, you natural newbies are annoying af! Congrats, on finally finding your new found beauty after many years of destroying it.
And PU-LEEZ DO NOT call yourself NATURAL with a full remy set, plus bang on top of your head!!! No-No Shoo-Shoo! You “may be” natural underneath but clearly you do not know how to be it 100%. And to a real natural woman, you appear ashamed of it and a big fat poser.
And they now call wearing the weave, “a protective style” =___= GTFOH! If you truly know how to care for your hair its protected all the time.
And if I hear “#TeamNatural 5 years strong” ONE MORE TIME!! omg.. Yall are annoying. Just wash your hair and have a seat.
That’s great that you’ve been natural your whole life and you may not understand what the newbies have gone through. First, many of us did not chose to wear perms/relaxers that choice was made for us. Second, when we actually learned about the alternative we decided to go that route. I don’t remember anyone being natural when I was growing so I had no point of reference.
What is so wrong someone celebrating their natural beauty!? #TEAMNATURAL 4 years strong right here! Why does our joy cause you so much anger?
Also, I wear weaves and YES I am natural! Sometimes I want to give my hair a break! So what if I wear a weave extension? Why do I need your approval just because you’ve been natural your whole life? Good for you… Who says everyone is afraid to “be real” HAAA! I have to laugh because as a woman I have options and I can express myself how I want to when I want!
I have been accused of being one of those “old school” naturals who is annoyed by SOME of the comments made by people who have more recently embraced their natural hair.
These are some of the reasons why:
1. Hair is hair. Some days it will be cute, some days it won’t. This need to beat natural hair into submission doesn’t sit well with me.
2. I don’t have curls, or coils… I have naps. Sometimes it feels as if there is an attempt to “anglo-ize” natural hair by making the best known youtubers women with looser hair, or longer hair.. still sending a message of nappy ain’t happy.
3. People have work natural hair for a LONG time, and some of the products that people swear are terrible, are not that bad! Financially, everybody does not have the means to buy $50 jars of Miss Jessies, and this idea that we need excessive products is not right, IN MY OPINION.
There are more reasons, but ultimately,it’s great that more people are embracing their natural hair.
I am 100% with you!!! Especially with #1 and #2
I have been Natural all my life and if I am being honest Natural Newbies erk me.
I have been natural all my life. Out the womb. And YES, you natural newbies are annoying af! Congrats, on finally finding your new found beauty after many years of destroying it.
And PU-LEEZ DO NOT call yourself NATURAL with a full remy set, plus bang on top of your head!!! No-No Shoo-Shoo! You “may be” natural underneath but clearly you do not know how to be it 100%. And to a real natural woman, you appear ashamed of it and a big fat poser.
And they now call wearing the weave, “a protective style” =___= GTFOH! If you truly know how to care for your hair its protected all the time.
And if I hear “#TeamNatural 5 years strong” ONE MORE TIME!! omg.. Yall are annoying. Just wash your wash and have a seat.
I’m not a new natural but even I am annoyed by this comment. It’s those who act like that who are giving us naturals a bad name. You can’t tell people who they are based on their hair and if they want to wear a weave to protect their hair (as I do from time to time) then they have the right to wear a weave if they please. Please inform me on how hair is protected all the time?
Soooo you are one of those mad heifers.
Really….this is just another division to cause women of color to bicker over non-important things. So many bigger issues in life. “I am not my hair..” Just be glad to have hair. How about women in chemo that have lost there hair? Just do whats best for your hair type and don’t sweat what people say. Life is too short to care about veteran natural vs. newbie..smh
so true
The rudeness and bitterness is most definitely not called for.Like, what was she even trying to accomplish?
I’m a seasoned natural of over 10 years. I’m glad that more women have embraced the amazing hair that God blessed with and rock it with pride. It’s not this “political movement” that’s changing world though. You’re just finally rocking wonderful locks God gave you. I will say that it does get annoying when people try to classify what is natural and what isn’t, like what’s all the judgment for? Because you became natural you have classify other people. Come on…lets just play nice.
As someone who has been natural almost all my life, I’ve learnt alot from the current movement. I personally think that the Internet spurred the new popularity of natural hair. Those with the same interests easily find each other online. Before the internet people struggled and experimented alone.
Before the advent of the movement I would braid my own hair every week. Slapping grease on dry hair…and combing it like that. I was one of those girls who style hair for others from home for some pocket money, like braids and cornrows. But I didn’t know about sealing in moisture, low manipulation, protective styling etc…I learnt those things from Nappturality when I finally got an Internet connection in 2004.
I notice everything nowadays has a name and definition. And there are so many products it’s sometimes overwhelming. After years of experimenting I’ve become an expert on my hair. This makes it easy to decide whether a blogger’s or vlogger’s technique will work for me.
Pa************@***il.com spelling error for my email address.
This article has definitely blessed my soul….I truly gave up asking for help from people who say they are experienced, and can help you, but yet there seems to be a catch to it, a loophole if you will. One example, this person actually implied that if I didn’t say I was jealous of her hair or admit I had hair envy that I was just being phony…and I thought to myself if I did not love her hair I would not follow her blog or pay for her services. Which will never happen again…..I’ve had several problems like this in the past so no more seeking advice from people. I do my own research and make my own products. It’s all about trial and error. Thank you for this post……I will let it role off my chest and keep it moving….tired of supporting people by buying their product and ask them a question and they ignore you…..peace Pam
I love all the guys and gals going natural. Especially as an African American in at a predominately white university it’s heart warming to see all the fros around campus. The only thing that bothers me is going natural is more of a popular trend then an actual choice. I just want to see how many women stay natural.
Credit where credit is due. I first thought seriously about going natural back in 97 but it took finding the online community 10 years later to give me the courage to actually do it. I can see why someone who stuck it out back then might be a little resentful now. Still, ask yourself why did you do it in the first place? Were you really just looking for props? Or did you want to stay true to yourself? If it’s something like the latter and you achieved that, why you mad sis?
I so agree with your comment. Like I said I had a perm for 28 years, and never once let it rest from it. I knew many in and outside my family who had natural hair. They ould press and flat iron it so hard you thought they had a pem. What I saw from young people was the will o break free from all of the damage. They had the energy and boldness, much like the afro movement in the 70’s.
At the time I went natural I had not went to the Internet to see what was happening. However, when I realized I was in trouble, and people asking me what the heck I was doing. Need I say I ran to the Internet, bloggers. Young people had me throwing out old products and mixing and matching, lol. It was a crazy ride and I was loving it!! Lol my hair wa loving.
The only bad thing that happen to me, if you want to call it bad. Lol every family membe ent natural ( no pressing , taking off the wigs, and weaves) and wanted me to how them how. I was selfish with my products and time. Lol so I sent the to those bold young people on Youtube, so they could experience what was happening for themselves, and learn the hair codes and lingo. For a long ime I did not know what Cowash was. I thought it was a typo and thy meant go wash. Lol lol
No real side eyes only from people who don’t get what natural hair is all about. Some of the best compliments have come from non-blacks. I think it is great more people are going natural, but some seem to want to constantly define for ME what natural and being natural is hahhahah. I think it is a good thing…more should go or return to natural.
Being natural is trial and error until you find what works for you. The hair bloggers, vloggers and YouTubers are just showing what they do and tips they have picked up. So why get mad.
You hit the hammer on the head with this comment.
I agree a lot of the ladies I follow via You Tube and blogs simply share what works best for their natural hair. A lot of new naturals and even veteran naturals learn from some of them. The ladies I follow do not claim to know it all. I’ve come across some natural hair dressers that throw shade at the bloggers and You Tube ladies who share their natural hair care tips. Some of them seem to be upset with the natural hair information provided online. I think it is great that women are learning how to do their own hair and not rely on someone. The tutorials on You Tube are very helpful for those who cannot afford to get the hair done all the time. On the other hand, there are some great and knowledgeable natural hair dressers out there doing a great job. I think the natural hair dressers and You Tube ladies and bloggers should join forces. It would be good for business 🙂
http://ammamama.wordpress.com/
Seriously, lol, 3 comments from old naturals and the 100 + old timers who thumbed them up speaks to EXACTLY the type of attitude the author addresses. WTF are some of them so angry? It’s as if some are pissed off that they didn’t get credit for being trail blazers. Why so much anger at new naturals learning from each other? Is it because the “infinite wisdom” of these old timers are being ignored or is it just plain cattiness?
I’ve been natural since ’97. Who remembers the book “Good Hair” by Lonnice Bonner ? I have two other friends who have basically been natural since then. I don’t think there is much shade, I am happy to see black women embrace their hair. It is annoying that some younger folks, think they invented it 🙂 But I guess that’s what young people do 🙂
Here is where the problem is “going OFF on natural hair bloggers, vloggers, and Youtubers”. They are watch, & reading to many sites. It’s called, information overload. Then you become confused and angry at the advice. Why? Because differnt products , and techniques work for different people, but in their mind they think the blogger is a know it all.
Pick a few sites ( I like this one a lot! ) one that has a variety of textures. Use what you can and throw the rest away. I had a perm for 28 years. I had no clue what to do or put on my hair. I could not get enough info. Lol I was like a sponge. It’s been 4 years and I’m still learning. The proof is in the health of my hair.
With any information, use a sound mind. Enjoy!
THANK YOU!!! for this. I wish I could thumbs-up x100!
I just commented on here the other day how by watching a woman’s “unicorn braids” video I learned a new way to do a style I’ve been doing for years. Since I took my locs out in 2007 I’ve learned a LOT of cool new tricks from the new naturals and I learned ALL of them via the Internet. For that alone I am GRATEFUL for their contributions.
However…Not only did I go natural before it became popular, I was on the Internet talking about hair before it became popular. 🙂 And based on some of the conversations I see today I am even more grateful that I went natural when I did. What we have now is a combination of too much conflicting information and a lack of discernment. Two examples:
1) The vast majority of bloggers/vloggers participating online are only experts in how they care for their OWN HAIR…yet I regularly see people asking them questions that they should be asking a (gasp) stylist or (double-gasp) a medical doctor. Why would you ask someone like Jess of MahoganyCurls (just to name one example) about your hair loss situation if she hasn’t gone through it herself? And Jess is one of the more responsible vloggers IMO…how many new naturals who lacked the common sense to question some of these less responsible bloggers/vloggers want to be mad at “seasoned naturals” now?
2) As someone who studies history and has always been interested in the evolution of black beauty and self-image over time, I find it fascinating and completely unsurprising that many of of the more popular bloggers/vloggers have hair textures that are still considered “good hair” even today. Consequently — and again this is what happens when you take the Internet at face value — people are applying what they see from these particular folks to the entire natural hair “movement” and interpreting it as a dominant “good hair” narrative. And now that the Internet is more visual than ever, it’s very easy to see how some naturals end up checking out (ie. going back to the perm/weave) because they (think they) see that they don’t “belong.”
Here’s the thing though. They DO belong…we ALL belong…the newbies and the oldies, the 3as and the 4cs, all of us. The larger, grander natural hair narrative should be that we are deprogramming ourselves from beauty images that were never meant to serve us and learning to love and accept our unique physical selves from the roots of our hair follicles to the very tips of our toenails. When it comes to achieving this goal, the Internet can help as well as hinder. That’s why discernment is absolutely critical.
My $0.02 as a seasoned natural and “Netizen”…
I first went natural in 2006, and I have to agree that at the time there was very little info out there. Nappturality.com was my favorite go-to source for styling, hair care and everything else!
I am so glad that newly natural women have more resources and information than we did back then. We’re all learning with each other! With Youtube, blogging, and natural websites in full effect, everyone has an endless supply of information at any point in their natural journey.
I’m so proud of the progress that the natural community has made. We are so diverse and beautiful!
I’ve been natural since the day I was born and during my life I’ve seen my hair be hip length and then cut it to shoulder length, which I have now. All I can say to those who have recently turned natural is to embrace the journey and have fun.
One thing I don’t like about some ‘new’ naturals is how they try to tell you what to put on your head and try to classify what is natural and what isn’t. Im not trying to be mean, but dontvgive me any advice if your hsir has been twa for 3 years. Some of you are coming up with to many rules and don’t seem to know that everybody hair is different so just because someone has the same texture as you doesn’t mean you can do what they do. I also hate it how some of y’all can’t embrace one another being natural and instantly say that a girls edges or ends are bad.
ITA, with everything you’ve said. You have been natural far longer than me, but I still have 11 years in the game. NOTHING was out there, but Nappturality, Roshini (now Glamazini), MotownGirl and a few Sisterloc blogs. I BC’ed in 2002. Wore my hair loose for 4 years and have had locs for the rest of the time.
It’s the folks who are 6 months in who think they know EVERYTHING about natural hair AND feel they need to give folks who have done it for YEARS advice, that give me pause. Not saying old heads know everything either, but honestly, if you are just getting the hang of managing your own hair, how are you going to give me any advice? It’s like, “CHILL.” lol.
Thank you Ma! Your so right, I don’t have to wear a afro that looked like I just had a electrical shock, to prove I’m natural. I was natural until I was 14, my mom wash and pressed my hair and my hair was to the middle of my back until I started getting perms. Perms, stunt the growth or maybe the shedding, either way, its does grow as much as when your natural. After a decade of perms I’ve been natural now for almost 7 years, since 11/06. I MADE THE DECISION TO GO NATURAL W/O KNOWING ANYTHING ABOUT BEING A NATURAL ADULT. Its one thing when your mom is taking care of your hair and another as a adult. The only person I knew that was natural was a 65 year old woman with a tiny winny fye afro, not my thing but hers was smooth, cut and trimmed and looked very healthy. After my last perm my hair was coming out in clumps. I looked in the mirror and just thought theirs no purpose in crying its gone. I literally made up my mind at that moment that I was done with perms. Only a couple years ago, I saw on youtube that what I did that day (cutting the perm out of my hair in 06) was called the “BIG CHOP”. I didn’t know how much to mimimize heat in my hair, I still flat ironed, because I only thought perms for me, where the enemy. I still don’t cowash (thinking about trying it), didn’t know anything about not using sulfates, because I was using pantene original sham/cond that made my hair soft, don’t know why though. Because last year when I tried other shampoos those sulfates where harsh to say the least, on my hair. I’ve tried styles that work well for 3 type hair an make me look like a fool with my 4c hair, I learned that, you have to learn your own hair. With perms a lot products work for different hair types, it doesn’t work that way with naturals. I’ve lost about 11 or 12 inches of hair in the 7 years of being natural because I was clueless as an adult of how to take care of natural hair, and yes I wanted to kick myself. Had I known my hair would be on my butt today, but its to the middle of my back. That’s the thing about 4c hair it can be fragile but it grows like grass, and mine is thick as a lions. Though I could kick myself for my mistakes, at least when I have daughters I know how to take care of theirs and I can give good advice now to other new naturals. As well my motto is TO THINE OWN (NATURAL) HAIR BE TRUE… Don’t waste time buying products that leave your wallet empty and your hair looking no better than a 4 dollar product, I had to learn that also. Don’t let anyone else define your natural, natural for me is relaxer free, no matter if I’m wearing a wash and go, twist outs or I straighten it. Some ppl think your only natural if you were a afro, well I don’t need a afro to be Pro-Black. When I do wear one it will be fye, a little curly, the way I like, though, I’ve been natural 7 years, I call myself the New Natural, because my hair is versatile, Im not limited by one style! Do you because this natural sure will be doing me! I love to see naturals, I saw a little girl about 7, who had huge twists, and they were very natural and soft looking at the same time! Love being natura!
Exhibit A.
So you’re telling me some of those awful new naturals ordered you to use a certain product/technique OR did they simply SHARE advice based on THEIR experiences? Did they force feed you advice against your will?
GTFO
No, but when you’ve been told by a girl who turned natural 3 months ago or a naturals who’s hair has been twa for 5 years that a comb doesn’t make you natural, long hair is trying to be white, or weave breaks your hair (it’s how I got to hip length with no breakage). Then I have a problem. Don’t tell someone who’s been natural since the day they were born or before it became a trend what they should do or shouldn’t do with their hair. I’m okay with your advice hear and there, but don’t tell me what makes you natural or not.