Where do you live?
C: I’m from California and I rep the entire Bay Area. I’m a published author, publisher and public speaker.
Why did you make the decision to go natural?
C: By default I have always been natural. I would get my hair pressed when I was younger and it would only last a day or two (unless it was drenched w/ grease) so I just started wearing the wash ‘n go.
When and how did you transition into natural hair?
C: I transitioned in high school because I could not wear the straight wrapped styles are the other girls were rocking. At first in school (the ’90s) I did not appreciate my curly hair. The “in” thing was straight hair in those wrapped styles like SWV … I wore it natural because I had no other options.
At that time in my life I envied those girls with the long straight hair (or weaves) and now today they envy me. My hair is long, full, thick, and I am still wearing it curly like I did over 10 years ago when I was in school.
What mistakes have you made with your hair that you’ve learnt from?
C: Blowing drying and flat ironing my hair was damaging. I loved the silky look but I slowly noticed my thick hair thinning. I learned to love it in its natural state. I still straighten it every once in a while (once a year) but I don’t damage it with a flat iron every day like I used to.
What’s the best/most effective thing you do for your hair?
C: Co-washing. Ever since I started co-washing I noticed my hair is less dry.
What do you use in your hair?
C: I love Kinky Curly products. I use the curling custard, Knot Today, and Come Clean. Somedays instead of Kinky Curly I use Eco Style Olive Oil Gel (Sally’s Beauty Supply) I get the same result but much cheaper.
How do you do your wash and go?
C: I shampoo my hair with Come Clean by Kinky Curly and saturate it with Knot Today and the curling custard. I braid it in 4 sections and put a scarf on it. When I wake in the morning I take the braids out and have a full head of fresh non-crunchy curls. I do this to avoid going out with wet hair. My hair is so thick that it takes a long time to dry and going out everyday with wet hair makes me catch colds frequently.
How does your hair express who you are?
C: I am a free-spirited non-fussy person. I am so low maintenance when it comes to my hair. I can get up and go fresh out of the shower and Iove that freedom. My hair does not bind me to spending hundreds in a salon. I can spend that money on shoes, LOL.
Is there a blog/webpage where we can find you?
C: Of course! My website is www.crjpublishing.com. I am currently on a book tour for my debut non-fiction ‘Black Men vs. White Men; the Black Woman’s Choice.’ You can find my book at: www.greendaypublishing.com
30 Responses
I take pleasure in, lead to I discovered exactly what I used to be looking for. You have ended my 4 day lengthy hunt! God Bless you man. Have a great day. Bye
Beautiful hair!! What color do you use?
I’m glad that Cicely J mentioned Jill Scott’s interview, I’ve been wondering what some of you ladies thought of that since you had such a negative reaction to the book cover.
Why is there such a hostile reaction to looking outside of the box? It’s obvious that many many black men are following this advice.
Take a look at Jill Scott’s interview for Essence Magazine. I guess Hollywood feels the same way I do:
http://www.essence.com/relationships/commentary_3/commentary_jill_scott_talks_interracial.php?page=1
Recent studies show that black women outnumber black men 5:1 …. If every eligible black man married a black woman there would still be 1.8 million black women left single.
I am sure most don’t have a problem with those numbers. For those who do I simply say, “if you choose to date ‘other’ we understand and support your decision”
As a writer I was asked “why are there no available black men out there for us?” My response to the questions are answered in the book. There are some available but the book details reasons why a lot of women feel as though there are not.
In life you eat the meat and spit out the bones. What we hear and how we live is not always rose petals and positive. So instead of sweeping the issues under the rug and pacifying the problem I expose it.
We have to support one another and put opur children, boys, men in check when they are wrong. Our prisons are growing but college enrollment has significantly dropped. The music industry and hollywood as a whole has made it popular for men to sleep w/ men and not consider themselves gay or bisexual so the AIDS numbers are higher for black hetero women than any other group. 80% of black children born in America are born into single parent homes.
So people can look at the cover, get offended by it, and bash me for it. I DON’T CARE! I am here to expose problems and offer solutions. While white America sits back, points, and laughs at our demise.
Before you judge the book (because of the cover) pick it up and read it and then cast your judgment. We also have a huge literacy problem in the black community.
The cover is not changing, the title is not changing, my opinions are not changing, but the studies and stats can change if someone wants to read it and make a change in our community. One family at a time.
Blessings to everyone on BGLH. I love you all. Supporters and naysayers. I will be sure to address some of your comments when I go on Oprah.
Cicely J
http://www.crjpublishing.com
ci****@***********ng.com
Its not a male bashing book at all. But I’m glad people are finally ready to talk about this subject.
I love black men! Prefer them over any other group of single men. However, I do want black men to know that the eligible ones are on the decline and since a lot of succesful ones choose white women over us (we are unanimously glad Tiger Woods passed us over, sorry Elin) if we don’t start choosing to broaden our horizons we are going to be left single and childless.
Black women need to stop looking for ballers and pay more attention to the cable guy because good black men are also passed over so we can get wined and dined by jerks. The cover and title is to spark interest but the pages speak truth not just about men, but the black women who sometimes drive them away. I am about building relationships, not tearing them apart. But until you read it, you’ll never know what exactly I have to say.
@Cicely J
The fact that you would do this to your own men, make a profit, AND sleep at night concerns me.:0(
It’s not cute. It’s not funny. It’s just pathetic. And for your horse**** of a comment that pertains that there aren’t enough BLACK MEN to go around last time I check they’re are black men from the Caribbean & Africa and there is a thing called the internet. There’s plenty of black men around. Stop with the scare tactics. I have no problem with scare tactics, I just wish it was backed up.
I love your hair pretty lady! I could wax poetic about how awesome your naturality is, but I’m a controversial person so I have to mention the book. Cicely most definitely has the right idea about the marketing tactics–the cover has certainly generated a lot of interest amongst us here on bglh lol.
I guess the only other thing I have to say about this is that, just like everyone else on this site has the right to express their opinions about black men, black hair or anything else…so too does this authoress have that right. The difference between us and her? She found the motivation to write and publish a book about her feelings. If someone thinks that black men are being slighted in some way…well, here’s your motivation to write a different book. With a different cover.
Once classes stop kicking my behind, I will be checking this book out! And I do love my black daddy 🙂
The hair is pretty, the book is not. And honestly the lower case “b” and upper case “W” looks like a stylistic error that no reputable publisher would make. (I know this was done on purpose to boost sales).
Sure, the pictures make a “great marketing ploy”…just like KFC had that offensive commercial where the white guy uses chicken to fit in at the cricket game—great marketing ploy doesn’t make it right.
Hi!
I’m not saying that I’ve had bad experiences at all, nor do I hate myself or any of my ex (black) boyfriends. Just stating something that happens to me almost every time I go out with other race females. Not saying I take offense either, I agree, people just have their preferences.
None of us can lie and say that this isn’t a great marketing ploy.
@ Nedra and Mesozxy and Cicely
So because a few black men have had the nerve to not find you attractive and instead look at your non-black friends or because you have had some bad experiences with a few black men that means that all of them are bad? Sorry to burst your bubbles but not all black men are going to find you attractive just like all black men don’t find me attractive. I don’t take offense since everyone is entitled to their preferences. Keep it moving. Bad men are bad men period and their race has nothing to do with it. Guess what, there are bad white men as well but I don’t see you all painting every white man in the world with the same brush. Maybe some black women need to take time to reflect on why they keep making the wrong choices in men and stop drinking the self-hatred kool aid.
Cicely, that book cover is disrespectful and I don’t care how much sales that you are generating due to the controversy. The fact is that if the content of the book is worth reading and is something that will open up intelligent discussion on the subject, people will buy it without that cover. You are just using a tired, overused and lazy tactic to sell your book.
@Athena, I agree.
@Cicely
Change. That. Cover. I don’t know which editor approved this but they need a whooping. Seriously. That’s just downright disrespectful.
@Alexa
Thank you.
I saw that too. It so obvious. I have no respect for this woman’s shady tactics.
My father black, my brother is black and I’ve recently taken a liken to a Ghanaian man and they don’t deserve this. They are all decent men and men of honor.
I’m very sorry for any BM that hurt you Cicely but to to drag whole race of BM though the mud of your -dare I say it- ‘self hate and bitterness’ is just plain wrong.
Even it do you have pretty hair. >_<;;;
@curlydo: co-washing is using conditioner rather than shampoo. Natural hair is already very dry and lathering can make it even more drying.
@Alexa (and others who inquire about the cover and wording) I appreciate your feedback. The statement “never judge a book by it’s cover” is true and valid in this case. My book is about black women having choices. Choosing not to be single just because there aren’t enough black men to go around. Feel comfortable dating “other” and you will get the support from your “sisters” to do so.
I love black men, my man is black, however, I know there is not enough for every one of us to have one.” As for the cover, marketing and shock value. I am a controversial author and my cover separates my book from a lot of other interracial dating books and good or bad the attention has boosted sales. I also address issues regarding black women who finish college and turn our backs on blue collared black men because everyone wants a baller. I support the good black men and fathers out there. My dad, brother, uncles, and fiance’ … all of whom are black men and support my book.
@DaliSalvadorAde: my hair falls that way naturally. Its not cut in any sophisticated style.
To everyone else, thanks for the hair compliments.
I agree with Nedra. Let us not forget how some of our black me have treated us. And do not tell me you have never had a similar experience… as when you are out with your White female or Latina friends and a black man chooses to look right through you to them automatically. How did that moment of reality make you feel? The cover simply suggests that what is inside could be a form of communication called persuasive writing… there is no law against that. Furthermore, the author has freedom of speech in which to present her message anyway she pleases.
Whoever designed that cover needs to be fired. That whole cover is completely deliberate- it went through a hug process just to be on the book, so don’t tell me that it doesn’t mean to suggest anything.
Cicely, your hair is fly, but that cover needs to sit in a corner and think about what it did.
Monoracial should have been intraracial. Sorry.
@ Alexa,
I have to agree with you. I know this topic is not what the original post was intended for but I have noticed a trend lately where we are being encouraged to seek out white men for relationships. Nothing wrong with that but why does interracial dating have to be encouraged for Black women or Black men at the result of seeming to denigrate either side? Why do people automatically think of White men or woman when they consider interracial dating? What is it that a White person is supposed to do for us that a Black person cannot? Why do we have to “expand our horizons” by dating White men if that is not something that we want to do? What is so wrong about wanting to be in a monoracial relationship with another Black person? Every other racial group is allowed to do it without being accused of being narrow minded and being lectured into expanding their horizons.
For the record, I’m not saying that is what the book is about since I have not read it. These are just some of the things that pop into my head when I see one of the zillions of articles, books, blog posts, news segments, etc about Black people and interracial dating. I am also not against it since I am the product of one but the topic annoys me to no end and the book just reminded me of that.
Nice hair…
I’m glad I was not the only one who got that vibe from the book…
Gorgeous hair and that color is fierce!
Love the title and cover picture… Black men often look at me with the same disdain (that the black woman has for the black man) when I am out with my white and Spanish girl friends. Maybe I’m around the wrong black men?
Will definitely check out the website.
Gorgeous head of hair!
Im gonna have to agree with some of the previous ladies……the cover of the book kinda made me uneasy.I was really enjoying the post up until that point.Nevertheless,the hair is beautiful!!
I know it’s not wise to judge a book by it’s cover, but I for one find the cover and title of your offensive. So i will not purchase or read this book. Good luck
Beautiful hair! Beautiful lady!
Beautiful!!!
@Alexa – I agree. The picture on the book cover is really terrible…what is that about? Imagery is supposed to provoke thought and at the moment I’m thinking what the hell?
What gorgeous hair! I really like the color as well, the caramel really compliments you…
Quick question: Did you get you hair cut in that way? That it kind of falls to the sides? I have seen “similar” hairstyling on other naturals, and I’m wondering how they got the shape to become that way. But then again, it seems as if you have been natural for a while, and maybe that is how your hair falls naturally. Anyway, I really enjoyed reading your interview.
@Alexa, I really don’t have a reply to your comments, although I agree that some of your points are valid, I highly doubt Cicely has a “disdain” for black men. Meh, actually, I am very over the whole black women/interracial dating topic.
BAY AREAAAAAAAA! :{D
The title of her book disturbs me. “black men vs. White men” i instantly noticed the fact that the b in black is lower case and the w in white is uppercase. that seems extremely deliberate. I also notice the obvious happiness the woman on the cover feels with the white man and her expression of “disgust” when she is in the presence of the black man, and from the summary i read of the book which says, “Never before have Black women been pressured to look away from Black men and to look to White men to build a relationship with, and Cicely J throws gas on this topic. She does more than pressure, she pushes.” it seems as though that is also deliberate. Please do correct me if i’m wrong. This is not meant to be a interracial debate or anything like that because i have nothing against women who choose to date outside of their race. i also have nothing against one encouraging others to expand their horizons and experience men of different races or cultures, BUT I would just like to say that it saddens me to see a black woman show so much disdain for a black man. I mean if that is Ms. Cicely J’s preference then so be it, but the visual makes me very uncomfortable. Hopefully I am misunderstanding what this book is actually about and it isn’t about trying to “PERSUADE” or “PUSH” women away from men that show resemblance to their fathers, ancestors, and homeland..
Since this IS a hair blog i would not feel comfortable leaving this comment and not mentioning the GORGEOUS head of hair Ms. Cicely J. has. Beautiful!
ok help me out… what is co-washing??