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NBC News Columnist Scolds Ciara For ‘Being Disrespectful’ Towards Ex-Fiance Future

Avatar • Apr 18, 2016

This past Monday, the video of Ciara and Ludacris announcing the nominees for the Top Rap Artist Billboard Music Awards went viral. In the video, Ciara announced all the nominees save her ex-fiance, Future, leaving many views to make assumptions as to why.

NBC News columnist, Yolanda Young took it a step further and wrote an entire essay dedicated to scolding Ciara for not conceding to her ex-fiance’s problematic behavior:

Ciara,

While watching you announce the Billboard Music Award nominations, I, and millions of others, witnessed your odd reaction to seeing your ex-fiance Future’s name appear on the teleprompter: your body recoiled, and you refused to utter his name.

Such a reaction may have been understandable had your former lover been thrust before you without warning. However, considering his status as a premiere hip hop artist, it seems unlikely that you would not have considered that he might receive a nomination for Best Rap Artist. It troubles me that even with forethought, you may not have recognized such a reaction to be disrespectful, to the man, but more importantly, the son you share with him.

My intent is neither to judge you nor dismiss what in all likelihood are justifiable grievances with your ex. Having no children of my own, I can’t begin to know the weight of such a responsibility. And if there is truth in any of what has been reported — infidelity, disengagement, and disparaging remarks about everything from your sex life to your parenting abilities — you have reason to be bitter, but that doesn’t make it a good look. Try this one on for size.

My mom married my dad after graduating high school, shortly before I was born. She endured years of abuse, verbal assaults but also the occasional slap, choke, and blackeye. She finally divorced him after his bullets came within centimeters of ending her life. At my dad’s trial, she asked the judge not to sentence him to jail. This would be the first of many decisions she’d make thinking more of me than of herself.

Read the full essay here.

Within minutes, the article soared through the twittersphere, prompting many folks including ESPN commentator Bomani Jones to respond.

The point was clear among many twitter users — Young unreasonably placed all the blame on Ciara without examining the malicious behavior displayed by her ex-fiance, Future.

https://twitter.com/nykd/status/721071991436935169

Three hours after NBC tweeted out the initial link,  the article with an editors note, distancing itself from the writer’s opinion:

Screen Shot 2016-04-17 at 8.20.01 PM

The public reaction was so substantial, that Young was moved to issue an apology.

In her apology, Young noted that she unfairly compared Ciara’s circumstances and expressed her concern over being accused of victim-blaming:

To those I offended,

There are many aspects of my earlier column for which I would like to apologize. I was accurately accused of using Ciara’s circumstance as a springboard to address issues that do not directly mirror her own. In media today, writers sometimes pounce on current events and use them to frame broader ideas. In my zeal to be topical, I did not give the issues of sexism, single parenting, and domestic violence the care, context, or empathy such subjects deserve and require.

My contrition extends to my leaving room for any inference that I condone or encourage abused woman (or men) to remain in tormented entanglements or remain silent about them. Supporting victims of domestic violence has been my life’s work, and I am distraught to think that my words could be interpreted as blaming the victim or sympathizing with the abuser.

Neither Ciara or Future’s camps have responded to the essay.

Sound off! What’s your take on it?

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Return the Stone
Return the Stone
4 years ago

So he can criticize her career and call her a bitch, that’s okay but she hesitated saying his name and apparently it’s reasonable to compare it to child/spousal abuse which is the lowest of the low. I do find it funny that someone who has no kids feels she has the nerve to criticize someone who isn’t harming their own kid but doesn’t agree with theverything kids father who was talking about suing her.

SheridaDaily
4 years ago

Yep—you hit the nail on the head. I wonder what Yolanda’s motives were for writing this essay or where she found the confidence to speak so boldly on a stranger’s life she had very little details of. It’s good she apologised though.

4Cyepyep
4Cyepyep
4 years ago

whew! social media is.…be very afraid.

Redseouls B
Redseouls B
4 years ago

I thought the essay was unfair too, but at the very least, Young knows how to apologize. I so appreciate folks who know how to apologize.

Christina Guillot
Christina Guillot
4 years ago

That columnist didn’t experience what Ciara went through, so she has no right to criticize her like that.

Justice S
Justice S
4 years ago

That columnist is covering her ass.She don’t care about Ciara or her situation.She just wants to exploit it for money and fame.

Rose
Rose
4 years ago

This D‑list writer Yolanda obviously wrote this to attract attention to her and her drowning writing career. As if Ciara owes her disgusting abusive ex any sort of recognition? Stop shaming black women who stand up for themselves!

Tanaquil
Tanaquil
4 years ago

Not here for NBCBLK or any other White-owned media companies with their token reporters or sub-channels. I sincerely hope that Black Twitter drug them for the fields.

CocoaGoddess
CocoaGoddess
4 years ago

Although sad, the columnist’s story doesn’t have anything to do with Ciara’s. But I hope CiCi knows that’ll she’ll be saying Future’s name for the rest of her life, lol. I really hope they can get passed this

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