Last week we were all captivated by the images in the Atlanta Journal Constitution of a white dad โ Clifton Green โ who learned to take care of his adopted Ethiopian daughterโs hair. (Click this link for the AJC slideshow: http://projects.ajc.com/gallery/view/living/braids/) I was so amazed that I tracked Clifton down and asked if he would do a BGLH interview. He agreed! Clifton is a professor at Emory University in Atlanta, Georgia. He has shared his personal photos of him and his daughter, Miriam. He did all the styles you see on his baby girl!
Clifton: Let me first speak as a white adoptive parent of a black child. We know that love alone is not enough to raise our daughter. She will have experiences as a black person that we canโt relate to as white parents, and we need to reach out to the black community to help us raise our daughter into a woman that is proud of her culture and heritage. We live in Atlanta, and we have black friends in our lives and go to a church that is roughly half black, but we didnโt anticipate the support weโve received from the online community. Itโs been really nice.
BGLH: First off, we thought it was cute that you were using a fork. Iโm assuming it doubled as a comb?
Clifton: I used to use a fork to make Miriamโs parts. The rat tail comb I had at first wasnโt very pointy and I was more happy with the fork. I thought it made nice, sharp parts. I have a better rat tail comb now and Iโve gotten used to it so Iโve done away with the fork.
BGLH: How often do you do your daughterโs hair? And how long does it take?
Clifton: On average we wash her hair every 10 days, but sometimes itโs once a week or every two weeks depending on what weโve done that week (like playing in the pool or the sand box). I often re-do the braids or twists during the week depending on how theyโre looking (smaller braids last longer) .
BGLH: Where/how did you learn how to take care of her hair? Why did you learn to take care of her hair?
Clifton: Weโve always had black babysitters, and I loved it when Miriamโs hair started getting long enough for our babysitter to braid or twist (Miriam came home at 1 year old with very little hair). Our babysitter moved away and our new sitter wasnโt comfortable doing hair, and I missed how nice Miriamโs hair looked. My wife and I started doing it but gradually over time it became my thing, at least partially because we also had a baby boy that my wife was breastfeeding. We learned from books like โItโs All Good Hair,โ from other moms, and of course practice which Iโm still doing. Our goal has always been to help her fit in among other black girls and to feel good about her hair. Iโm not an expert, and weโre always open to advice and suggestions ๐
BGLH: Emotionally, how was the process of learning to take care of her hair? Was it ever frustrating or discouraged? Or was it a joy?
Clifton: Learning about hair care and styles has been a joy. Sometimes the doing can be frustrating ๐ I would say the worst has been my attempt at cornrows. They look like theyโre two weeks old as soon as I do them, and when I spend an hour or longer on her hair I want it to look perfect. So I havenโt tried them for awhile.
BGLH: If you could describe your daughters afro textured hair in three words, what would they be?
Clifton: Curly, coily, bouncy.
BGLH: Iโm assuming youโve been around caucasian hair all your life. This may be a kind of silly question, but what to you, is the most striking difference between the texture of your daughters hair, and the hair you were used to?
Clifton: I would say perhaps the most striking difference is how dry her hair can get. In my experience, white peopleโs hair tends to get oily between washings; with Miriam her hair dries out instead.
BGLH: Do you find anything uniquely beautiful about afro-textured hair?
Clifton: My favorite is the way it looks with two strand twists. It seems uniquely black and beautiful to me.
BGLH: Do you think the care you take in nurturing your daughterโs hair is having an effect on her self image? If so, in what way?
Clifton: Miriam is 5. Right now I think weโre laying the groundwork for when sheโs older and starts to think about her identity as a woman of color and what that means.
BGLH: And finally, I saw you have a young son. What does he think of his big sisterโs hair ๐
Clifton: Our non-adopted son is 4, and although we have discussions about skin color (they refer to it as brown skin and yellow skin), we havenโt talked much hair specifically. Although he says itโs beautiful sometimes, right now I would say he loves Miriamโs hair mainly because he gets to watch TV when I fix it. He also likes for Miriam to fix his hair with her barrettes and hair balls, and heโll sit still to let her do that. Our 2 year old son also enjoys Miriamโs hair stylings. Weโre on the wait list to adopt again from Ethiopia (another girl). So Iโll have more chances to practice my skills, and hopefully the girls can appreciate each others hair and practice styling on each other as they grow up.
Awwww. Cute story!
So greatโฆaww iโm trying not to cry.
This was a truly beautiful and touching story. I really commend him for sharing his story and parenting a black child. I absolutely love this post!!
So beautiful! I think this is the most heartwarming thing Iโve ever read on this blog.
Leila, you have done it again! Wonderful interviewโI think he is doing a fantastic job with his daughterโs hair. Its refreshing to read about his approach in regards to wanting Miriam to identify with her culture.
I love this interview! I was going to email you and suggest you contact Professor Green for an interview, but obviously youโre two steps ahead of me! Sheโs a very lucky girl to grow up with parents who will teach her to love her beautiful natural hair.
I love this interview! I really like that Mr Green is doing what he can for his adorable daughter to know where she comes from culturally. I wish him all the luck in his wait for the upcoming adoption!
Waw, this is such a nice story, I am new on your blog and I am loving it, I went natural a few weeks back so I am going to read more posts of yours. Best wishes.
He seems like a very caring, positive man. I hope the best for his family! I am glad he is so involved with his daughterโs hair and does not see it as a burden, but a beautiful gift.
p.s. i love her little twists, sheโs beautiful!
Awww, what a wonderful interview! I luv that they learned how to care for and style their adopted daughterโs hair. You go man!
I also luv the fatherโs description of her hair. More positive than what some black people would say about their own childrenโs hair.
I thought the AJC story was great but this interview just takes the cake! It is really a lovely story and Iโm sure Miriam, when she gets older, will truly appreciate everything her father did to make sure that she always looked her best, and therefore, felt her best.
This is such a great story. I love that heโs really trying, and that her hair is on point.
This goes to show that many more white parents of black and biracial children (that means you, lady on Tyraโs :Good Hair Bad Hairโ) can adapt to taking care of our little brown babies. <3
Awww! I read the story when it first came out in the AJC and itโs still one of the sweetest things Iโve ever read. I just want to give them all a big hug. ๐
swear i am so proud of him for this interview. sheโs a beautiful little miss. and he is the poster guy for good parents everywhere. love love love his mindset on parenting, especially when it comes to children of colour.
Too. Much. Cuteness.
Canโt. Breathe.
Death by Cuteness Overload strikes again.
Lovely. I think that my parents had a huge role in my view of natural hair. I always saw my hair texture as normal and myself as beautiful.
There are so many people who have a fractured relationship with their hair, we need more parents like my own and like this gentleman so that many more black women will not have to apologise for their hair texture.
iโm so in love with this whole situation! <3 <3 <3 leila, you killed this one!
@ clifton green:
thank you to you and your wife for opening up your home and hearts to the prospect of adoption and for your efforts in fostering a positive self-image for your daughter. little girls of all cultural backgrounds need more of this. your children are very blessed to have so much love in their home.
still not tired of hearing this story! A beautiful young girl with such loving parents is really a great thing to seeโฆwhich is why I think we need moreโฆlol! Parents who make a conscious effort to groom and take care of their daughterโs/sonโs hair all so they can feel validated and worthyโฆtoo sweet;-)!
What an amazing story! I am so touched! She is absolutely beautiful! I think it is great that he and his family are making it a point to keep her involved with other people of her race so that she will also be informed about her own culture. Wonderful, wonderful!
This interview is one of the best that Iโve read in a long time! This father, and family, have truly embraced Miriam and I can almost feel the love when he says anything about her. Any reference that he made to her hair were positive and beautiful. I love the Greens for that.
Weโve all seen the infamous YT of the mother cursing and abusing her young daughter while trying to comb her hair. I wish that mother would find this blog and realize that her way is absolutely the WRONG way and that she is abusing her daughter.
Bravo BGLH!!
I was so impressed when I saw this story, I appreciate him not putting a relaxer in it but doing research. This is what my mom did because it was the norm and now I wish I never had it. I think he is a role model and since his has a little publicity, he needs to head over to Brad and Angelinaโs house. Angelina wants a doll that has hair like her daughters but her daughter would love her hair if it looked liked this little girlโs. I want hair like this little girlโs and she is only five.… Read more »
Oh it was such a delight reading this story. It is wonderful to see the father not only take care but take interest in his daughters hair and the life she leads now and will lead as a Black/African-American women in this world. Not to mention is two-strand twist look AโMA-ZING!!! he should open a shop lol.
This is truly an amazing storyโฆbut in contrast there is a video circulating online which presents a case of what some would deem child abuse in which a black mother using expletive language is harshly combing her daughterโs natural hair. When you have these two stories in mind..one has to wonder what will it take to educate some parents on how to care for their daughterโs natural hair? Obviously, as in the case of this professor, one must be willing to learn and accept the natural aspects of the child (specifically the hair and its texture among other things). It… Read more »
Wow. Im in awe with this interview I am so happy that the child is blessed to have parents like Professor Green. Iโm just so speechless and happy right now. Wow.
this is an amazing story :] i love that they want her to have knowledge of her background and to be proud of it!
wonderful parents :]
Lovely interview.
BEAUTIFUL!! and lol @ the fork thingโฆI was slightly confused at first when I saw it. Great interview.
wow, this is such a great idea!I really enjoyed the interview. If a white man can learn to take care of his black daughterโs hair why are black mothers still perming thir daughterโs hair at 3 yrs old..just sayin..
http://womanofcolour.blogspot.com
โone has to wonder what will it take to educate some parents on how to care for their daughterโs natural hair? Obviously, as in the case of this professor, one must be willing to learn and accept the natural aspects of the child (specifically the hair and its texture among other things)โ So true! I think that this is issue with most parents that donโt want to learn how to do natural hair. It takes time to learn something that they probably never knew especially if theyโve been relaxed all their life. I love this interview, I wish that my mother… Read more »
@anon โ I have seen that video and it is quite traumatising.
I have to say that I wouldnโt like to see it featured on BGLH following this piece because undoubtedly comparisons on a race level would be made that wouldnโt necessarily be true.
I would love to see more positive examples instead. Perhaps like the youtube โfamily going naturalโ or other fotkis where parents feature their children.
I think showing positive examples is the way forward.
great job, one of the best interviews yet!
like patrica said before me, it makes you wonder why some black women are still relying on the box perm to do their daughters hair.
This was such a wonderful interview. Itโs great to hear his perspective!
cornrows are hard for many lol. maybe he should try parting them smaller if he wants them to be neater. I think that twists last longer and look cuter anyway, but if he wanted to try again thatโs be my tip.
this whole family is so beautiful! yay!
Bravo, BGLH! Fantastic interview and touching story.
@ Jcโฆ I agree with you 100%! I watched that video, of the mom abusing her daughterโs hair, and I donโt want it on BGLH. I do feel that positivity is the way forward. We already know a lot of black people have issues with their hair. Iโd rather discuss solutions. And youโre also right that the point of this story IS NOT to say that white people love afro textured hair more than black people do (Claire from the Fashion Bomb just came on BGLH with strong evidence that that is NOT the case on a macro level!) I honestly… Read more »
Love it. This is a great story.
Iโm so happy you did this interview. Her hair looks awesome. I think he does a good job.
Love it! Great interview. Thanks for tracking him down. When I initially heard this story, I definitely wanted more. Good one L.
Simply putโฆLOVE LOVE LOVE it!
This is such a lovely story! The fact that he took the time to learn how to care for her hair in its natural state shows how much he loves her and wants her to love and appreciate the way God made her!
I want the father of my children to learn how to do the same, regardless of his ethnicity!
Another great interview and such a touching story too. You can feel the love from the interview!!!!
Leila, u frigginโ rock! I love the subject matter. I applaud the families openness and willingness to learn. I may steal that fork idea, chile! My daughterโs texture looks similar to his daughterโs. All around feel good story.
This is simply amazing. I am so happy that these parents are embracing their child for who she is, while laying the groundwork for who she is to become: a strong, grounded, and proud black woman. Kudos to these parents. I will also say that this inspires me for my own hair and my own future children. This story has made me realize that caring for natural, textured black hair is possible for everyone, so I should have no excuse!
Its very heart-warming to see how love, patience and great care is shown physically in this little girls hair from her fatherโs hands. Its so odd I never would have thought deeply about seeing something like this until I went natural and understood the stigma people had behind natural hair. I was natural as a young teen and had hair down the middle of my back and after getting out of braids only had people call my hair unmanageable and watched perm after perm how my hair shrivel up to my shoulders. I didnโt hate natural hair *just perms for… Read more »
Clifton Green, you rock!
my goodness. he sure does get it. you can tell he and his wife gave a lot of thought to adopting their daughter.
Thank you for a sweet and beautiful story.
Very nice interview. It seems like he and his wife are doing a fantastic job raising Miriam (and doing her hair)!
I LOved it!!! such a good story!!
I am a Black, Jamaican woman, and I shared the original article with my friends and family when it first appeared in the AJCโฆeven my male friends were touched. Most of the women who read it were moved to tears (including me). I wish this family all the blessing in the world. It just goes to show that sensitivity to another personโs culture is what is important when our lives intermingle. Itโs ironic that this little Ethiopian girl is going to have better Hair (and I sure all-round) self-esteem than many little girls who have grown up in their own… Read more »
Aaawww, I loved that. Now if he could only teach me to do cornrows half as well as he does. Mine are horrendous, lol. But I wish more parents were like this. Good job!
Beautiful story.โฆI think that his daughter will always have memories of her daddy doing her hair. That will be such special memories for her.
this made my heart melt
awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww this put a smile on my face ๐
Awwwwโฆthis is so wonderful. I never expected like a follow-up on this story. Great work. Itโs even MORE heartwarming to read his personal expressions about his daughter and her hair. She is so beautiful and receiving some TLC. ๐
Amazing storyโฆ I love it.
And at Medina Green, I thought I was the only one thinking he could do my two strand twists any day of the week! Dude has skills!
Outstanding article! I forwarded it to my mother and she loved it as well. Also, THANK YOU re: I honestly donโt buy the mentality that seeking white peopleโs acceptance of our hair is somehow the way forward. It isnโt. BLACK PEOPLE need to learn to accept THEIR OWN HAIR. THAT is the way forward! I sorta get sick of going on natural hair forums reading threads about how people get โso many positive comments from white peopleโ about their natural hair. Positive reinforcement starts within oneโs self. Not a valid enough reason for one to wear their hair in its natural state.… Read more »
This was such a touching story. Iโm headed to Emory in the fall as a freshman. Iโm majoring in neuroscience and heโs a business professor so I definitely wonโt have him but I will be stopping by his office to commend him. Heโs an inspiration ๐
::wipes tear::
And donโt be discouraged by cornrows. A lotโฆ AโLOT of people I know including myself cant do them:)
Hello Clifton,
You are doing a great job! She is a chocolate beauty. I wish I could be your babysitter too. Thank you for embracing her heritage. Please do me a favor though and step away from the Vaseline, it is a poor clogger and totally unnecessary. Here are a fewer healthier alternatives: Jane Carter solution (Whole Foods), Diva Curls (Ulta), Giovanni (Whole Foods & Kroger, Nubian Heritage products for skin and hair (online)
Clifton, I hope you know how much this gesture will contribute to your daughterโs emotional well-being as a child, as a teenager and well into her adult life. There is a special intimacy that involved in styling a little Black girlโs hair because it is such a time-intensive and careful process. It is such a unique thing for a girl to share these moments with her father. There can be no more positive influence on the life of a girl than a close and loving relationship with a father who has always let her know that she is beautiful. I only… Read more »
OK, I have tears in my eyes. That was so sweet and thoughtful. What a father! Thanks for tracking him down and doing this interview!
this is a really nice article. came here by way of the 2009 Black Weblog Finalist list โ congrats.
great post ๐
Sheโs beautiful and her hair looks awesome. Good job dad!
This is awesome.โฆ..I have a white friend with a multiracial child and her daughters hair looks exactly this.โฆ..no matter how often I show her, that little girls hair is all over her head and it offends me when I see it and it is really degrading to her childโฆI am sending her this link.โฆthanksโฆyou are wonderful!
Awww! I absolutely loved this post!! Kudos to the dad for actually sitting down doing and understand his daughters hair!! I love this!! =]
sheโs a beauty..get your shot gun ready, Prof. Green..lol
seriously thoโ..I think this is great; like everyone before me said, itโs wonderful that he has taken the time and energy to understand her hair..too many times, even we ourselves get lazy..I know I do sometimes but people like him are inspiration..
like Jen said I only wish more little Black girls had this experience. period.
one more thing to ask God for in my potential mate..:)
This is a beautifully touching story. The connections heโs making with his daughter culturally as a black woman and as a father/daughter bond are lifelong and priceless. Kudos.
I love that you tracked him down for an interview. Thanks for doing this.
This just shows natural hair care really takes patience, willingness and a commitment to learn.
This follow-up interview is the best! :o) What a good dadโฆ I wish more little girls could get this experience with their hair.
OmGโฆ This is beautiful.
This is what any white parent of a black child should do. Research and figure out ways to deal with it not slap a perm on a childโs hair because you dont have the patience to do it. This is very exciting to read. We need more ppl like him, willing to learn!!!!
Beautiful story!!
I think he does an awesome job with her hair ๐
thats my finance professor, hes soo cool!
wow.. he did a good job with those styles
What a great man. It is sad to see for example, a mixed race child with such unkempt hair and you think to your self โmother must be whiteโ and sadly one is right 100% of the time. He just goes to show that if you care enough, you can learn to do a black or mixed race childโs hair whatever your race and background. Brilliant interview!!
Fabulous! Wonderful! Beautiful!
This was wonderful. I must share!
This is an example of the unconditional love a parent has for their child. Not only
was this couple unselfish enough to adopt her, they are raising her to love all aspects
of herself. Kudos to this fabulous Dad.
wowโฆmy heart got all fuzzy and warmโฆthat is soo sweet
I must say that you have mad skills! Her hair is beautiful! You need to teach me some of those techniques so I can use on my own hairโฆand I am a woman of color myself! ๐
This was a LOVELY story. I am sooooo glad he understands the importance of his daughter having a good self-image of who she is as a black woman! GREAT STORY! We need more dads like this!
This is a great story. More fathers regardless of race should learn how to do their childrenโs hair.No matter what your ethnic background you have to LEARN how to do hair. I havenโt met any one yet that knew from birth how to do hair. Thatโs why dolls have so much of it. lol Though I donโt have very much contact with my own father right now. I have very fond memories of him doing my hair. He and my mother both cornrowed my hair and I had a beautiful head of long natural hair. As this was in the… Read more »
THis story was awesome. i so appreciated the honesty and could feel the love. i couldnโt Believe it when i saw her hair! dad is doing a great job!
This man is a GOOD man when it comes to this issue.
I hope he reads all the comments.
Being able to take care of afro-textured hair is not an inherently black trait, I couldnโt do cornrows until I was 18 years of age โ nevermind having afro-textured hair from the day I was born.
Congrats to him and his wife, they are unique people, the world needs more people like him.
He doesnโt sugar coat anything or say things to please, he is just GOOD at heart.
Iโll immediately grab your rss feed as I can not find your eโmail subscription hyperlink or eโnewsletter service. Do youโve any? Please allow me know in order that I may just subscribe. Thanks.
at least he taken the time out to learn to do his childs hair, unlike the many black mothers that drag they daughters as young as 3 and 4 years old to the beauty parlor to put that fake garbage in itโฆ
White ones too, with biracial daughters.
saw a short blurb online on this and to hear the full storyโฆloved it!. What a great thing to see this Dad go the extra mile for his daughters self-image. LOVE,LOVE LOVE IT!
Her hair looks awesome..I really wish he would make a youtube video. Good job Dad!!
[โฆ] picture is definitely touching, and brings to mind Clifton Green, another white father who adopted an Ethiopian girl, and soon became responsible for her hair [โฆ]
He does hair better than me
Glad to see an update. What a beautiful little girl! Heโs better at doing hair than the lazy mothers who destroy their little girlsโ hair by putting chemicals and weaves in it.
i think i love himโฆwhat an awesome Dad!
This is a cute story. The cornrow situation made me laugh. Reminds me of my attempts. Practice does make perfect, so he should keep at it. Black peopleโs hair is really very different across the spectrum. And even if youโre an expert at doing your own hair, if you try to do someoneโs hair whoโs texture is different than yours, you could feel nearly as clueless as a white person trying to do a black personโs hair!! Iโve experienced this first hand when I tried doing what works on me to other people. Now I will tell anyone who asks me… Read more »