by
Black Girl With Long Hair
Reader Kayana (not pictured above) says;
I know that many naturals figure out their hair pretty quickly, and have grown out full, long, healthy heads of hair in no time. But I’m in a different group of naturals; those of us you struggle for years to figure out how to properly retain length. I’ve been tweaking my protective strategy for 5 (count’em… FIVE) years, and now — at age 26 — I’m FINALLY seeing results. Just yesterday I was watching TV and felt something weird brushing the base of my neck and, who’d a thunk, it was MY HAIR. That was definitely new. For me, the issue is that my hair is very, very fine, very thin (as in, not dense), and highly textured. And, while I love my hair and wouldn’t trade it for anyone else’s, figuring out how to keep length in the unforgiving terrain that is my hair, has been difficult.
I guess the purpose of this post is two-fold — to make the natural hair world AWARE that we exist! I sometimes feel that people take for granted that every natural will have a nice, big, healthy, fluffy afro in 2 years. That’s not the case! Mastery of one’s hair is sometimes very difficult. It used to bum me out, but now I affectionately refer to myself as a ‘late bloomer’. This experience has taught me patience, and once my hair hits 12 inches, I plan on starting a YouTube channel to encourage and inspire women who are struggling, like I was.
I also gain inspiration from hair gurus like Teri of Tightly Curly and Kim Love of KimmayTube who are open and up-front about the fact that it took them more than a decade to figure out how to grow out their hair.
Also, I was just curious to see if there was any one else out there like me. Did it take you years to figure out how to retain length? Is it TAKING you years? And what are some things you’ve learned about your hair along the way?
Great questions! And for those of you who had a fairly quick journey, length-retention-wise, do you have friends or family who struggle a bit more than you did?
61 Responses
Thanks for another informative website. Where else could I get that type of info written in such a perfect way? I’ve a project that I am just now working on, and I’ve been on the look out for such info.
Another fine haired natural here…I really don’t have a major regimen. I wash, condition, twist and braid my hair regularly. It has grown from @ one inch to neck length in 1 and 1/2 yrs. I’ll just keep doing this as long as it keeps growing. I use mostly EVOO/shea butter and Shea Moisture products. For me this is more fun and easier than wearing a chemical straightener.
I have been natural for 3 years and it has been a major roller coaster for me. I just figured it would be easy…NOT! LOL I became a major product junkie, watched countless YT Vids, read every article, book, blog…and mixed every concoction known to man. You name it I did it 🙂 My hair still broke off, was dry and unmanageable. I am now on a quest to get it right. I never documented my progress nor did I keep my ends trimmed as they should be. I am learning now that int he winter my routine needs to be tweaked. I need to moisturize more and watch the PH balance in my products (thanks kimmaytube and Michelle George :-))
So I am on what I am calling a Re-journey that I am documenting on paper and on YT (http://www.youtube.com/user/ImANaturalGirl). My length goal is shoulder length…and in the process I hope to learn what my hair likes, gain a much healthier head of hair and gain better physical healthWish me luck!
okay the key to length retention is detangling and deep treatments at least twice a week. Also moisturizing with a light oil and some water is critical. Satin caps & pillowcases & don’t be afraid to put some braids in for visible retention. NOT micro braids but some kinky twists, a full weave (curly, natural of course) or some cornrows for 2 months and you’ll see results. I’ve got very thin, curly, breakable, dry hair and this works. Also simple products:olive oil, coconut oil, and pure aloe vera gel & water water water. Shampoo: shea moisture (moisture retention shampoo) & conditioner & deep treatment masque. I only use shea moisture & natural products. It takes work everyday and low manipulation styles.
I too feel like I am in the minority. I have been natural for seven years. But my hair is not long at all you would think that it would be down to my back by now. My main issue is that I am on heavy medication, which truly effects the growth of ones hair. I do get disappointed at times. But I try to keep the faith, especially now that I am the lower end of my medication doses and really feel like it’s time for me to bloom. Good luck to all the late bloomers!
So glad I found this!
It took me far too many years to figure out length retention and it was only by discovering Kimmay that I finally cracked it. When I had locks I started from bald and in 2 and a half years had shoulder length hair, when I cut them off and had free hair my hair would never reach past my nose I didn’t realise it was caused by breakage, I thought it was my natural hair length even though my hair grew in locks. If nobody had explained it I would be in the same cycle now.
My sister has always had long flowing shoulder length hair I thought it was because her hair was softer than mine but it was because she is a bore and always tucked her hair away whilst I burnt, coloured and generally destroyed my hair at every opportunity. I never thought to copy my sister’s style.
Now that I do protective styling I can see that my sister had the right attitude, I don’t think she realised either why her hair grew so long it was just luck that due to her mind blowingly boring personality, her hairstyles reflect her character that’s for sure.
My main goal since I decided to do my hair myself (I’ve been natural all my life but I decided to take it out of abusive hands) is to make it healthy.
Length would be nice but I think that comes with the health and you can make the decision or whether you want that or not.
I love Kim Love because she goes into the science of our hair and that’s two of my favorite things put together. Understanding it is key to a beautiful head of hair.
Hey Imoni
Don’t give up sweetie…As with everything it takes time…What you can do however, pick an hour where you can surf the net and write on a piece of paper…Cleansing/Conditioning/Moisturizing & Sealing/Styling…Then surf different suggestion that financially you can cope with…like a cheap suggestion VO5 Moisture Milks Conditioners which are like a buck or less…This is versatile for a co-wash/cleansing, add mayo and some olive oil to it and its a deep conditioner, then add the conditioner with water and its instantly a moisturizer for everyday.
Thanks so much, will do!
Hell yea!
My hair is still a piece of work that I’m trying to figure out. I was natural for 3 years (since ’08) and I’ve been struggling ever since. I always relied on my mother and sisters to help me out and advise me on what is best for my hair. Once I went off to college I managed well with my small afro and it grew…but I remember the day sooo clearly when I washed my hair and it felt like a brilo pad. After that I struggled (and still struggle to figure out what’s best for my hair).
Another thing that doesn’t help is that it is very hard for me to stick with a “natural hair regimen”. I go to school for fashion design and the majority of the time all (sometimes getting up 6am and coming home 4am….yes…4AM during the school year) my energy is in that. There are days where I won’t sleep trying to finish projects and my hair is untouched from previous twist outs and it dries up. I don’t have time to tend to my hair every night nor the money. I often cheat and put kinky twists in so I don’t have to deal with it. I don’t have steady income because I’m a full-time student; I rely on my parents for money. So eating healthy, proper hair care ect. are sadly second in my life and I just have to use what I have or what’s given to me.
My best friend went natural about a little less that 1 year ago. She did “the big chop”….(more like “the big shave”) and her hair surpassed mine in length and thickness! (0.0) I was shocked and of course jealous! The same thing with all these people on YouTube whose hair grows significantly within 2yrs or less. But I know I have no one to blame but myself. Caring for myself, hair, body, skin, diet, is a big time commitment I know I have to make. But I feel it’s just to difficult while I’m in school. I dearly want to commit to my hair and watch it prosper but it definitely takes time and paying close attention to.
(-____-” *sigh*
(I think I just ranted more than commented…)
Great post!! My curly fro is almost 3yrs old and is 4a/b and kind of thin. In the beginning it seemed like my hair grew like crazy. But I really didn’t get that my kinky twists, extra long conditioning sessions, and protein treatments were not my friends until the last time I removed my kinky twists and wondered “why is my hair not maturing like some of my friends”. So I began researching porosity and protein issues, looking really closely at the products I have now and have used before, and keeping foremost in my mind that this is my hair, not anyone else’s! Not sure if I’m on the right path but I’ve started back dating my hair!
fine, dense, 4b/4c hair here! it was only after i started doing protein treatments (once a month), moisturizing every OTHER day,and putting my hair in protective styles 80% of the time that i was able to retain length. I also have very sensitive skin and my scalp needs a light acv treatment every other week or else itching, sores, scabbing grossssssss.
this summer my hair will be in yarn braids..maybe even though the fall and winter…I hope hope hope to get better at doing them because i can leave my hair alone for weeks at a time which is what it NEEDS.
Fine hair means make no mistakes! so, leaving my hair in a protective style for 5 weeks means less chances to slip up.
Absolutely with you. I started transitioning in 2007 and I’m just finding some length retention. I’ve never had long hair, so it wasn’t really a priority but since I’ve helped convince other friends to go natural and watched them grow big fluffy fros and long spirals while I’m at the same neck length, I’m getting a little jealous.
My hair is fine and has always been super delicate. At the same time, I have no patience for sticking to one look or regimen. So I could never keep the hair I grew when I tried something new. I’m super quick to cut my hair when it acts the slightest bit unruly.
I’ve learned along the way that wash-n-gos cause too many ssks and splits once my hair is past the TWA stage. CHOP. Can’t press in the summer. CHOP. Too much protein makes my hair too nappy and unmanageable for any manipulation. CHOP. One random cheap flatiron will permanently straighten my hair. CHOP. All haircolor fades to the same blah reddish brown. CHOP. My hair grows faster in the back than the sides and I don’t like a mullet. CHOP.
What’s working for me now: Semi-stretched styles, no/low-sulfate shampoos, aloe, coconut, and shea butter-based products, little heat, regular trims (I trim every 2-3 mths), no color (*pouts), re-moisturize between washes. And also just sticking to a routine/style for as long as possible to minmize manipulation and make it easier to identify when I’ve done something wrong/right.
I recently went to a Dominican stylist and had a deep conditioning treatment and trim. I don’t know what products she used (Dominican, I’m assuming) but three at home washes later and my hair is still silky soft and smooth. I credit both the treatment and trim for reducing the amount of combing and finger combing I need to detangle and style my hair now, which translates to less manipulation and less breakage. I have already noticed a huge difference in the amount of hair in the shower and bathroom floor. I think regular deep conditioning and trimming will play a big part in my length retention.
Took me 8 years to figure it out…as soon as I did, I knew I was ready to LOCK IT UP. I have simlar hair to you, with the exception that it is VERY dense and fine fine fine, and nappy. 😀
WOW! That article spoke directly to me. I went natural in ’06 and am loving it. But it’s taken me FOREVER and a day to figure out how to moisturize, detangle, find and keep my curl pattern, style etc. Just recently I found out how to properly wash my hair and I have also realized I don’t really need a comb to do my hair at all. I barely need a brush. Long story short, I thought I just wasn’t gettin it seeing all these ladies on bglh and youtube who had their system down. And here I was going through product after product and technique after technique and comin up short. Thanks for the post girlie!!
+1!
I never could get my head around brushing my hair especially with a denman, I could imagine by hair coming out in chunks! I also never liked combing really, the snagging and snapping of my strands upset me so now I just finger comb and detangle and my hair seems happier.
Amen!
I understand you so much! I actually just created a blog about my hair rentention problem. I’ve managed to grow other peoples hair, but neglect to follow the same regimen.
My hair has pretty much stayed the same length for 3 years. I’ve watched AND HELPED all my friends go natural and retain length to midback while I’m still stuck at my ear and chin..:(. It takes a while to stop experimenting and just listen to your hair!
watch my progress: texturedcaring.blogspot.com
When my hair is unbound, I become its worst enemy. I don’t mean to, I just do. I Keep forgetting that I can’t get a comb through it all at once, not even when it’s optimally moisturized, and the drier it is, the harder it becomes to manage. Having these fine, variably coily strands be dense and highly porous makes for a mess of hair that may look good when I wear a fro but can’t be worn unbound for very long. I have learned that I dare not leave the ends unbound for sleeping, not even in a pineapple.
Now that it’s shoulder-length, I’ve begun to secure the ends at night even when my hair is plaited or twisted. To moisturize it, I’ll have to take it down if it’s already bound from the night before. This will keep the ends stretched. For my twists especially, this will keep them from tangling around each other, which they’re prone to do once they start unraveling.
Having the plaits for nearly a year has done a lot to help me retain length. Now that I’m twisting it instead of plaiting it, I hope to continue to retain length, especially since the twists go in very easily, and the takedown is far less traumatic than with plaits, even when the plaits are loose. Now if I can just get that exact set of products that give me moisture without tack and buildup . . . but I suppose that’s why cleansing is necessary, right :-)?
And if there is a product that will help it be moisturized and soft while it is unbound, I’d like that, too, please!
Thank you so much for asking this question. I am in the same boat you are. Do you know how discouraging it is to watch some who BC’d a year ago post updates with hair longer than yours??
When I first started my HJ, long hair was my only goal. Now that I’ve actually learned how to do my hair, I’m content with my shoulder length (after 4 years) hair.
I’ve also started watching a variety on YT. I balance the superstarts with sisters in the struggle:)
I BC’d when my son was born. On his fourth birthday, I had 6 inches! Yah, that’s right: 4 years, 6 inches. Bummed! That was last fall. In the past 6 months, I figured out that my hair was always dry and I comb/brush it too much. So now I finger- comb, but minimally, and water touches it daily. Already, I’m seeing an improvement, but I’m still not there. I’m battling the dryness and oils are not really working for me.
Yes, watching the thick-haired women got frustrating after a while. I’ve started specifically looking for those with very course hair, like mine. If I saw a lot of curls, I moved on. They’re out there!
The saga continues…
No, it never took much effort for my hair to grow out. I used to think it was b/c my dad has very loosely curled hair. But, now that I’m well-informed, I know it has nothing to do with curl pattern, but the thickness of my strands, their porosity and elasticity. My mom’s hair has a tighter curl pattern, but more importantly it’s strands are very fine. Her hair doesn’t get past SL/APL. When we followed the same regimen, I was BSL. So, yes…I’d say those who have fine strands compounded with a tighter curl pattern may have to play around with protein, moisture, oils and protective styles in order to grow their hair more easily. But once that elixir is found, beautiful, thick hair is on the way!
Well I am in that boat too but my boyfriend says he notices some length now. So I looking at what I am doing differently. Here what I discovered. Plain Jane jumbo twists. Wash with of course SLS free shampoo because my hair is extremely dry naturally and winter weather. Seal ends with silicons or heavey oils. Leave moisturizing conditioner in don’t rinse out. ACV (or cold water when ACV is not available) and Oil rinse each washing day. Fully Detangle when moist not wet and not dry crucial. Seal with oil I have notice that petroleum oil seams to work well.
Key points:
Petroleum only for the strands NOT the roots, it has been suggested the petroleum on skin can clog pores and clog pore can thin out hair strands. But it must be noted that it is considered the best sealant available and one of the least irritating substances for topical applications. So use wisely. I use it on my hair to make it moisture last longer especially during dry weather and also because hair doesn’t have pores.
Dilute ACV (Apple Cider Vinegar) with 1 part water to 1 part ACV or 2parts water to 1 part ACV. If your scratch your scalp (especially before your wash) then don’t use this rinse you will burn tender skin.
ACV rinse is used to smooth down cuticles which promotes shines, makes it easier to detangle, and provides better separation results if you are going to do out styles. ACV also helps in controlling dandruff but it supposed to be applied to scalp at least every three days I don’t know full details but info can be found online.
Oil rinse (I use extra virgin olive oil because it cheap, and is not chemically treated like regular olive oil) is good assisting in preventing single strand knots, makes detangling a little easier and can help seal in moisture that can be lost due to shampooing. I tend to this rinse before the ACV rinse because your supposed rinse it out with warm water and and ACV rinse works better with cool-cold water warm-hot water can be counter productive to ACV rinse or or cold water rinse.
I am a slow grower with thin hair. It can be depressing at times because what works for others don’t work for me. I swear I can just look at my hair and sometimes some strands will break. *sigh* I am on a complete DIY mission looking for the right blend of products that work for my hair.
I would like to encourage Kayana to start a YouTube channel now to help others like her while she is still learning. Let us see your mourn struggles and celebrate in your successes! Don’t put up vids after the fact.
Glad to see this article. I thought I was alone. My hair seems to be stuck at one length. Sometimes, though I am happy for others,looking at other folks progress can be a bit discouraging. I’ve been natural 2 years and I am still learning my hair. I plan to leave it be this summer. Not a lot of styling. Use the products I know keep it moisturized and hope it gets to a length that protective styling will be easier.
I must say this is one article that I truly appreciate. I have been natural for a little over 3 years, and I was always amazed how fast some people hair would grow compared to mine. I have always been a fan of using conditioner for moisture but that is far as I went for the most part. I had to learn the hard way that my hair cannot survive on condition along for moisture it requires additional moisture especially on color treated hair. Also I have just mastered detangling which is very important in retaining length.
My hair started thriving and retaining length just three months ago (about 6 months since I started my healthy hair journey).
I have found that I do not seem to be retaining length during my transition. My hair is growing, but the length of the new growth doesn’t seem to match the length my whole hair has grown by. Unless my shrinkage is just unbelievable??
One of the things I learned is that I’m extremely heavy handed – I handle everything very rough. I didn’t have a problem with my hair growing, since it grows very fast,it was just that I’m not a patient person, WITH ANYTHING- so I learned a lot about myself and how i do things. I would tug on the hair and because I wasn’t gentle with it I would unnecessarily lose hair, even in detangling and everything else I would drag on the hair. So I’m still in the process learning to be extremely gentle with my hair, and not to do it when I’m in a hurry. I was more in tune with my hair, I felt when something was missing that my hair needed, when the product I was using needed more slip or it wasn’t quite what my hair needed. I also knew that my hair loved water,& when the ends need to be cut – because I couldn’t get anything through it at all and also that it loves to be manipulated, or it would become a huge mess on my head.
Getting a hair trim on a regular basis is important too. Less fragile ends mean less damage while washing and styling, etc., which leads to greater retention.
hm interesting I never knew that. Well it seems to make sense, do you have a certain time that you cut? Or is it whenever you think your ends are in need of it?
HI Chimmy, I notice that my thin strands are in need of a trim every 8-10 weeks. If I go longer than that I see more breakage throughout my hair. A delicate trim of about 1/4 inch is barely noticable in terms of styling and the ‘look of length’, but it makes a world of difference in terms of the health and condition of my hair.
I think a BIG part of retaining length is honestly leaving your hair alone. I mean that in so far as avoiding the constant styling that some people do. I actually found protective styling to be my enemy. In the beginning, TOO MUCH protective styling and manipulation of the strands (i.e. twisting the hair all the time, etc.) led to breakage for me. Now I mess with my hair on a minimal scale. And once it’s styled (normally just out or in a puff) I leave it alone. The results of this have been phenomenal!
I did have a set back at about 10 months and had to get 2+ inches cut off do to the damage of over-manipulation. Then I moved on and have done MUCH better since then– just by making sure my hair is moisturized and, leaving it alone. I haven’t measured my hair lately b/c I don’t really stress over that. But now, when straightened, it touches the small of my back. I have been natural for about 18 months. I started with 3 inches of hair.
So far, so good…We will see how long it lasts. I had a HORRIBLE time retaining length while I was relaxed though. That’s the main reason I went natural!
HTH!
HGHG
Good job girl! I can’t leave my hair out in a puff for too long. I learned that the hard way because although you are not manipulating it, not manipulating it by keeping it from snagging on the rest of the hair is bad. At least for me it was. I did the same thing, moisturize and seal whenever I felt I needed it, when I decided to wear a puff for 2 weeks 🙁 Come wash day, all heck broke lose and I had a matted, knotted mess. So because of that set back I’m not wearing any out styles for uhm, maybe forever lol. Special occasions I guess I will wear my hair out lol.
Wow 2 weeks straight of wearing a puff, does seem like it would cause a lot of tension on the hair. I typically alternate between wearing a wash n go for a couple of days then will wear a puff for a couple of days. I wash & detangle about every 4 days bc it looks frizzy if I wait any longer….
This conversation is very eye-opening for me: After 15 years of being natural I realize that I’ve basically returned to a simplified version of my original regimen. I have fine-but-dense, coily/kinky mostly 4b hair.
I can divide my natural hair life into 8 distinct periods that differ primarily according to the amount of styling and manipulation I was doing. The longest period lasted 5.5 years and consisted of me doing just about everything to my natural hair with the exception of color. In 5.5 years — during which I never took off more than an inch of hair at any given sitting; in fact starting at about year 3 I ONLY dusted — my hair never got past 9 inches. It’s worth noting that this period also coincides with my discovery of an online natural hair community…
Prior to that period, though? I did very little to my hair. When it got long enough to twist, I’d wear twistouts, moisturizing them lightly every day until they went back to ‘fro and then I’d start over. 11 months after my first BC (in which my hair was cut to about 1/2 inch) I got my hair flat-ironed and learned that I’d grown close to 6 inches in that 11 months.
My last BC was in March 2010; I’ve been growing it out since October 2010. I only just gave myself a small trim last week. My only style is the WNG/shrunken ‘fro; I’m not even doing twistouts anymore.
My hair history has shown me that I retain the most length when I leave my hair alone as much as possible. At the same time I refuse to obsess over length, which is why seeing my ‘fro get bigger is often a nice surprise. I also feel like I’ve sowed my wild style oats, so to speak…I’m not compelled to try different styles anymore. Ironically, if I keep this up, by this time next year I may have my longest hair ever…even though I’ll probably be the only one who notices.
Thanks SO much for sharing your hair story, LBell!
I seriously thought I was failing at being natural because I hadn’t figured what worked for my hair in almost a year. Wow, I guess I can’t complain. I just started really listening to it’s likes/dislikes while consciously trying different products, different ways of applying products…even the type of water I used and now things are turning around. Yeah, I discovered a major, major problem was the hard water in my area…it has made a huge difference…
Anyway, this post is so encouraging..I love BGLH!
Rayna, your style challenged comment totally brings a smile to my face. I never ever thought in a million years that I would ever be able to put extensions in my hair, currently now I am rocking some yarn twists that I did all by my lonesome. Honestly this was a complete surprise for me. I bc’d in december of 2010 and since then I’ve done soooo much to my hair that I’m very surprised I still have hair on my head.
My retention is not that amazing,(due to doing too much) I reached shoulder length but that’s pretty bad since it’s been months. It should be much longer.I started at about 4.5 inches so yeah… Anyways you can do it Rayna. It just finally clicked for my when I watched a video by msVcharles on youtube about installing yarn braids. Before that I saw a video on the silk scarf method of doing a braid out. I put two and two together and it just finally clicked lol. I made mine super long because I have missed getting to put my hair in a pony, also because I didn’t want the twists to place too much strain on my real hair. I wanted to gather it nice and gentle. I’m hoping to have massive growth this summer, because I’m just going to keep putting my hair in yarn twists all summer.
same here i’ve messed with my hair sooo much and sooo roughly that my scalp is now super sensitive, my head is sort of sore alot now which is…pretty scary…
Do not get me started on the scalp issues. I become so angry when I have sores on my scalp. I was thinking the other day, when I was relaxed I never got these sores unless I just got a fresh relaxer. Then I thought further about the issue and the truth of the matter is that when I was relaxed I never even thought about my hair. I let it be wild and limp lol and never payed attention to whether my scalp was feeling bad unless I had gotten a fresh relaxer.
Anyways, I noticed that I am a bit tender on some parts of my scalp. I never thought I would ever be “tender-headed” lol. I have to be super careful not to let the teeth of the clamps I use to secure my hair when I style touch my scalp. If it does I notice that pretty soon I have a sore there.
Another thing to watch out for is maybe doing an overnight dc,You can unintentionally give yourself a fungus infection which can then cause sores. I hate leaving DCs on all night, but sometimes I do, next thing I know I have sores. If this happens the trusty ACV rinse will help, also some wonderful Tea Tree Oil.
Another thing I found was that if my usual remedies don’t work, work with a really good balancing shampoo and conditioner. As soon as I finished rinsing out the conditioner from my hair and scalp, omfg the sore spots magically disappeared.
These are my remedies to the sore scalp, also maybe do a gentle massage with oils that are known to help heal. I don’t have dandruff issues, so I’m so surprised about the soreness issues. The biggest contributor for that definitely is mechanical, so I can help stop that easy. Well sort of, I have quite the heavy hand.
Omg! I never thought that doing overnight dc’s may cause fungal infections. In fact now I’m thinking about it my worst itchies came after using Ojon restorative treatment overnight. My hair would be super soft but after 2 days my scalp would be on fire 🙁
I never thought about the hair clamps irritating the scalp. Thanks for your post!
Thanks for the post,it confirm what I noticed few weeks ago about my scalp. I decided to follow the instructions on my DC jar now for safety.
OMDZ! This is it! I have a section in the middle of my head where my scalp is very sore. Reading your reply I realise it is because I treat that area very rough. it is in the middle so I cant c what im doing and so i pull it more. Oh no 🙁
I bc’ed almost two years ago, and wearing two stranded twists for a couple months at a time in addition to keeping my hair moisturised has worked wonders for me. right now my hair is the longest it’s ever been due to keeping it in twists (which I do myself,and have perfected the method over time :D) Yes, I’m excited to see the growth at the end of summer too!…Now I have to check out yarn twists. May be a new look me
Yes! another fine AND thin natural. I sometimes feel we are a rarity because most of the natural hair gurus have thick or dense hair and can afford to make mistakes, whereas us fine haired naturals have to treat our hair like the fine silk that it is.
Girl preach! And the thing that frustrates me — and this is NOT to hate on these gurus — but people ‘ooh’ and ‘aah’ over their hair, not realizing that GENETICALLY many of these women just have STRONG hair. So if you’re a natural with very fine (read=breaks at the slightest touch) hair, then these gurus might not be the best source of advice. Many of them have been able to grow long hair DESPITE their mistakes, and even while continuing to make mistakes. I need advice from someone who, like me, pays the price EVERY SINGLE TIME I make a mistake.
I’ve been natural 6 years, and just hit the 9 inch mark on my longest strands. About 1 inch of growth has come in just the past month because, like the OP, I’ve been tweaking my hair regimen for a long time.
It got to the point where I stopped looking at Fotki albums and YouTube videos for a while because they’re juts too misleading.
Naturals with fine and thin hair need a little subcommunity for themselves, because I feel there are few true gurus for us to reference.
Teesha I agree with you although I also do think that people with thick ‘breakage resistant’ hair can suffer from failing to retain hair length.
I do think the reason why I agree with you is because you are taking charge of your own hair instead of listening to everyone elses advice.
The biggest reason why naturals have length retention problems is usually because they are religiously sticking to someone else’s regimen. Clear signs like breakage when combing or not looking out for split ends are missed.
My sentiments exactly! Having fine hair is a challenge in itself, and I don’t know if some people understand that. I too stopped looking at ‘hair porn’ for the mere fact that I know I’ll be bombarded with images of hair that just don’t speak to my experience. Heads of thick hair and coarse hair (whether separately or simultaneously) are both beautiful, but fine hair and thin hair can be beautiful too, and it would help to have more info geared to length retention when it comes to fine and/or thin hair (cuz lord knows it’s not easy). Then again, sometimes I feel like I shouldn’t complain, because I could be the one to step up and start my own Youtube channel, but I know that’s not happening anytime soon…
I totally agree! I’ve been natural for almost 9 years and I was only able to retain about “19 of hair including the much needed trimming and cutting I had to do. Though I do have a lot of hair, its fine to medium and very porous. I’m just now learning in the past year that I have to constantly moisturize, and detangle/comb very gently or it will break. There are other things I’m doing too to help with the porosity and breakage issues (protein/moisture balance, henna treatments, etc) but it took me long enough to learn!
Oooh Hunny! It took me what seemed like forever to retain and keep retaining.
It hit me when my no-silicone routine was just producing sucky,dry results. I was trying to follow what everyone else was doing and my hair no likey. I finally busted out the Silicon Mix, serums, and heavy butters. My hair retained moisture better and, well, just behaved better. I started to see length (inch by inch) and I went from neck length to a full shoulder length within 6 months.
Anyways, sorry for writing a book, but the moral of the story is do what feels good for your hair and your lifestyle. Be gentle, find out the products your hair likes, keep it clean and moisturized. It has worked for me.
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I too understand your struggle. My hair is fine, but incredibly dense. It also extremely porous, and is exceptionally difficult to keep moisturized. Although I have had ok length retention (my hair is shoulder length stretched) I think thats been sheer genetics, because my hair always hits the point its at right now and stops. or should I say the length retention decreases dramtically. I never really found a regimen. I have tried lots of different things. The only thing I know is that my hair really seems to enjoy water/glycerin mixes, so that has been a staple, and a couple other things. I am also extremely styling challenged, and no amount of style tutorials will enable me to be able to braid, it seems, lol. It does get frustrating. But I remain hopeful I will crack the code one day.
Wow… very insightful. Just the other day I was admiring my full and lengthy fro only to remember those painful days of broken ends and frustration.
I started my natural journey in 2007 and since then have big chopped THREE times because of complete damage. I didn’t know a regimen. I didnt have access to the knowlege and products that I do now. I was trying to treat my natural hair with producs only meant for relaxers. And I can honestly say, in one year my hair has grown DOUBLE the length than ever before forthe simple fact that now I know what my hair needs and appreciates.
Thank you for this! Sometimes I feel like everyone else BC’ed, mastered their hair, and had this glorious crown of hair in two years.
I am still taking baby steps with my hair and I’m almost always frustrated with one step or another. I really needed this post because my hair is also fine and thin. Although I love my natural hair I totally feel like I am ‘effing this ‘ish up! I’m determined thoughout it all. I know I won’t reach great lengths/totally healthy hair anytime soon but I will.
This is so funny, I recently did a blog post about the commonalities among long haired naturals.
It took me about 3 yrs to figure out that the hair growth I was seeking was connected to length retention. It’s all about how you care for your hair and the techniques used. I noticed that a lot of the longer haired naturals have similar simple regimens but different products. I truly believe that if you use the products that your hair likes and utilize the proper techniques to retain length that long hair is possible.
It does bother me when some individuals milk the want of long hair of others to push products that are not proven to grow hair. If those products actually worked then they would fly off the shelves and be bought out by some corporate giant. I can go on for days about that…
Proper technique is so important.Before I could not understand why oils and shea butter wasn’t working for me until I used a different technique. I have to be heavy handed with my hair, I mean slather on the stuff then BOOM found out my hair loves oil and shea butter all along! A small but crucial detail of my proper hair technique…I have to slather on everything my hair is greedy lol!
Exactly! Mine too! My hair is DRY AND THICK! I can’t afford to be shy with the goods… I slather mine from root to tip!
I agree with the fact that there are a few Gurus on YT that once there hair hit about 9″ they started marketing products for rapid hair growth. Tutorial stopped and rapid marketing began. They forgot the reason why they actually had subbies.. for the $$$ signs. For people that who are new to the natural hair enviroment or some not so new.. they would jump on this band wagon(hope in a bottle).. thinking these ladies have the cure. But, the reality is they had reached the 2-2.5 year mark and the hair started to retain and have length..no MASTER HAIR GROWTH IN A BOTTLE. It is simple hair growth over a couple of years. As the writer has said learning your hair is key and with time it will get to where you want it to be~~
Yes! I have been without a relaxer for about 2 1/2 years. I JUST figured out a good regimen that actually makes my hair soft. And though I was retaining some length, I am now see my hair thriving. I found out my hair LOVES oil! Thus I do a hot oil treatment, oil rinse on wash days.