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A White BGLH Reader Responds: Why ‘#TeamNatural is for Black Women’ is NOT Reverse Racism

Avatar • Jul 6, 2014

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Who should be represented in #teamnatural? It’s a debate that’s raged for days now — here on BGLH and on other natural hair and black women’s blogs and vlogs. BGLH writer Christina gave our official response — while we understand the need for multi-racial spaces celebrating curly and textured hair, we also feel strongly that spaces — like BGLH — that focus on representing the black natural hair experience are absolutely essential and necessary. Another one of our writer’s Jc, had a different opinion, and described this exclusion as “apartheid.”

BGLH has always had a small but significant percentage of followers who are not black, bi-racial or Afro-Latina. Many of our white followers are mothers of bi-racial or adopted black children. Some are hair stylists who cater to a multi-racial audience and want to educate themselves. And others are just women who love the ingenuity and creativity of natural styles.

As this discussion has raged on, the voices of our white followers have been largely missing from the debate. That is until two days ago when a white BGLH reader, Ali, sent me this email;

Hello!

I started to post a comment on the blog but felt like I may be imposing so I thought it might be better to email you one on one! I am a white lady who usually follows along silently to learn from this site. 

It would be sad to see this particular community shift focus. I came here because a coworker was sharing about her big chop and I wanted to learn more. I hang around because the site has helped me clarify more points of privilege I have while I learn more about hair care (I have curly hair too). 

Y’all have something special here. It isn’t offensive (to me anyway) that it is a community for a specific group of people and I am not a member of that community. I feel lucky to know about this corner of the internet and I’ve shared the site with a lot of people when the topic of natural hair comes.

Thanks so much for all you do. This site has, in all seriousness, helped me be a better person/ally.

Take care!

I asked Ali if she could clarify her stance, and present it to our audience. Thankfully, she agreed. So I sent along a few questions and asked her to speak freely and honestly. Now, I know that Ali can’t speak for all white BGLH followers — or all white women who follow and participate in natural hair blogs. But, to date, she is the only long-term white BGLH follower who has weighed in on this debate. Here are her replies;

As a white curly, what kind of struggles do you face with your hair?
My struggles have mostly been aesthetic. My hair is frizzy and I live in a very humid part of the country so it never looks polished. I’ve also got a mix of curl types so it is just as much work to make it look cute curly as it is to straighten. If my hair is short, forget curls.

My hair is also incredibly dry so I have to choose products wisely to balance out my color treatments (yes, some of this I’ve done to myself) and naturally dry hair.

I want a hair type I don’t have and I’m still working to accept that.

Alianor straight hair

Ali’s straightened curls

When you are struggling with your hair, where do you get help or advice?
First and foremost, the internet. I’ll google for suggestions on how to moisturize and how to style.  My awesome colorist is also a good source of information on how to take care of my hair.

How did you come to discover Blackgirllonghair.com?
A coworker mentioned starting her own subscription business of natural hair care products and that same coworker was talking about her own big chop. I started googling to learn more about what she was doing and found this site!

I want you to be totally honest here — and you can! — has anything we’ve written ever offended you, or made you feel excluded or unwelcome?
Not that I can recall. The name of the site is “black girl long hair” so I figured this wasn’t a place for white curlies and that was fine with me. I read here because there is so much good information and I actually think the community is pretty special. It’s an inspirational place and has helped me realize that I do want to grow my hair back out to wear curly again.

I’ve also learned more than I can articulate about my own privilege. There have been so many “Oh!” moments when reading articles about things I’d never had to think about. Reading here has genuinely helped me see more of the small things that are easily lost in a larger conversation about race and beauty. You think about other topics differently when you listen to the stories shared here.

I liken being here to participating in technical groups who teach women to code. I’m active in a large women’s group for female tech workers but I write checks to Black Women Who Code because their organization is reaching out to a very small niche in the tech community. I think BWWC is vital to the health of the tech community but it isn’t designed for me and my physical presence could be counter productive. Black Girl Long Hair is serving a specific community. As someone outside that community, I’m welcome to learn but I need to know that there is someone else who should be in the spotlight.

When you log onto a site like Blackgirllonghair.com, is your expectation that you will be represented as a white curly? Do you think it’s racist or exclusionary that you’re not? (And you can be totally honest!!)
I’m pretty sure the title sets the expectation! No, I don’t expect to be represented here and I don’t care. I have serious issues with the term reverse racism. This is a space for a specific experience and I have no experience to bring to the discussion, so why would I care?

What do you like most about the blog?
I’m worried this will sound cheesy but my favorite part of the blog is seeing a wide range of women who aren’t represented in more mainstream media (including certain sections of blogging!). It’s nice to have a place to go where I can learn about beauty and see a wide range of women represented.

Do you wish there were more spaces where curly haired white women could gather to discuss hair topics? Why or why not?
I’ve been to Naturally Curly but didn’t hang out for whatever reason! I’ve been on the internet a while and feel like a lot of hair sites do have some information for white curlies. Given that I’ve got color treated, 3c curly hair, I’ve found more helpful information on sites like BGLH. I’m going to sound like a jerk but there really doesn’t seem to be a *lack* of space for white ladies to talk about our hair.

Have you faced any kind of discrimination personal or professional because of your hair (guys not finding it attractive, feeling the need to straighten at work, etc).
Omg, yes yes yes.. I feel the need to straighten-ish my hair (I wear it wavy at shoulder length, where it unfortunately is right now) so it looks, as my mom would say, styled. I’m fine at day-to-day work with curly hair but I always do my hair [straight] for pictures that are going out to the web.

Multiple boyfriends have asked me to straighten my hair in the past. My partner now doesn’t care either way. He’d probably prefer I quit complaining about my hair above all else.

I have my own internalized curl-hate to contend with.

Who are your curly haired “idols”? Are there any celebrities or social media gurus that you look to for advice?
Hrm. That is a hard question because I usually assume people have professional stylists- ha! I love Alicia Keys when her hair is curly and I’d like to have Debra Messing’s curls.

I use Pinterest a lot for hair styling tips. I follow The Beauty Department and Hair Romance in addition to this blog.

This was a heated topic. There was a lot of emotion and even pain on both sides of this issue. As someone who is part of the BGLH community, but a different race, what would you say to your fellow curlies?
Every community needs a safe space where they feel like their voice and their experience is highlighted. BGLH offers a home for people who are poorly represented in internet and published media spaces to be heard. I can only speak as a tattooed-blue-haired-early-thirties-white women (tried to drill that down) who thinks this space operates successfully as a platform for underrepresented voices in the beauty world. We all benefit when we learn how to listen to the experiences of other groups. My voice has an outlet in many, many other spaces in no small part thanks to white privilege, I don’t need one here.

The heated arguments over this topic serve to show us how deep historical hurts go and that this site means so much more to many of us than hair care. As women who are clearly represented outside of this space, it is our job to be quiet until invited to speak, learn from the community where we still have personal work to do, and use our voice in other places to help pave a path so others have the chance to use theirs.

I know I sound a bit harsh and overly political about hair but the personal is political. Nobody would be fighting this hard if it were *just* about hair.

So there you have it. Ali will be reading through the comments. So if you have follow up questions or reflections, please feel free to share!

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Jill
Jill
6 years ago

I wish that as black women, instead of fighting for complete exclusivity, could see that this natural hair movement has the ability to inspire ALL types of women all over the world.

it’s the birth of natural acceptance that started with us and spread all over the world.

EmbracingMe
EmbracingMe
6 years ago
Reply to  Jill

Honestly black women need a space of there own. The young lady basically said this when she said white women really don’t have a problem with finding sites for their hair.

lala
lala
6 years ago
Reply to  Jill

i dont think u get it. its not about exclusivity, its about encouraging our OWN PEOPLE. we have been put down for centuries due to our skin color and hair and now we want to say “hey we want something of our own to better our self esteem, energy balance, happiness” but u are saying nah lets make it for everyone?? there have been times in history that we have allowed whites in and have stupidly ended up losing the entire movement — or in some cases its just seen as some trend. does my natural hair look like a… Read more »

ninagirl93
ninagirl93
6 years ago

the voices of black women expressed on this site were ENOUGH. although I understand the good intentions behind this article, it is also highly problematic. we do not require whiteness to legitimize our experiences and emotions. this tim wise-esque co-sign was unnecessary or rather misplaced on BLACKgirllonghair (most of whom are in the know). Please cc this to becky, felicia et al instead

Black Girl With Long Hair
Reply to  ninagirl93

I understand what you are saying nina. And I respect how you feel. The only reason we made the decision to include Ali’s voice is that we noticed many black readers were speaking on behalf of our white audience, making assertions about how they feel. Whether it was our writer Jc referring to this as apartheid, or other commenters saying that our space was hostile, we felt it was important — given the discussion — for a non-black reader to speak on her own terms. Ali’s voice is not to legitimize us, but to offer her perspective. This was a… Read more »

Mere
Mere
6 years ago

I would like to thank both to you and Ali for this interview it was really interesting.

MelyB
MelyB
6 years ago

I appreciate your inclusion of Ali’s comments but wish that more Caucasian women like her would express their views directly to “Felicity” AND to Nikki. Sadly I think her views would fall on deaf ears, as did those of us who expressed anger & disappointment about the feature. This issue would have died down days ago had that chick not been so dismissive in the face of the controversy she thirsted for; compounded by Nikki’s sel-serving “response”. Given the reactions of not only Nikki but several prominent vloggers/bloggers, I am convinced that this was a troll stunt geared towards increasing… Read more »

O
O
6 years ago
Reply to  MelyB

I came to that conclusion as well.

Nikki’s response added fuel to my mind about that.

MelyB
MelyB
6 years ago

I appreciate your inclusion of Ali’s comments but wish that more Caucasian women like her would express their views directly to “Felicity” AND to Nikki. Sadly I think her views would fall on deaf ears, as did those of us who expressed anger & disappointment about the feature. This issue would have died down days ago had that chick not been so dismissive in the face of the controversy she thirsted for; compounded by Nikki’s self-serving “response”. Given the reactions of not only Nikki but several prominent vloggers/bloggers, I am convinced that this was a troll stunt geared towards increasing… Read more »

Deedeemaha
Deedeemaha
6 years ago
Reply to  MelyB

Even if they express it, my fear is we would never know. I don’t think if she had sent e email to them they would have post it like BGLH. Thank you for the honest post.

Puff
6 years ago

Hi @BGLH, I just wanted to thank you for posting this and patiently and thoughtfully responding to all the discussions. You all did a marvelous job of balancing the major points of views and as women in journalism (and yes what you’ve done here is journalism), you have done a tremendous job that would rival any major media outlet. You’ve remained fair throughout and you’ve handled everything with such tact and grace. I know a lot of women have been critical about sharing Jc’s opinion and now Ali’s but I think this was a great time to have these sort of… Read more »

Amanda
Amanda
6 years ago

I want to thank you for including this article for the reasons you stated. I was conflicted about my reaction to this issue primarily because I have such a diverse group of friends (white, Hispanic, Asian, etc) and wondered if my view on exclusivity was, I guess you could say, hypocritical because I CARE about my friends’ feelings. (I emphasize CARE because I do not rely on my friends to “approve” or “validate” my decisions – which has been a accusation I’ve seen repeated on comments the past couple of days. ) While I still do think that the original… Read more »

Val
Val
6 years ago
Reply to  ninagirl93

It wasn’t about legitimizing our experience, it was about saying she respects our space and appreciates what BGLH has taught her about privilege. And personally I feel better knowing a ww was listening and waited to be asked before going off in the comments about her opinion.

lurking
lurking
6 years ago
Reply to  Val

Oh, she“respects” our space.…..While invading it, *deep sigh* here is the thing, her voice was not needed period, end of sentence. Like someone said up thread “other” voices should be irrelevant and most definitely not spotlighted, this space is not about them so why in the he’ll are we making it?

jojo satoes
jojo satoes
6 years ago
Reply to  ninagirl93

So ironic right! They still needed the white stamp of approval after all the noise about BGLH being a platform for only ‘black’ women. This is fine as long as the WW agrees w u! Exclusivity is not the issue, mental slavery is! You can be exclusive all u want, but until u emancipate urself from mental slavery, ull always be in chains! Speaking in general and ‘you’ is not being directed to anyone in general.

jojo satoes
jojo satoes
6 years ago
Reply to  jojo satoes

Not ironi, meant hypocritical!

Ash
Ash
6 years ago
Reply to  jojo satoes

ROFLMFAO at Ironi!!!! OMG, I can’t…

jojo satoes
jojo satoes
6 years ago
Reply to  Ash

Lady I’m posting from a cell phone- sue me!

EmbracingMe
EmbracingMe
6 years ago
Reply to  jojo satoes

I agree with. However, I don’t mind her express herself. But black when should have a space of their own. Every other race does.

black nerd lover
black nerd lover
6 years ago
Reply to  jojo satoes

Mental slavery?? You want to talk about mental slavery… 1. This white girl — who you defended AT LENGTH in previous articles written about this topic — disagrees with EVERYTHING. YOU. SAID. All the noise about how terrible and awful and racist black women are for “excluding” white women in the natural hair movement. She disagrees with it all. She is probably confused as to why you, Jojo, are setting yourself up as the savior of curly white girls when, as Ali stated, they don’t even NEED a space like this. 2. Instead of criticizing the white girl — who disagreed… Read more »

jojo satoes
jojo satoes
6 years ago

I never disagreed w this white girl. Hell, I didn’t even read what she had to say cuz I don’t need her perspective as I don’t think this debate had anything to do w her. FURTHER, I never defended Sarah. Rather, I defended Nikki’s right to choose who to feature on her blog n I’m pointing out BGLH hypocrisy. The big bad white woman doesn’t scare or intimidate me so I have no issue w them partaking in a site such as this. Over hundreds of black women voiced their opinion n concurred w BGLH yet it was not enough… Read more »

black nerd lover
black nerd lover
6 years ago
Reply to  jojo satoes

Jojo, I did not follow along with all of your comments. But I remember you specifically taking strong issue with BGLH’s definition of #teamnatural as a black woman’s movement and saying something like they were trying to force that definition on others. You did not JUST have beef with people criticizing CurlyNikki’s choice — you had beef with the whole discussion on who should and who should not be represented in the natural hair movement. And even if, as you say, BGLH has “mental slavery” (eye roll), it does NOT detract from the fact that you have fought in this… Read more »

jojosatoes
jojosatoes
6 years ago
Reply to  jojo satoes

Yes, forcing exclusion on others such as Curly Nikki and bloggers like her who want to be more inclusive. That’s what I meant and said. I’m fighting for the blogger’s choice. I have a problem with people dictating how someone manages their content just because that person is black with natural hair and have a blog that feautres NH. You cannot show me any statement where I so called fought for a WW, even in the comments section in this post. Let’s not misrepresent the facts!

Kellee Blue
Kellee Blue
6 years ago
Reply to  jojo satoes

I agree, this is the truth and it sad.

sowhatwhocares
sowhatwhocares
6 years ago
Reply to  ninagirl93

felicia? don’t you mean Joan?

Dananana
Dananana
6 years ago

Thank you Ali for presenting your viewpoint so eloquently and respectfully! It’s relieving to know that some White women understand why a lot of us want this space to be our own and aren’t personally upset by that desire. I think it’s really great that this site has helped you learn about your hair, our hair, and the culture surrounding it all, and I seriously hope that you stick around! And don’t be scared to comment–I love reading ALL perspectives on this site (even ones that I don’t agree with), and based on what you said above, I’d love to… Read more »

Ali
Ali
6 years ago
Reply to  Dananana

I’ll be around, Dananana! I usually don’t comment because I feel like I should be listening rather than speaking. Other posters have pointed out that my comments might be better for other sites where these discussions happen. After thinking it over, I agree with them so I’ll probably remain quiet here but do a better job speaking up elsewhere.

I appreciate Leila inviting me to post here all the feedback I’ve gotten. I’ve gotten a lot to think about! All in all, I’ll probably continue to learn in the background to be mindful of your space.

Love
Love
6 years ago

Great interview! I loved the different perspective. Thanks Ali!

Missc
Missc
6 years ago

🙂 <3
Yep. Lol

naturalgamergirl
naturalgamergirl
6 years ago

I think Ali did an amazing job expressing her feelings about this site and about her own struggle to accept her hair. I also think it was an excellent choice for BGLH to invite this point of view. I don’t get the anger about someone of another race sharing such positive thoughts about natural hair and about BGLH in particular. People would have (rightly) furious if she had been negative or hateful, but now some are angry because she was positive and supportive??? Isn’t part of the point of the natural hair “movement” to help everyone, not just black women to… Read more »

Tezrah
Tezrah
6 years ago

I don’t think it’s racist for black women to have a place of there own about our hair. Our hair is unique compared to other cultures. Yes white women can have 3c hair and so on but it’s not the same. Black women need a space to feel beautiful, for once in history we have our own positive image of beauty and I don’t think white women she feel the need to complain because they can’t be apart of this. We should come together as humans but have our own community. I have nothing against white women, a lot of… Read more »

Jaznellow
Jaznellow
6 years ago

Great interview! Very insightful — thank you for posting this. 🙂

Kb
Kb
6 years ago

Great interview Ali, but the issue was not about BGLH and it being a platform for white curlies too. This issue as I understand it, is whether white ppl can say #teamnatural. But this interview is about BGLH, so.….…

Victoria
Victoria
6 years ago

Awesome! It feels good to see that we can have something to ourselves and not be seen as racism or the like. I don’t see how a group of people who were discriminated against and excluded can want/make something just for us and then be called racist. Gosh can we win one for once!

Tenille
Tenille
6 years ago

As a community, we have far too many issues to solve than to be concerned about who is truly natural and who should be included in the natural hair discussion. I stooped relaxing my hair in 2007 because my hair never did well with relaxers and I was feed up with the breakage. My decision had nothing to do with being Afrocentric or embracing my heritAge because my hair never defined my existence as a black women. We really need to move past this race debt. Can we have any discussion about any topic with having a race debate? My God!

straightnochaset
straightnochaset
6 years ago
Reply to  Tenille

I agree with you!! I stopped perming my hair because I too was tired of seeing my hair being constantly dry and breaking off. Also, I wanted to cut back on expenses because I wanted to buy a house. It had nothing to do with ‘returning to my roots or ‘proving how proud I am to be black.’ I didn’t see myself as part of a ‘movement.’ We are facing losing our voting rights, our unemployment numbers are still off the chains, and our children are dying in rapid numbers to gun violence. Spending (wasting) time going back and forth… Read more »

Love
Love
6 years ago

Yet here you are commenting. You have no idea how the rest of the commenters spend other moments of their time (possibly championing those other causes) yet you criticize.

I always hate the simplicity of those ” we should be worried about x instead of z” statements. In that case, we REALLY should be worried about climate control over gun violence…

In summary, get your life.

Nancy B.
Nancy B.
6 years ago

I agree it is just hair to some naturals. For other naturals it’s political or political as well. It is awesome when mutual respect is shown for the diverse reasons natural choose for being natural. Same for those with relaxers as well.

Girl...
Girl...
6 years ago
Reply to  Nancy B.

It’s honestly just hair for a lot of us. But a lot of us also understand that people who see us in pictures or on the street who don’t know us will not see it as “just hair”. Being aware of yourself and the workings of your society is not a bad thing. Whether we like it or not, plenty of people will forgo our individuality and lump us together for negative racial stereotypes and other things. I’d rather be lumped in with people that want me to be a better version of myself than a group that works to… Read more »

TWAtl
TWAtl
6 years ago

Couldn’t agree more. If this site was about general discrimination, our economic situation, the number of black men facing jail time unjustly, I could understand the rage. But the site is literally only about hair!! its rarely even about other aspects of black beauty, I’ve never even seen an article about how we are under-represented in the fashion and beauty industry, its less political than BOSSIP for crying out loud. I even understand (although ultimately I don’t agree) the argument about exclusivity but I don’t understand the rage.……

Bloop Bloop and Kermit
Bloop Bloop and Kermit
6 years ago
Reply to  TWAtl

Actually, this site deals with discrimination and controversy in relation to Black hair. There are several articles about it.

In fact, there are 3 articles about race/hair/discrimination in that sorry Apartheid article. Even most “How to get the best out of (insert product here)” articles do touch on how our Hair is perceived. It’s at least mentioned in most articles (and comments).

jojo satoes
jojo satoes
6 years ago
Reply to  Tenille

Me too. Stopped in 97 cuz I was tired of spending my time in salons. Whites have always been accepting of my hair than blacks n I’ve worked in very conservative industries. As a young lady I worked on me, elevated my thinking and knew that no WW or BW for that matter was ever a threat to me or an impediment to me reaching my full potential. We’re so much more than hair n other aesthetics n that’s something we have to teach n embrace. Natural hair is becoming another distraction.

Finn
Finn
6 years ago
Reply to  jojo satoes

Stop being solipsistic! Stop invalidating the experiences of other people. Stop invalidating the experiences of your predecessors! Your experiences are valid, trust, but they do not trump the facts that led up to creation of the movement. Your experience is valid, but it does not trump the majority, who just so happen to be experiencing a much less aggressive version of the behavior that was taking place during the 20th century. If most of us are having these issues, and it can proven with testimony/data/facts, and has been going on for centuries, the problem is you. We are more than… Read more »

jojo satoes
jojo satoes
6 years ago
Reply to  Finn

I understand ur passion but my position us and had always been there is no single story so there’s no single sokution. The natural community is diverse n we need the discussions and s options to be multi — faceted. I understand ur passion tho n was not trying to invalidate ur experiences. Just because I agreed n shared my story w the lady doesn’t make ur perspective less valid. There’s no one single or right story, perspective n solution. That has been my point all along.

jojo satoes
jojo satoes
6 years ago
Reply to  jojo satoes

Is not us. Posting from cell phone for all the spell checkers! Lol

EmbracingMe
EmbracingMe
6 years ago
Reply to  Finn

This is what white America want arguments,debates,and division in our Afro-communities. Instead of unity, education, and progression. History has taught us this!!!! Also, history has proven that whites have done the same thing the young lady being interviewed has done. Set back, steal our ideas, and learn our culture so they can continue to keep use divided. Now post this to your website so all can see!!!!

Anon87
Anon87
6 years ago
Reply to  Tenille

Yes, we can stop making everything about race when “they” stop making everything about race. Racism is not our problem, it is theirs. “They” have a problem with people who do not look like them. Yes, it’s exhausting having these debates over and over again. But that’s because it continues to be a problem for them. Unfortunately, people of colour (not just black people) by and large have not freed themselves of forced white ideologies (which is a world wide problem). White supremacy is so dominant, that we as a collective have allowed ourselves to be dictated and controlled by it.… Read more »

Verolyn brown
6 years ago

This was an interesting article ..but also a political correct article …that was smooth and understanding , Although ‚I still think she what you to mention her race just a tab bit to get her foot in the door however, you did told her to be honest . Somehow she is talking around the question you ask and not quit being direct: at least that’s what it sound like to me.
Keep up the good work missy.

Iva
Iva
6 years ago

This is the best line to me: “We all benefit when we learn how to listen to the experiences of other groups.” Not everything has to be about you in order for you to gain some benefit from it. And if you need to make something about you for you to gain something from it, then there is something wrong with you. I would love to know why Ali didn’t stay with naturallycurly. I find it incredibly suspicious that most of the blogs (curlynikki) and the vloggers (African Export, Quest for the Perfect Curl, CharyJay) who are in favor of inclusion are… Read more »

Monica
Monica
6 years ago

As a white mom to two biracial children, with very different types of hair, this site has helped me tremendously as well. I have one adopted daughter and one biological, and their hair is as different as their personalities. This site has been awesome for me to be able to learn different ways of caring for their hair. I’ve never even thought to be offended by the fact that the site is geared exclusively for black women, or by #teamnatural. I wish that my oldest would be more embracing of her natural self, and not wishing she were white, blond hair,… Read more »

Hmmm
Hmmm
6 years ago
Reply to  Monica

If you want your children to embrace all of who they are you will have to teach them about black history. Don’t count on the school to do it. Bring them around black family or close friends often so they can be nurtured. Maybe even live in a diverse neighborhood if that’s not the case. Put up art that resembles them or magazine pictures of black and mixed women on their wall. I know that pictures helped with a friend of mine growing up. I don’t know much about your situation but I hope some of these suggestions can help… Read more »

Girl...
Girl...
6 years ago
Reply to  Hmmm

Yep! There are a lot of myths and debunked things to read up on. In the even that you can’t get around Black people often, there are a bunch of sites that can teach them as they get older about their history. Like the above poster said, the school system will fail your children in that regard. A lot of the information that has been in the comments was information that had to be found independently. there are a few (note, few) Social Justice tumblr pages that can provide you with some really good information. But for now, show them… Read more »

Mehna
Mehna
6 years ago

Ok… interesting perspective — and it’s actually one that I’m not surprised to read. And as you stated BGLH, this is one perspective … but, how many others (this includes women of all races) feel like the instigator of this “controversy” over at CurlyNikki? A lot — same with some others who have this notion of “entitlement”… good, bad, indifferent — as your interviewee stated — it’s not ‘just about hair”…

Shirley
Shirley
6 years ago

You guys really have to get a life. As a Black women with natural hair, it’s absolutely embarrassing to know that this is how some of you behave. Just stop for a second and grow up! If you spent have the time not trying to purposely exclude people then your life would be better. Certainly no one likes it when WE are excluded so give up the self-righteous bullshit. Really, just grow up. It’s tired and been done before.

Finn
Finn
6 years ago
Reply to  Shirley

Considering ‘you’ and your ancestors have always been excluded, and this movement was created so that you and the rest of us could get some needed self esteem so you wouldn’t feel as bad as they did…you should hush Shirley.

And for the thousandth time, that word “exclusion” does not mean what you think it means. Here are some dictionary definitions, please utilize them in future conversation and debate.
[img]https://bglh-marketplace.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/Screen_Shot_2014-07–02_at_6.jpg[/img]
[img]https://bglh-marketplace.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/Screen_Shot_2014-07–06_at_2.jpg[/img]

God Bless.

#Adoseofreality
#Adoseofreality
6 years ago
Reply to  Shirley

Smh. #NewBlack and #WhiteApologist alert!

Andrea Hjerpe
Andrea Hjerpe
6 years ago

I don’t find anything offensive about this article at all. I find Ali’s voice and perspective quite refreshing. I don’t feel at all that she is stepping on anyone’s turf. From my own personal experience I have had women of Caucasian descent come up and ask me about the regimen of my hair. In turn I take the time to answer them kindly and explain my natural regimen and the capabilities in what my hair is able to withstand or how it works under certain elements of heat,moisture and so on. I think it’s more out of healthy curiosity than… Read more »

April
April
6 years ago

That whole Becky comment is so racist. I found what Ali had to say interesting and didn’t think this article legitimized this site to be exclusive for black women. She was respectful and I appreciated that.

#Adoseofreality
#Adoseofreality
6 years ago
Reply to  April

I agreed with everything you said except for “That whole Becky comment is so racist”. I implore you to please read up on the fundamental differences between prejudice and racism.
The comment you are referring to may have stemmed from prejudice/bias, but if it came from a Black person or any person of color/minority, whose groups are clearly not in places of power or privilege, it simply cannot be racist.

Finn
Finn
6 years ago

Ya’ll can go ahead and retire that cape now.

We told ya’ll.

tan
tan
6 years ago

Im so sick of white people having to be included in everything bgwlh is for what black girl with ling hair not whites wake up blacks whites dont want us in they shit hence Tommy Hilfiger etc.. why cant we have something of our own w/o having to apologize or explain it

Deedeemaha
Deedeemaha
6 years ago
Reply to  tan

Huh. Lol

...
...
6 years ago

I think I understand where people are coming from. This article would do better shared with white people even though I’m positive most will ignore it. It being shared here does nothing because it only tells us what we already know. Instead of going to the problem Curlynikki and Sarah. We are pretty much shown “hey a white lady agrees with us!” Good. Now.…why aren’t you confronting those white women that feel they need to be included in everything. What I mean is look at all the loud black women that cape for nikki and Sarah. Then crickets vice versa.… Read more »

...
...
6 years ago
Reply to  ...

I may have a few errors. Forgive me I’m typing from my phone.

Iva
Iva
6 years ago
Reply to  ...

I don’t disagree but one reason no one can bring it to Nikki is that Nikki or whoever is now running that site is super quick on the delete and block. So just because comments aren’t appearing doesn’t mean things aren’t being said.

shelley
6 years ago
Reply to  Iva

Hi ALL. I have posted comments on curly nikki and NHM and both have been deleted. Perhaps its because they don’t wish to acknowledge that there are people out there that are actually involved in this industry but from outside of its ‘culture’. My scientific knowledge of excessively curly hair is second to none. I have worked very hard to understand the characteristics of ALL hair types. I own the largest private collection of electron microscopy images of hair samples from African descent. I run workshops for fostering and adoption services teaching ALL carers how to cater for the needs… Read more »

Shameka
Shameka
6 years ago
Reply to  shelley

Once again you Shelley, and women like you are TOTALLY missing the point that this is not just about the science of textured hair. This is about the systematic and dogmatic insistence that black hair conform to white hair… or black people conform to white standards. You sit on your “texture” perch an “expert” on curly hair… but you are not an expert on the culture of black hair struggles… there is a difference. Are there people of non color with curly hair? Yes. Have they experienced the promotion of self hate to such a degree that young girls have… Read more »

Krystal
Krystal
6 years ago
Reply to  Shameka

This is by far he BEST response I have heard in this entire debate. it is GENIUS Shameka!! I couldn’t have put this better myself. WOW!!

Every point was PERFECT. just perfect. Brought a smile to my face 🙂 🙂

Ali
Ali
6 years ago
Reply to  ...

Sorry to be replying a day late! You are right. I caught wind of the articles a few days after they posted because I’m behind in all of my blogs and I thought my response would be too delayed to be relevant. I emailed BGLH directly because this is the site I follow. I don’t follow any of the vloggers or websites that initiated the original posts so it never even occurred to me that I should email them too. That was my mistake. I totally do understand what you are saying and I’ll be sure to reach out to… Read more »

liz
liz
6 years ago
Reply to  ...

Yes, thank you. Women in our community will get up in arms over European issues, but never realize that white people historically never got up in arms for any of us. They won’t fight and die for our cause, that’s our job.

Susie
Susie
6 years ago
Reply to  liz

That’s funny because I distinctly remember many whites marching on Washington during the Civil Rights era. Oh, and let’s not forget the white abolitionists or the whites who voted for President Obama, not once, but TWICE. Selective memory is a bitch!

Bloop Bloop and Kermit
Bloop Bloop and Kermit
6 years ago
Reply to  Susie

It’s not selective memory. For every abolitionist and freedom rider, there was about 10 times as many people who would disagree with their behavior. Very few people actually owned slaves. But the mindset that Black people are inferior, unfeeling, and deserving of terrible treatment was widespread. Slavery and White supremacy would not have gone on as long as it had, and it would not have been anywhere near as successful if there were as many people fighting for us as there were people fighting against change. I don’t believe most white people are the devil, and I doubt many people… Read more »

CherryBOMB
CherryBOMB
6 years ago

*Sigh* 2 strikes. I get what y’all were trying to do, and it’s fine and dandy that she has a grasp on why many are upset, buuuttt… Y’all (BGLH) missed the point. Or are trying to milk the controversy. Or both. Whatever. First of all, when we say white women or non-Black women, we don’t actually mean ALL. We don’t know every single one of them. But what we do know are the trends of the group based on past and present experiences and we judge them on that. And stereotyping a group in power does not have the same… Read more »

Dananana
Dananana
6 years ago
Reply to  CherryBOMB

CherryBOMB, I totally understand where you’re coming from, and I’ve been in agreement with what you’ve said from the get-go…but let’s stop and think for a second. 1. Ali probably didn’t ask for her POV to be featured–Leila most likely decided to feature it because it’s relevant to the issue at hand, and like you said, site hits. Can’t knock her hustle. 2. Leila probably decided to feature it also because while we (you and I and everyone else who can think critically) know that not all White women want into our spaces, the comments sections in both articles on… Read more »

CherryBOMB
CherryBOMB
6 years ago
Reply to  Dananana

Hey, I totes appreciate you sharing your ideas on what I said. Let me try and keep my response organized by numbering it too lol 1. Honestly, only the very last bit was directed at Ali. Like I said, I’m not mad at her (or other women like her outside of the movement). She got where people were coming from and wanted to show support by sending an email. Cool beans. Up to this point we are in agreement, I think. In fact, the only issue I had with the girl on CN was with a:How she distorted whole the point… Read more »

Dananana
Dananana
6 years ago
Reply to  CherryBOMB

Ooh, I just wish that Scrunchie would disappear into a dark corner somewhere and sit her ass down. I know what you mean… I’m going to go even more ham if yet another platform (have you seen the nonsense YTers are spouting?) suggests that wearing a bun or flat-ironing is equivalent to being pressured into slapping caustic chemicals on your head so you can get or keep a job. They can miss me with that nonsense. No, Leila doesn’t have Naturally Curly down her throat (on the surface, some of her comments were…interesting), but she has to maintain connections with… Read more »

CherryBOMB
CherryBOMB
6 years ago
Reply to  Dananana

@Dananana I’m personally avoiding Scruchie’s social media as well as CN’s, but if mainstream media catches wind of this… God help us lol

Saying thanks is ok, but it’s important that people know that getting one a luxury. Most times you have to stand up for what’s right even if everyone’s telling you to shut up, or the people being degraded are not present to validate your efforts. I think there’s a growing number of people who get this, and it makes me warm and fuzzy inside ^__^

And yaas we need a show *2snaps* haha

cacey
cacey
6 years ago
Reply to  Dananana

and this is why I keep having to find new jobs”.

this is awesome. i so lol’d with you right here.

Dananana
Dananana
6 years ago
Reply to  Dananana

Or a blog? If anyone *cough*especiallyCherryBOMBFinnPuffCaceyblacknerdloverAnon87*cough* is interested, email me at danacheri@gmail.com. Because I’m seriously considering it. Culture discussions are nice here, but I’m starting to really need a space for critical race theory that isn’t filled with tumblr trolls.

Dee
Dee
6 years ago
Reply to  Dananana

Slow Clap!

Amari
Amari
6 years ago
Reply to  Dananana

In total agreement, and yes, I find it inspiring when my fiance (called him husband before, but y’know we basically are married just without the funds right now) is also frustrated and pained by the ignorance and hatred that still prevails. I find it inspiring because, like Ali’s article, we are all people and can empathize with others, as long as we can get out of our own heads (“Getting out of our minds, getting into our lives”, a psychotherapy book) I think a lot of it comes from self-doubt and insecurity, and if we could all just deal with… Read more »

Susie
Susie
6 years ago
Reply to  CherryBOMB

Could be because racism doesn’t sell, sweetie. You cannot have anything that is strictly black and expand your base or your wallet. If you hadn’t heard, America is a consumer society and the bottom line is the bottom line. I don’t understand why ppl are always shocked when this happens. Rappers do it all the time. You want black only, start your own not for profit blog and control the environment. Otherwise, recognize you do not live here alone. The so-called natural hair movement has not been patented for black women. And why are you so concerned about those who… Read more »

Finn
Finn
6 years ago
Reply to  Susie

Saying that the cause of racism against Black People is our exclusion is not a strong argument. It’s not even an argument, actually.

Saying the consequence of an occurrence is the root of the occurrence is a fallacy.

That’s like saying a victim of sexual assault REALLY isn’t a victim because the rape would not have occurred if (insert dumb reason here).

Do better.

CherryBOMB
CherryBOMB
6 years ago
Reply to  Susie

Black ppl spend about nine times more on beauty than any other group, so you’d lose way more money isolating Blacks than whites. Go ask Carol’s Daughter.

The rest of your comment was filler. Didn’t read.

Patricia Kayden
Patricia Kayden
6 years ago
Reply to  Susie

Your snide sarcastic comments are exactly why I am on the “Teamnatural is for Black women” side. If White women have issues with natural hair, they can start their own spaces to discuss those issues. I will not intrude.

Adina
Adina
6 years ago

I really don’t understand why allowing the perspective of ONE White person seems to translate into ‘needing a White person to legitimize the discussion’ to some people. I personally saw it as a different perspective. In my mind, the discussion was already legitimate when Christina first wrote her article. My views were already valid at that time, and reading this didn’t make me think ‘A White woman agrees with me! Yay!I can die happy!’ No. Just no. This was/is a discussion largely fronted my Black women and allowing the the view of on White person has done nothing to change that. Are… Read more »

CherryBOMB
CherryBOMB
6 years ago
Reply to  Adina

So. How is this different from featuring Scrunchie on CN again? Cause you’re saying word for word the same thing as the people defending her. Right down to the false equivalencies, claiming we’re overreacting and being militant, alla ‘dat. Just replace the first ‘white person’ with Sarah. I mean, she WAS just one white girl, amirite? smdh. But keep on sippin’ that kool-aid, I heard it tastes good… Some of y’all looooove to air our dirty laundry, I swear. But hit me up when mainstream (white) society gives a shit about our opinion on literally anything. Like who made the… Read more »

Adina
Adina
6 years ago
Reply to  CherryBOMB

I don’t really remember saying anything about anyone being militant, nor have I made any false equivalencies. Sarah was trying to equate people making fun of her hair with the centuries long struggle of Black assimilation into White culture. Saying that defending this opinion piece that gives us a third perspective is the same thing as defending a White woman who thinks she can identify with the Black hair struggle as a whole is a false equivalency in itself. I said, and I repeat, That allowing this woman to speak here doesn’t necessarily mean that they did it for validation.… Read more »

CherryBOMB
CherryBOMB
6 years ago
Reply to  Adina

“Are some people so resistant to White people that something this innocent would be viewed so negatively?” ‑I read this as you saying BW who don’t like this are overreacting => BW being too militant. But that’s just me. “We don’t like it when White people speak for us, but a lot of us were doing that for White women on the first two articles.” ‑I read this as a false equivalency, because BW speaking for WW aids in our self-preservation (safer to assume the worst and keep them out than to give the BOTD and ‘see what happens’), Where WW… Read more »

Susie
Susie
6 years ago
Reply to  CherryBOMB

Why do black ppl still put value in white commodities like the Grammy’s then get mad when excluded? The Grammy’s is a white institution created for whites by whites. Just cuz they let a some black faces in does not change this. Why are you mad these white folks did not validate blackness on their turf when you seek to exclude whites on what you perceive to be your (black) turf?

Finn
Finn
6 years ago
Reply to  CherryBOMB

@ Susie “The Grammy’s is a white institution created for whites by whites.”, “Black Turf”, “Why are you mad these white folks did not validate blackness?”

.…lol.

CherryBOMB
CherryBOMB
6 years ago
Reply to  CherryBOMB


But you just said Black validation isn’t enough to make money in America 🙁 You just said exclusion is baaaaddd :(( YOU JUST SAID white people have to like us too?? :(((

Contradictions on top of contradictions. Sit.

#menditmoses #Googleisyourfriend

Danielle Paige
Danielle Paige
3 years ago
Reply to  Adina

@Adina I could not have stated that more eloquently.

Sabi
Sabi
6 years ago

And yet here you are including another white chick.

Deuces.

Another worthless blog to stop supporting.

jetblu@gmail.com
jetblu@gmail.com
6 years ago

Layla, your confused aren’t you? You can incite a riot, but you can’t control it! 😉

Robi
Robi
6 years ago

Ali thank you for expressing yourself in such a clear way. I very much appreciate it. Also I’m glad the author accentuated the fact that Ali’s opinion does not represent that of all white women. I think it’s important to remember that one person’s opinion (who belongs to a particular group of people) doesn’t represent the opinions of all members of that group.

Jai
Jai
6 years ago

I LOVE my BLACK SISTAHS!!! We DO NOT Require any VALIDATION from anyone. You damn right it’s NOT reverse racism because there are too many groups that we are NOT accepted in at all!!! I’m sick of women that are NOT black always commenting on “why black women are so sensitive when it comes to hair.” This community was built for BLACK women.…PERIOD. So if you are offended by our REAL comments then don’t read them and stop trying to be black. #STRONGREALBLACKWOMEN!!!!!!!!!!!

keeping it real like a real sista should be
keeping it real like a real sista should be
6 years ago
Reply to  Jai

That’s Right! Too many of us are so quick to glorify white women beauty standards. We need to love our hair and accept what we were born with.

Jai
Jai
6 years ago

EXACTLY!!!

Annie
Annie
6 years ago

This debate over who should be able to claim team natural is stupid & ridiculous. It sounds more like its about race than anything. It don’t even matter if you have curly hair or kinky hair, just as long as you’re black, then you’re in. If someone wants to claim natural, let them. Natural doesn’t mean nappy hair. It means existing or caused by nature & not manipulating it with chemicals. Therefore, anyone is capable of being natural & not just black women. Black women do not have the power to dictate anyone of using a word that is so… Read more »

Dananana
Dananana
6 years ago
Reply to  Annie

I mean, Ghandi was actually a terrible person, and you’re clearly ignoring a bunch of history, but whatever floats your boat.

Finn
Finn
6 years ago
Reply to  Annie

You do know Ghandi was a racist, right?

Ya know…towards Black/African (“Kaffirs”) people?

A general belief seems to prevail in the colony that the Indians are little better, if at all, than the savages or natives of Africa. Even the children are taught to believe in that manner, with the result that the Indian is being dragged down to the position of a raw Kaffir.”
(Reference: The Collected Works of Mahatma Gandhi, Government of India (CWMG), Vol I, p. 150)

But please, continue to quote that racist little gremlin.

[img]https://bglh-marketplace.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/side-eye.jpg[/img]

JAgirl
JAgirl
6 years ago
Reply to  Finn

wow you learn something new everyday…I had no idea ghandi was racist, n people always hold him in such high esteem.

Bloop Bloop and Kermit
Bloop Bloop and Kermit
6 years ago
Reply to  JAgirl

I think when folks do one great thing, people tend to overlook the ugly. He was also a fan of fascism, the caste system, and a few other not so nice things.

He was fighting apartheid, but would not extend a hand of help to the Africans who were dealing with the same treatment.

Kit
Kit
6 years ago

…and was also (probably) a pedophile… :/

Finn
Finn
6 years ago
Reply to  Annie

And before you or anybody talking about us being bitter and self-segregating or trying to hit us with “Well, Dr. King said (line from his ‘I Have a Dream Speech’) Since everybody loves ‘pro-integration’ Dr. King, singing kumbaya, and telling us to “be the change you want to see” (without telling us how we can change the problem of WHITE SOCIETY FORCING US INTO A CORNER SINCE WE’VE BEEN HERE) so much: “I’ve come upon something that disturbs me deeply: “We have fought hard and long for integration, as I believe we should have, and I know that we will win.… Read more »

Anon87
Anon87
6 years ago
Reply to  Finn

Yup, and Malcolm X said it best: Why are we so worried about integration and being all “we are the world,” before we’ve even stablished or attended to issues in our OWN community (not direct quote lol).

CherryBOMB
CherryBOMB
6 years ago
Reply to  Annie

Yaaas check this fool quoting Ghandi-offer-all-of-your-sheep-to-the-slaughter’s racist ass! And you got some nerve talking bout lightskin/darkskin when he swore by that caste system shit. Do your research, boo. Dananana, Finn, and many others…

man, I <3 my team!!! #TeamNatural

[img]https://bglh-marketplace.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/fist-pump.gif[/img]

Goodnight lmfao

Dananana
Dananana
6 years ago
Reply to  CherryBOMB

#TeamNatural#TeamTRUTH24_7_365!! Lol, I don’t even know what I’m doing with these hash tags, but love to you as well! *Hugs*

Susie
Susie
6 years ago
Reply to  Annie

THANK YOU, ANNIE!!!! I am not surprised by all the thumbs down given to your comment when one recognizes the overwhelming sense of victimization most black women on here glom onto. I can’t add more because you put it down so succinctly.

Shameka
Shameka
6 years ago
Reply to  Susie

yeah HUMANS tend to feel like victims when they are robbed of everything that makes them themselves… and then years later becoming ourselves again finding the descendants of those who victimized us stealing every damn thing but the muffuggin Sun… have several seats and listen, you just might steal… ooops I mean learn something from this discussion

Good-digger
Good-digger
5 years ago
Reply to  Annie

EXCUSE YOU? How has creating/being the change you want to see all of a sudden turned into thinking the world owes you something? You’re CRAZY, quoting Ghandi, a man who was pro-caste system, on a site dedicated to helping black women of all shades see the beauty in themselves. Black people didn’t create those separations either. It was Europeans who created the race structure and the house slave/field slave separation. I wonder how many times you’ve told “white women” to “get over” themselves, or what power they have to dictate what words are used. I wonder if you’re even black.…and… Read more »

Kellee Blue
Kellee Blue
6 years ago

This is getting ri-DAMN-diculous. This defeats the entire point. Seriously?? I couldn’t even finish reading this article. Why?? Because it had nothing to do with what black women come to this blog for. Hell, it doesn’t even have anything to do with what this white woman comes to this blog for. So why are we taking the time to stop what we have going here for one white spectator? I think her writing BGLH was fine and dandy. However, the interview-part is whack. It’s not that we think every white woman ‘wants in’ on the natural hair movement. It’s that… Read more »

Finn
Finn
6 years ago

I tell sincere white people, ‘Work in conjunction with us- each of us working among our own kind.’ Let sincere white individuals find all other white people they can who feel as they do- and let them form their own all-white groups, to work trying to convert other white people who are thinking and acting so racist. Let sincere whites go and teach non-violence to white people! We will completely respect our white co-workers. They will deserve every credit. We will give them every credit. We will meanwhile be working among our own kind, in our own black communities- showing… Read more »

Anon87
Anon87
6 years ago
Reply to  Finn

Yes yes yes to those Malcom X quotes! I love me some Malcolm X, he spoke so much truth.

Sara
6 years ago

I think all of this controversy is terrible. I wish the NH community wasn’t so segregated. Sometimes it’s messy, catty, and their is always someone throwing shade. There are hair type (3 a/b/c versus 4 a/b/c) battles all the time on blogs and instagram. Now it’s about race. I just wish that we could all get along. I personally don’t feel all the way accepted because now I am considered the “new black” and not the real back just because I have light brown skin and 3b hair. It’s really unfair & confusing for me. I thought that the natural… Read more »

Bloop Bloop and Kermit
Bloop Bloop and Kermit
6 years ago
Reply to  Sara

You do realize it’s been always about race, right? The racial implications associated with hair are the reason there are texture wars. It’s been discussed to death in the other threads. Natural hair movement includes ALL women who are of Black/African descent. Whether you are Latina, Puerto Rican, Biracial, Jamaican, Haitian, Nigerian, Ethiopian, or from some small town in Alabama. You’re black, it’s for you. Whether you’re light or dark is irrelevant. You have a place here. We know that Black people have issues with color/texture, this movement has always been about fixing that and accepting one another in all… Read more »

Shameka
Shameka
6 years ago
Reply to  Sara

jeezus ever loving christ child you are black… this new black nonsense. YOU ARE BLACK even when one of your parents is white… No one considers you white baby girl as light skinned as you might be you are black, therefore you belong in the movement if you are natural. God almighty these folks out her got black folks thinking they anything but black… field negro house negro you still a negro, this includes latino negros… Look if you can’t pass (i.e rashida jones) chances are you are considered black even when your extremely light with almost straight hair.. We… Read more »

Amari
Amari
6 years ago
Reply to  Sara

I don’t think that the debate is separating us, it got you to write a comment and I have written several when I usually do not comment or post on blogs at all. However, we all must recognize that our issues and our history influences this debate. I’ve personally never heard of the “new black” and I grew up in an affluent neighborhood in Brooklyn, which is now one of the homes of black hipsters (lol, said somewhat jokingly). I can’t apologize for their racism and rejection of your light brown skin and not as kinky hair, no one can.… Read more »

lala
lala
6 years ago

Why is this debate dragging?enough articles about it already. When are we seeing anotherstyle icon?

EPI
EPI
6 years ago

I am not understanding why anyone would think we are racist because we are doing our own thing that was not acknowledged ever until we presented it. We have years of operating the way the American society want us to be; remember this country made products that destroy everyones hair so to be natural we can only support each other; do you have any idea how we maintain our hair with caucasin products its a disaster and haven’t worked on our hair for years. The product line for caucasin women just started to consider us after we did a high level… Read more »

Rms
Rms
6 years ago

You know you guys I hope since ‘we are the world’ and ‘there is only one race the human race!’, this yeAr fall fAshion week black women are on the runways since they weren’t last year or the year before or the year before and before that! I sincerely hope the inclusive is reciprocal !!! LOL as an 18 year old young black women even I’m cognizant that white women don’t give a crap about black women!!! Mama didn’t raise no fool!!

Patricia Kayden
Patricia Kayden
6 years ago
Reply to  Rms

Preach!!

Rae
Rae
6 years ago

Yes exactly…She gets it. You can define
“Natural” anyway you want, but when black women are speaking about it, we are talking about Natural Black hair. I read many articles in Vogue/Vanity Fair etc..with hair tips and know they aren’t for me. That’s okay too, because bottom line…Our hair is different.

Tee
Tee
6 years ago

i meannnnn…can me and this lady be friends?! i LOVED her responses. Kudos to her to for her empathy and interest in learning about people other than herself.

Adeola @ TheManeCaptain

wow, i missed this session. such long comments, shows the NHC still has a long way to go!
http://www.themanecaptain.blogspot.ca

trackback

[…] And it’s not just black women weighing in on the white woman’s place in the natural hair movement. A white reader, Ali, shared her opinion on the matter with Black Girl Long Hair: […]

Bloop Bloop and Kermit
Bloop Bloop and Kermit
6 years ago

It is basic business that you do not do business with someone who does benefit you. If a party does not pay for your time or service, you lose profit. If that party has a very long history of paying you dust, what would you do? If the ‘exposure’ given by the other party does not bring any new business to you, when do you decide that you won’t do business with that group until they can bring something of equal value? Until someone can explain why we have always been invisible in mainstream, even when we protest, do not call… Read more »

Bloop Bloop and Kermit
Bloop Bloop and Kermit
6 years ago

*does not. ‑_-

Alyssa
Alyssa
6 years ago

Thank you for your input Ali! 😉

Susie
Susie
6 years ago

For all you Malcolm X quoters, let’s not forget some of the things he said after his visit to Mecca: “Never have I witnessed such sincere hospitality and overwhelming spirit of true brotherhood…I have been utterly speechless and spellbound by the graciousness I see displayed all around me by people of all colors.” “There were tens of thousands of pilgrims, from all over the world. They were of all colors, from blue-eyed blondes to black-skinned Africans. But we were all…displaying a spirit of unity and brotherhood that my experiences in America had led me to believe never could exist between the… Read more »

Finn
Finn
6 years ago
Reply to  Susie

1.) This after his pilgrimage to Mecca and he saw what true unity was among races. 2.)He still felt that in order for us to experience true racial unity, white people needed to change the way they looked at and viewed us. They are the majority, the words of a racial minority who has always been generally ignored are not going to sway them. In order to be accepted in mainstream, there need to be a conversation between white people. The quote I used about sincere white people came towards the end, post-pilgrimage. His most militant quotes usually include some form… Read more »

Amari
Amari
6 years ago
Reply to  Finn

Thank you Finn! I relate to your comments.

CherryBOMB
CherryBOMB
6 years ago
Reply to  Finn

…Selective memory is a bitch!” ‑Susie

the ironyyyy lol

Susie
Susie
6 years ago
Reply to  Finn

Finn, 1)I already pointed out that the quotes were post-Mecca before I even posted them.

2) Malcolm had concerns about white America, not whites as a whole of whom most of you involved in this “natural hair movement” have issues with. (Not to mention the issues you have with light-skinned, blacks, biracial blacks, blacks with curly or wavy hair, etc.)

Reading is fundamental. Perhaps you could do some after taking your own seat.

Finn
Finn
6 years ago
Reply to  Susie

Susie. Lol 1.) I’m speaking specifically on my “sincere whites” quote when I bring up Post-Mecca. Which you conveniently paid no attention to out of all the quotes posted. 2.) If you paid any attention to the arguments posted about African American History, you would understand that the issue many of “us” have is indeed White America (Corporate America, Institutionalized Racism, Mainstream Media, The Prison Industrial Complex, etc.). Those institutions of white America are the cause of the Natural Hair Movement, along with many other Pro-Black Initiatives. It’s also been discussed to death that the light-skinned/black/biracials/“good hair” issues within the… Read more »

Btamela
Btamela
6 years ago
Reply to  Finn

Well said Finn.

Susie-Why are you on this blog? It’s obvious it does nothing for you but foster contempt which seems to be the typical reaction when any white person does not make the attempt to truly, sincerely understand the motive and need behind such a site. How disappoiting.
Go far away.
Have several seats. Not only good day but good night as well.

hala
hala
6 years ago
Reply to  Susie

Susie you should read the black woman cross-culturally. It covers the institution of racial oppression caused by colonialism and slavery throughout the African diaspora.

Michelle F.
Michelle F.
6 years ago

Thank you for your input Ali, it was greatly appreciated.

Carolyn
Carolyn
6 years ago

Ali,
Thank you for being so open and willing to learn.

Tisha
Tisha
6 years ago

(Sighhhhh) Why are we Blaming the White People for this problem?? Who started Curly Nikki? Who is charge of what get’s Posted? Maybe I’m wrong But I thought it was BLACK WOMEN!! There is the PROBLEM! It doesn’t matter how many white people agree and support us if WE are DIVIDED!! And how did we get here in the first place?? NO I mean America? White slave traders? But with WHOSE HELP?? Other AFRICAN’S!! And the division Still exists. The reason White women have a chance to come in is because WE have left the DOOR open by fighting among… Read more »

Brande
Brande
6 years ago
Reply to  Tisha

Let the church say amen!!!!!

DeDe
DeDe
6 years ago

I will never understand why we as black women/people can be responsible for creating so much YET kill ourselves giving it all away. I. DO. NOT. UNDERSTAND. BGHL why? I could not care less about this white woman’s hair story! I already know it. It’s been shoved down my throat all of my life. Media can no longer pretend that we do not exist and that we’re not freaking amazing! See youtube, pinterest, FaceBook etc. These outlets are loaded with beautiful images of BLACK women. How convenient is it that this natural hair movement is thriving and we finally have… Read more »

Twinkle
Twinkle
6 years ago
Reply to  DeDe

I know what you’re saying but we can’t stop people from visiting our beloved sites or shelves for that matter..but yes we should keep it for us only! Because we FINALLY have our hair to ourselves for once.

Twinkle
Twinkle
6 years ago

I think BGLH can help a lot of curlies..no matter the race..because curly women have a whole other set of hair rules to live by!!The world caters to straight hair so I understand exactly why this woman visits the site!

Blessang
6 years ago

I’m from the UK and I have heard Ali’s story time and time again. White women with frizzy curly hair are not underrepresented I don’t need to hear it again on a BGLH. White girls and women with frizzy hair are characters in books, movies, TV shows. I come here because NO WHERE ELSE was representing me as a black young woman with natural hair. The natural Afro hair movement is for natural Afro hair. So Ali — although I understand you went through stuff. It is not right to make equal comparisons. There is NO EQUITY, the way I… Read more »

Tiff
Tiff
6 years ago
Reply to  Blessang

Yeah. Too bad she wasn’t making equal comparisons…but okay. Tina was merely answering the questions asked, okay Ike?? #Defense #Re-Read

Maeve
Maeve
6 years ago

I landed on your site after clicking on a pin on pinterest about oil treatments. After getting here, I clicked around here and there and ended up on this article, not really knowing what was going on–but kind of got the gist after reading the article and a few comments. I am a white woman who found some useful info on this site, yes, but I fully acknowledge that I have zero understanding of your hair or the plights you have faced regarding your hair–and I wouldn’t presume to either. One of the questions asked to Ali “When you log… Read more »

Ms LiLi
Ms LiLi
6 years ago

I mean no offense but why do we care so much about the white opinion when it comes to our hair or hair experience period. The point of going natural for me was so that i could learn about MY hair independent of the main stream opinion and input.enough already

MsBeautiiB
MsBeautiiB
6 years ago

She wasn’t making comparisons. Some of you are so defensive and ready to attack that you aren’t realizing that Ali is simply saying she is not coming to this site looking to have a section cut out for white women with curly hair. She understands that this is a safe haven for black women but that does not change the fact that it is still very informative to any race. How can we improve race on race relations if we have an issue with white women simply coming on to learn. Not every white woman is aware of the complete… Read more »

DeDe
DeDe
6 years ago

I understand your point. I don’t care who visits the site. All are free to do so. My issue here is that we have a site like this for naturals and it feels as if BGLH is asking white women if they are okay with not being “included” here or asking for permission. I’m sorry but I don’t care about her hair story. I do not need hear it. I don’t come to BGLH to read hair stories of the Ali’s of the world and I don’t need Ali’s stamp of approval to be okay with coming to this site… Read more »

Queen
Queen
3 years ago
Reply to  DeDe

I think the point was to show proof that not everyone feels that it’s reverse racism or that its a problem for white people not to be included. I definitely dont think she was asking for anyones permission, obviously, since she’s continued writing her blog regardless of how others felt about it. I will also add respectfully that if you didnt care about her hair story you didn’t have to read it. There are others who may have been interested and that’s who the questions were for. One who truly cares about any story cares to know both sides of… Read more »

Jerri
Jerri
6 years ago

Im guessing alot of you have no idea why she was asked in the first place?!?!? Another natural haircare site that caters to black women(so to speak, similar to BLGH) came under fire recently due to them featuring a white curly. The questions they asked which were designed for black women who either transitioned or big chopped, seemed inappropriate to this women whose hair struggle composed of wearing her hair in buns and braid (not chemical relaxing, hot combs or wearing hair weaves like most of us can relate too) There were disagreements as to whether her feature had a… Read more »

bnh
bnh
6 years ago
Reply to  Jerri

My hair struggle also comprised of wearing buns and braids. I am biracial, and my white mom had NO IDEA what she was doing with my hair. I went to a school where EYERYONE else was white, and the teasing from my peers was bad enough for me (a 3c/3b, so slightly more similar to my mom’s hair type), but was much worse for my sisters, as they have 4c hair and she was completely out of her element, meaning their hair always looked messy and badly taken care of. (Don’t get me wrong, 4c hair is lovely. It’s just… Read more »

Jessica
Jessica
6 years ago

When I read articles like this, I’m really thinking, “it’s just hair”. Then you have the people who jump down your throat, “Your hair is a symbol of your oppression after the rape of your motherland etc etc” I just came on here to learn to accept, take care of, and love my hair, not include or exclude a group of people because their hair isn’t “afro-textured” like mine… I don’t think exclusivity has ever been a good thing, but I guess we (as in the world) will always have that because we’ll always find another place to divide ourselves.

Good-digger
Good-digger
5 years ago
Reply to  Jessica

Exclusive hair type = Exclusive website

ElleBella2011
ElleBella2011
6 years ago

Why is it that when black people have a conversation with other black people it is considered racist? When I look at the TV and there is nothing but white people I just blink. Is this the fifties i.e. Leave It To Beaver as a frame of reference. I don’t understand why non-blacks for lack of a better word are always trolling for info on black women but won’t even say “hello”. Yes that is a stretch. Let’s start the relationship with Respect and then you will have a foundation. Inspecting our hair and the dissecting processes are NOT the… Read more »

ladylanita
ladylanita
6 years ago

Conversations like these are a needless distraction from what is otherwise a positive movement and I would encourage my sista’s not to allow yourself to become engulfed by these arguments. It seems as if people enjoy seeing you riled up as opposed to happy, celebratory, and at peace focusing on yourself for a change. Point blank! This isn’t Stormfront! No one is going to stop any ethnicity from visiting this web page. If anyone finds usefulness in the information then more power to them! Having stated that, this is not merely a place to discuss having a bad hair day… Read more »

Lynda
Lynda
5 years ago
Reply to  ladylanita

FYI J Lo is Latina not white…

Good-digger
Good-digger
5 years ago
Reply to  Lynda

FYI J Lo’s look does not represent the Afro-Latina look, actually her look is closer to white (just ask all the white girls who worship her look and try to achieve it with self tanner and blonde highlights) so her point is still valid.

Lee
Lee
6 years ago

Some of the people who have commented are taking things too far. First of all I get it, I’m black, I wear my hair naturally, I have kinks and curls and bad hair days like everyone else but guess what… So does Ali. This is not a matter of territory this is a matter of education and community. Read any of the above article and you’ll see for yourself Ali is not expecting to be included, she’s not asking to be included, in fact she very much realizes that the community that is presented here is not one that caters… Read more »

ladylanita
ladylanita
6 years ago
Reply to  Lee

I hear you Lee. I really do! But in your quest to be so benevolent and inclusive think about this. Mahatma Gandhi received international support when he fought against British oppression. But there came a day when he said the support needs to stop from here, because Indians need to be able to do some things for themselves. Relating it to the relevance of this site, it is all well and good for people to enjoy the information that is available here. But there is an undeniable bias that exist against black women and beauty in this country, which site’s… Read more »

Lisa
Lisa
6 years ago

Can’t we all just get along?

Annette Tolbert
Annette Tolbert
6 years ago

thank you Ali, very well said.

Guyana Masala
6 years ago

I don’t think that the point of journalistic integrity has been addressed in regards to BGLH. Key things to note: it’s a digital media forum, it presents media & current interest topics through writing & photos, & it allows commentary. This means that to stick to its roots as a journalism entity it should pose intriguing & thought-provoking pieces about the main subject matter it surrounds. I commend the editors here for getting this view & addressing the discussion openly. I also commend the bravery of the person who spoke up. Now everyone else stop making this more than the… Read more »

Aliyah Morrison
Aliyah Morrison
5 years ago

Thank you finally a white woman understands her priviledge that she and many curly hair white woman have many sites and products dedicated to them and that this site is dedicated to us but they are welcome to read and learn . Thanks for sharing your story . Natural hair community is dedicated to us blacks and mixed woman thank you .

monniej
monniej
5 years ago

really, really good article! i know this is just one person from a much larger community, but i’ve often wondered who many of the topics about hair and beauty that are important to black women are viewed by other women. when i read “Nobody would be fighting this hard if it were *just* about hair.” i knew Ali and many, many women of color were definitely on the same page. thank you for sharing!

Anon4obvreason
Anon4obvreason
4 years ago

I am very late.. and maybe I am precisely who should NOT be giving their opinion (as another white curly) BUT I just wanted to say I love this blog, love the articles, and its nice to see a point of view not often found in magazines or more mainstream beauty blogs. I have learned a lot from you guys. Thabkyou.

christinanolanXD
christinanolanXD
4 years ago

aw ty

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