On Saturday Beyonce released her new visual album, Lemonade, and it’s already being lauded as her most transparent work yet. Although it’s described on Tidal as “based on every woman’s journey of self-knowledge and healing”, many are speculating that it is an indictment of husband Jay-Z’s infidelities. While Beyonce’s camp was silent after the infamous ‘elevator incident’ of 2014, which saw protective younger sister Solange giving Jay‑Z a full on beat down, fans are connecting dots and concluding that the “Becky” with “good hair” mentioned on Lemonade is responsible. Add to the mix designer Rachel Roy’s messy Instagram photo captioned “good hair don’t care” shortly after Lemonade’s release, and the case seems to be clear.
For many black women Beyonce represents an unattainable standard of wealth, beauty, fame and prestige. We are proud of her and see ourselves in her, even as we struggle against the very standard that elevates her while slighting us for being too dark, too poor, not curvy enough or not talented enough. In the past Beyonce has hinted that she, too, struggles with this standard. In 2013 she sang “Pretty Hurts”, and in 2016 she declared that she loves her Negro Nose and Blue Ivy’s afro. But with Lemonade, Beyonce completely banishes the idea that she is an untouchable. In publicizing her own humiliation and disappointment, she connects with black women who too often experience infidelity and emotional abuse at the hands of the men around them.
Our own Lisa Jean-Francois spoke poignantly about this;
someone in my facebook group asked why Beyonce revealed so much of her marital business in ?#?lemonade?. My answer:
I can understand the need for privacy, but i think Beyonce knows she’s no longer her own person. She’s become so much more than a wife and owes so much more to the world than holding jay-z’s secrets. I think when you speak the truth there is nothing that can harm you. Nothing. if their relationship doesn’t survive this, what can she say but, “I told the truth.” Far too often, in black culture, we keep things secret in an effort to protect and we can say we are protecting “our families,” when in truth we are often protecting the men in our lives. When a girl is raped in black families, by a man in the family, how often is she made to then sit across from him at thanksgiving dinner? We keep quiet, but who benefits from our silence? When ebony magazine released the cover of cosby with the shattered glass across his face, black people were pissed. how dare “we” “air our dirty laundry” to the world? The reality is life is dirty. Marriage can be ugly. And women get hurt. We, black women, are not soldiers. It’s time we let the armor down and show what’s real. and what better way to do so than this album? She has this plaftorm, and she owes it to the world and to herself to use her talent to 1. heal herself and 2. change the way in which the world perceives black women. We are complex, we are flawed, but we are not work mules. fucking you, cooking for you, birthing your children, and keeping your secrets?!
And yet, a solemn moment of humanization for black women was quickly seized upon by many black men as an opportunity for public humiliation.
The deep, deep misogyny in these tweets is, in some ways, exactly what Lemonade is about — the notion that black women should be complacent in the face of constant humiliation. Hopefully all these men will get a sound social media dragging, because enough is enough.
This is what I hate so much about the black community.Black men want us to stand behind them and they won’t stand behind their black women.
Seems black women *assumed* this about black men. No need to hate, adjust your life and move on!
Right, let a white woman hold you down next you’re down. How pathetic of them.
The ignorance and internalised hatred for melanin in those tweets — renders me speechless. Lisa JF post is spot on.
Why on earth does everyone swear up and down that these songs are about her life? Singers sing songs that have nothing to do with them personally yet they just feel or have an interest in all the time.
What a bunch of sheep to make such idiotic assumptions without a clear confirmation.
This is so ugly and disgusting in way too many different ways. Trust mankind to take something beautiful and positive and spin it in a negative way. I’m just going to keep focusing on the fact that Beyonce is starting difficult conversations and shedding light on topics that need to be addressed.
While I appreciate this article, I really wish there wasn’t any focus on bitter male trolls. They literally view Black women’s happiness and self-esteem as a threat to their existence. It’s actually a form of mental illness at this point. I think it’s best to starve them of attention, unless they’re threatening physical violence. Let’s let Lemonade be OUR moment.
Still speechless and mad that I missed Lemonade on HBO.
Yawn… you didn’t know?!
Go see for yourself what these clowns post on YouTube. These tweets are just figurative lego blocks in comparison. Someone said years ago, “there is a civil war between black men and black women”.
I lol as BW continue to March, fight and stand behind BM while they continue to publicly humiliate you for being BLACK and women. These things don’t buy me b/c I checked out from the black community and BM years ago. I don’t feel any “cultural” connection or need for them at all. I pity the BW who continue to believe in BM and stay fighting for, supporting and uplifting them while they HATE everything you represent — being a BLACK WOMAN. When BW move on these Negroes will wake the fuck up — by then it will be too… Read more »
I want to see more black women abandon causes that only support black men. This until they support black feminism.
Sista’s please don’t do the blame game on “All Black Men” these are merely just a few c**ns that don’t like/love their mamas… But, I would love to see these black men express the way they feel about bw to a REAL BLACK MAN (with no self hate) AND WATCH THEIR TEETH GET KNOCK OUT… Just like that.. Those are only a few to our many loving black men.
Really????
Where are the “real” black men to defend us???
I hate Jay Z so much for cheating. I wish to heaven that Bey would leave his slimy behind. Why are women always expected to stay with a cheater?
Why are people believing this? You really think he cheated on Beyonce? After all of those stupid divorce rumors they are capitalizing on it now. They are both smart business savvy people.
those comments hurt. I feel sick to think that there are men, OUR men who think so poorly of us.
Oh please.…they’ve said worse in their rap music for decades now.….Have you all been asleep?
I know it really does hurt. I have been told by men in my family that men like this suffer from a mental illness. It has to be something serious to make them feel this way. We can’t rise if we don’t come together.
beyonce was cropped out the first pic
And this is why black men don’t get any respect from other groups–how can you, when you don’t even respect your own women??? The messed up thing is that brothers who actually do love & respect black women (and yes, they are out there–my man included) suffer because of the actions of the ignorant. They need to let them know, though!
Sadly our men are conditioned not to defend us. This started in slavery and just past down from generation to generation. Our black men were brainwashed through Christianity and fear of severe harm to themselves not to defend family or community.
Oh please! And quit with the ‘our men’ ‘our black men’ crap.…..They take pleasure in thinking they’re hurting Black women.
I have 3 black male children!! So I can’t join your band wagon on hating black men! You black men and women make me sick with this gender war crap. Neither one of you know how to take criticsm. That’s why we are in last place. We suck at critical thinking, communication… I can go on.
Shrugs
If anything, these coons aren’t doing anything but playing THEMSELVES. Oh, well…SMH
Their tweets are self hatred and ignorance at it’s finest!
Black Women do everything to help and support black men, and all they do in return is ignore our black women problems, degrade us, humiliate and more. Smh im done with them with their coon fool asses.
Can someone tell me when this hate for black women by black men started? Why all the hate? This is outrageous.
Thank the creator that majority of the men who speak this way are the minority. That’s why we’re all appalled. I don’t know anyone like this. People want shock value for hits. Popularity. Weak.
But the fact that the majority stays silent and allows Black women to be dragged through the mud by this minority speaks volumes. There are more men who think like his but are smart enough to stay silent. A man who watches you be publicly ripped to shreds and doesn’t defend you isn’t a “good” man either.
I agree
Don’t hop on the “blame all Black men” band wagon becuase of a few internet trolls.
The minority???? Are you sure?
It just has to be. Most black men I know stand up for us and respect us. These internet thugs are looking for attention via shock value.
This article is clickbait.
There are 10 kings for every coon, stop letting the few bad apples paint a picture of how all black men supposedly are. Black men and women need to unite because anti-blackness hurts everybody.
Where are these supposed “kings”? Because if they had one shred of any leadership ability they’d be able to shut this down. They are not leaders. They are not kings.
Definitely!
idiots
Lol I thought it was supposed to be a blog about how to grow healthy, long natural hair along with product reviews and hair styles ideas. Now it’s become another site posting about celebs and the ratchetness they’ve been getting into.
Unfortunately SheilaQ, it is not endemic to black men from America…we do go through the same things over here in Europe and having lived for some time in Cuba, I saw similarities there as well. There was a hashtag not too long ago trending on French twitter that went #toutestnoirsaufnosmeufs… which basically translates to “#everythingisblackexceptourwomen”…absolutely disheartening. But at this point, I can’t say that I´m much surprised. Just saddened. But we can´t look for validation from anyone outside of ourselves, and that includes from black men too.
These KNEE-grows are full of $h!t LOL. Down-low KNEE-grows wanting praise off white women. BM have never been for black women since antiquity!
Black women, is this enough to make you realize that you should expand your horizons and stop being so protective of black men? Because they’re all attempting to “elevate their status” with white women. And they’re failing to realize that everything they’re saying can be said about them and white men. @gawd Black men will NEVER replace white men as rulers of the world. They don’t have the mentality or the know-how. Vines and rap videos will get them nowhere. P.S. There’s a reason why you see more families with white women in the hood than you do those with… Read more »
Which hood are you talking about because the Appalachians are pretty much exclusively white and poorer and more drug infested than any hood in urban America my friend and always have been
Most Black men do not have twitter accounts and are not into trolling.
Okay.….not sure if about Jay’s infidelity, anyone can fill me in! However, these tweets, whether joking or not, just so over-the-top, unnecessary! These ignorant, thoughtless, pigheaded morons keep pushing us black women away with this mess! This is really exhausting and honestly we do not need this type of negativity in our lives!
They keep telling you that they hate you if you refuse to see that ii is on you. Me, I’m done. Been done, totally done. Moved on long ago. Wonder what the rest of you’all are waiting for?
The supreme pettiness, lack of class, and overall immaturity displayed by Black men on social media, in real life, and beyond is why I can’t date them or take them seriously whenever they complain about racism and the White man. We were Black Panthers with you, started BLM for you and to show your appreciation, you demean us and praise White women. These losers can kick a long rock off a short cliff as far as I’m concerned.
What type of BS is this BGLH???? If I wanted to read some misogynoir BS I would have went to twitter or w/e trash like these men reside. This isn’t article-worthy. In fact BGLH has been coming off a certain way concerning black men… It’s obvious you guys get a lot of your stories from websites like LSA… This is suppose to be a blog dedicated to uplifting black women I thought, not bringing bullshit like this to our feet.
Black men stress me out. Like black women are ALWAYS there for them when things go wrong, but treat us like shit
What is so ironic or so stupid of them s the fact Beyoncé showed how her and Jay Z reconciled . Secondly, these comments just confirmed why Beyoncé put a Malcom X quote how black women are the least protected in this country .
All they’re doing is making it easier for black women (with some self esteem) not to mess with them. I say thank you.
If this isn’t a wake up call to Black Women I dunno what is. Stop defending those who don’t give a shit about you stop siding and defending black men and black women who also promote misogynoir. They don’t give a shit about you, so fuck them and protect and uplift yourself because our very own people will always step on the backs of Black Women to get a pat on the head of white women and anything to replace white men as the rulers of the world.
And to BGLH, this site is becoming depressing. Just focus on hair!
I feel so stuck because I still support black love (obviously not with these misogynistic, probably down-low, coon types), but I refuse to be degraded like this. Like is this black men coonery shit endemic to the U.S.? Do you non-american black women see this same behavior in your men?
If not for Black women these dudes woulnt have even been born, I hope their family disowns them.
Why write an article highlighting clowns that are either woefully insecure with deep mommy issues are just desperate for attention and follwers… black women are among the most educated and hard working amongst us. They are leaders in their families, communities, and account for the largest segment of black entrepreneurs. Don’t give your detractors a platform: ignore them… define yourself for yourself.
Also…don’t promote the narrative that regardless of what you accomplish, your happiness hinges on others acceptance of you. If you think these clowns represent the majority, you are spending too much time in the internet world and need to get back to the real world and around real men.