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Are you ever afraid of your curves?

Avatar • May 11, 2011

Reader Jessica (not pictured above) says;

This is kind of off-topic of hair, but I would be grateful if you could bring it to your readers. First off, let me say that I am FULLY AWARE that not all black women have big booties. We come in all different shapes and sizes. And that’s a beautiful thing!

I, however, am very curvy. I have Double D cups (I swear, at the rate these things are going, I’m going to need a breast lift by 30!) and what my mama calls a “basketball” or “bubble” booty. And I am only 5 foot 2! Growing up I wasn’t super curvy. But once I hit college (a majority white college at that) I suddenly ‘curved up’ and felt like a FREAK! I just felt like my body was ‘all over the place’ with so many jiggling, moving parts! What made it worse is that I wanted the svelte, long-legged, flat-chested look that so many of my college mates had. It seemed so effortless. You throw on a sun dress and lay out in the sun on the quad (btw, most sundresses have thin straps, which is a no-go for me because I need industrial strength, thick-strapped bras that you typically find in the back of the lingerie section of the department store, WAAAY past the cutesy lace and satin things, back with the ugly lingerie that only comes in beige, black or blinding white).

My whole college experience was a fashion FAIL consisting of me trying to fit into flimsy, cute garments and looking a HOTT mess (I once was so desperate to wear a spaghetti strapped dress to a banquet that I, unwisely, nixed my bra. I ended up having to wear my coat over my dress the entire night to spare both myself and the banquet attendees the embarrassment).

I went natural shortly after college, and it was such a freeing experience learning to love my hair… but I feel like that hasn’t quite transferred to my body yet. I still feel awkward walking down the street. I still feel like my body is ‘all over the place’. I know that you often hear of black women reveling in their curves… but some of us have a hard time adjusting to them. Particularly when you live and work (as I do) in areas that are majority non-black.

Even on fashion blogs, it’s been hard to find fashion icons who are both top AND bottom heavy and unashamed. The best I’ve been able to find thus far are Amber Rose and Kim Kardashian. But, my question for your readers would be, can anyone relate to this?! Are you ever afraid or ashamed of your curves?!

(Oh, and can I add that being curvy isn’t as glamorous as people think! There is always something popping out or riding up! Oh, and I also wanted to add that I’m not plus-size. I’m a size 4, just with wildly protruding parts :/ )

Interesting! Ladies, what are your thoughts?!

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Electric Feel
Electric Feel
9 years ago

I wish I had your problem! I have extremely “modest” curves, lemme stop their non-existing,SMDH. I would love a bubble butt any day.

I am sure you will grow to lover your body as time moves by.

MissyD
MissyD
9 years ago

To be honest, you should always be happy with what you have. Looking up to people like Amber Rose and Kim Kardashian for anything is not a wise choice. There are women who would love to have a curves and who have quite literally ruined or ended their lives in the quest to have get those curves (back alley plastic surgery). So when I hear a woman complain about her curves, it’s just nonsense. We have gotten to a point in society where our men are saying things like “Oh White girls got ass now”. Therefore a Black Woman with… Read more »

Jessica
Jessica
9 years ago
Reply to  MissyD

Well, I’m 25 and I definitely don’t look up to Amber Rose and Kim Kardashian for anything BUT fashion advice, because honestly I haven’t found anyone else. A lot of black celebs are bottom heavy, but not top heavy as well. Even J‑Lo and Beyonce are relatively small-chested. Amber and Kim are the best I’ve found in terms of women who are heavy on the bottom and the top. It really is hard to figure styles and fashions for that shape. I usually take what they do and make it a little more modest to try to work it to… Read more »

Tara Melissa
Tara Melissa
9 years ago
Reply to  MissyD

Way harsh, Tai. (I hope someone gets that.) There are many people who have less than stellar feelings about features that people would (literally) die to have. It’s not as simple as “get some self-esteem or move” in my opinion. She shouldn’t feel bad because she happens to be self-conscious. But I think that learning to appreciate what you have IS important. Hollywood isn’t the place to go in search of body diversity, but that’s what the internet is for! 🙂 I am not a huge fashion blog reader, but I’m sure there are plenty of women of all shapes and… Read more »

PixieLover
PixieLover
9 years ago
Reply to  Tara Melissa

I totally saw Cher as I read that… someone got it 😉

Mom2KurlyT
9 years ago
Reply to  Tara Melissa

I loved clueless. RIP Brittany Murphy…

Qalil Little
9 years ago
Reply to  Tara Melissa

I agree. You can’t just “get some self esteem”. I’m not even sure how that is done.

BajanPrincess82
BajanPrincess82
9 years ago
Reply to  Tara Melissa

I got that too. Even read it in her voice! lol

MissyD
MissyD
9 years ago
Reply to  Tara Melissa

I’m not the type to just give someone a pat on the back and say “it’ll be ok”. Sometimes you just have to man up and move on. Why complain? Either do something about it or don’t. It’s just that simple. We all go through body issues throughout our lives. What are you going to do, just be uncomfortable with yourself for the rest of your life? I think another young lady on here said that she can’t relate due to the fact that she has been battling a weight problem her entire life. We all go through struggles, but… Read more »

Laurie
Laurie
9 years ago
Reply to  MissyD

So basically what you’re saying is, ”Love and appreciate the curvy/voluptuous body you have because there are slim/skinny womens out there who would love to have more curves”??? I don’t think that’s something to tell someone with body issues. The person shouldn’t have to live and go on with life by constantly having to remind herself that other ”chicks” would want to have her body. That’s not confidence, but raher low self-esteem.

Lady Jaye
Lady Jaye
9 years ago

I am not top-and-bottom-heavy, but I am extremely bottom heavy, and only 5 feet (even less on a bad day 🙂 ) And it jiggles when i walk. I used to be so self conscious because people always remarked on how my butt would look “normal” on a much taller person but looked huge on me. Ever since I was a child people have commented. But whatever. It’s what God gave me and it took me making a decision to enjoy my body the way it is to let go of being so self conscious about it. I am still conscious… Read more »

Jessica
Jessica
9 years ago
Reply to  Lady Jaye

Go girl! I’m still trying to learn that confidence!

dre
dre
9 years ago

I can understand the frustration. I don’t have a real big booty or nothing, but my chest is big for my body size. I’m a D cup and the rest of my body is rather slim. Plus I have wide hips. In other words, I don’t feel like my body is proportionate. Shopping for shirts is not fun. I can’t wear the cutesy bras and tops. Like the reader stated above, I get very self conscious about how my boobs look when I’m at work and other places. I worry about looking “vulgar”. So I wear mostly loose flowy tops.… Read more »

Jessica
Jessica
9 years ago
Reply to  dre

Girl PREACH! I struggle with the whole “vulgar” issue as well. It’s like, do I dress dowdy? And downplay my clothes so everyone feels comfortable? Or do I dress nicely, but have my tits and bits jiggling all over the place.

I feel like I haven’t come to a firm decision on this issue and I really go back and forth. But at age 25 (and MARRIED to boot!) I feel like I need to mature on this issue and decide what it’s gonna be!

CurlyInTheA
9 years ago
Reply to  Jessica

:)Hate to sound like an old woman at 36, but let me tell you: Enjoy your shape, whatever God has blessed you with, while you are young enough to enjoy it. I’m 5’1 and have always been top heavy; I’ve grown into the “booty” as I’ve gotten older and it’s become pronounced than it was even 5 years ago. I can def understand the “vulgar’ thing. I can remember wearing move sumthin’ dresses in the early 90s. This was the first time I ever showed off the “girls” (I was 17/18) at an outdoor festival. I got groped! Wore a… Read more »

emma
emma
9 years ago

Maybe the problem is that your body changed at an odd time. Most women know what their bodies are by the time they finish high school yet yours changed after that. I think you just have to get used to the new you. Perhaps a dance class or yoga will help you gain better control of your new “parts” and enjoy them 🙂

TC
TC
9 years ago

I can totally relate. I am a little shorter than you are. I entered college weighing somewhere around 90 pounds with a B‑cup. I remember gaining that infamous freshman 15, which brought me to 105 pounds. I thought I was SO fly!!! I finally had more of a butt and hips, but I remained happily a B‑cup. THEN…I graduated and put on a few pounds here and there…all in my chest! I was a size 4 in a 34‑D bra and I hated it! I’m 35 and married with 2 kids now. During and after pregnancy, my breasts and hips… Read more »

Jessica
Jessica
9 years ago
Reply to  TC

Girl, YES!!! You are speaking my language!!! It is really hard because depending on what I wear, if it’s not tailored enough, the protrusion of my breasts make me look like I have a gut/wide middle. And there aren’t many tops that have room in the bust, then slim down in the waist. And it is true that large-chested girls look heavier than flat-chested girls, even if they are the same size!! It also distorts the scale. I weigh 139, which is towards the top of my weight bracket for my height, but most of that is breast & booty weight!!… Read more »

crimsonpeach
crimsonpeach
9 years ago

Embrace it! I too am built like this. And I always feel so feminine. I learned how to dress for my body type. I’m not a fashionista though. This can be hard for the summer but my easy rule is “if the ta tas are out the bottom is conservative and vice versa”.

I feel you on the clothes riding up. Finding pants that don’t ride down when I sit is a challenge. Lol

Jessica
Jessica
9 years ago
Reply to  crimsonpeach

LOL! Girl YAS! The riding up is a CHALLENGE. A lot of times my dresses will be 1.5 inches higher in the back than in the front because they ride up on my booty!!

I have actually begun to realize that I need to invest in a tailor. Wearing clothes right off the rack just ain’t working for me 🙁

Lexi
Lexi
9 years ago

Lemme tell you, I know what you mean! With the weather warming up quite quickly, I’m suddenly reminded about how much I “didn’t loose” or the things I “wish I could wear.” I’m also quite.…shapely. Double D’s, small waist, with a butt that so many joke about being able to sit a plate on. I’m not one to wear my arms out.…nor my legs, i pretty much do a 3/4 sleeve and capi pants that don’t reveal my calves too much.…piano legs i think they call em’ SO what does that make me? Hot as all get out because I… Read more »

Steph
Steph
9 years ago

Oh how I feel your pain with the strapless dresses. I told my bf the other day I wished my breast were smaller. He looked at me crazy of course but I explained to him how the summer outfits and my breast don’t go. I am top and bottom heavy. You’re right not many women are blessed with both. Most have one or the other. I just take it for what it is. I’m still learning to love my body. I think it just takes time to learn what works for you just like everything else. I wear a ton… Read more »

Olivia
9 years ago

I am mainly top heavy but there is some bottom curve there too. Dressing is really hard but for inspiration and even shopping sometimes, I head into plus sized catalogues. You can get ideas from them and try to imitate what you like. I don’t really play with anything spaghetti strappy or strapless unless it’s a wedding and I know that I will be fully covered. I hope this help.

Be happy with what you have, someone envies and wants to be you 🙂 The grass is never really greener on the other side.

b.
b.
9 years ago

I really like what Lexi and emma said! Getting into something like yoga or belly dancing to center the mind and body together might be a good boost. I am somewhat bottom-heavy and am growing up top (I’m 31). I “blossomed” right after college so I semi-identify. Thanks for bringing up this issue. What is cutesy or currently in style rarely works for the majority of the population. You may be able to take fashion cues from other cultures around the world. I’m not saying dress exactly like this or that people group but research and take notice of the things women… Read more »

Stacey
Stacey
9 years ago

I was a tiny kid and an athletic teenager. I was a petite college student because of the 4 mile runs we did on my cheerleading squad. However, I went to an HBCU and thought it might sound stereotypical, the girls with the well placed jiggle got the most play. I guess I differ from the author in this way, though I feel your pain about wanting to wear spaghetti straps. Can you believe I used to squeeze my D cups into tube tops? Tragic. My schoolmates were always trying to gain to get that video girl booty so their… Read more »

eSPy
eSPy
9 years ago

I understand what you are saying. But you reiterate it is all mental. I have been very slim all my life about 110 lbs (at the MOST) and ALMOST 5′5″. Now I weight about 135 simply from working out in the gym (took me about a yr to gain this weight) Im ALL muscle now! But I like the way I look. Before, according to society I was TOO SMALL to be a black woman. I am still thin but muscular. (also being a past track and field runner, I am more used to having muscles;-) My point here is…if… Read more »

Michele
Michele
9 years ago

For cute bras in all different sizes you should try Intimacy. Life changer…I fell in love with my girls all over again. The bras are so pretty!!

Ashia
Ashia
9 years ago
Reply to  Michele

Also try Lane Bryant. I am 5’3 and a 38 DDD. They have cute bras at reasonable prices.

Moni
Moni
9 years ago

My curves are more Beyonce than Kim K, but I have been roughly the same size/shape since I was around 12. Other than a period in my teens when I thought I was “fat”, I have loved my body ever since. One of the things that helped me love my body is to embrace what it can wear instead of moaning about what it can’t. So I can’t wear a shift dress? I’ll rock the hell out of that a‑line dress instead. Focus on the beauty of your body as it is, not on what you’d like it to be.… Read more »

AnonCA
AnonCA
9 years ago
Reply to  Moni

Um, not all of the women that you’ve listed are “genetically” blessed as you’d called them. Google some photos from their early careers and you’ll see that they got the help of a surgeon’s knife. I just think that if you are going to compare your parts to someone else’s you should be aware of what is real and what is injected or silicon, b/c your natural heavy breasts will not sit up high like fake ones. It’s probably better just not to compare yourself too much to anyone and to work with what you have and learn how to dress… Read more »

Jessica
Jessica
9 years ago

I am reading all the comments and so overwhelmed by the support and kind words!

And to the people who are basically saying shut up and be grateful… please stop oversimplifying this. I don’t gain my confidence from looking at other women and imagining that they want to look like me :/ That doesn’t make sense to me and I don’t think it’s healthy.

I need to be comfortable with how I look, and the only person I’m concerned with is myself.

Queeen
Queeen
9 years ago

Honestly, I can relate (somewhat) to this post. I am curvy and have some body image issues. Despite that I’ve been told I am proportioned, I feel like my breast are not big enough for my frame and my stomach is too big for my waist… so on and so forth. I grew up in the south were my shape (more so by black men) is celebrated but moving to a predominately white area has made me more self conscious than I was before. We live in an era where everyone is trying to drop pounds, a little extra even… Read more »

am
am
9 years ago

serena williams is curvy, muscular and athletic. she was recently seen in a bikini, curves and all.

PS — I dont understand why we get stuck on the number for our size; if you’re that curvy it’s hard to be a sz 4. I always buy to fit my biggest asset and thats what i tell any female. its the only way clothes will look good on; of course then you’ll have to tailor but its worth it.

SamaTHA
SamaTHA
9 years ago

Hey darling, I totally understand where you are coming from. I actually have always had a curvy body ever since I was in the 8th grade. The thing about that is older men would come and talk to me and to be honest being a 14-year old girl it was kind of scary. When I wore certain outfits the boys seemed to go crazy. This overall made me self conscious about my body and what I wore. I am still like afraid to wear anything because of how people may respond. I wear what looks best on my body not… Read more »

Sandra
Sandra
9 years ago

Lol believe or not i went through middle school and high school having the opposite problems. I spent years wondering how the shape being celebrated by black men and women alike, and envied by others had skipped me entirely. Wondering when i would blossom and fill out all my clothes,sadly it did not happened until my junior year of high school and out of nowhere “woop there it was lol. I remember buying all these cute clothes that all my friends were wearing and could not fit for the life of me. Growing up in a predominantly white area made… Read more »

chiqport
chiqport
9 years ago

Wow! I had a flashback of myself. I’m 5′1″ on a good day. C cup and a round bottom. Ever since I was little people always made it a point to tell me I had a big butt (but at the time I had a small chest — barely A). No matter where I went shopping I always had to try on my pants because they wouldn’t fit right — and when I did find a pair to ‘fit’ they’d be too big in the waist but fit everywhere else. College is when I started growing fully into my body.… Read more »

NinaG
NinaG
9 years ago

I’m not thick, but I do have a butt and I am very self-conscious walking down the street when men are present…I always try to make my hips stiff so they aren’t swaying. Lately I’ve been working on not doing this…

phd
phd
9 years ago

I think the curvy life is totally glamorous and I love lingerie shopping! I’m 5’5 and really curvy all-over (34E, small waist, full hips-butt-thighs), but it took me YEARS that out. I though it was just about my weight, but NOPE, I’m shapely and going up a size doesn’t always solve the problem. Getting fitted for a bra @ a lingerie shop w/ a good selection of sizes was probably my first step in the right direction. I don’t settle for ugly bras and love the way I look in my clothes. I love the Little Flirt boutique in NYC… Read more »

CurlyInTheA
9 years ago
Reply to  phd

These are some really good tips! Love empire dresses. Also, love wrap dresses. They are truly a Godsend for just about every woman’s shape. Just throw on a cami underneath so that too much of the girls aren’t out and you’re done. I’m a dress girl, especially if the material is stretchy. They’re quick, easy and for the most part, figure flattering. Jumpsuits are also good — and they are so on trend!

b.
b.
9 years ago
Reply to  phd

THIS! Thank you. 😀

Kandi
Kandi
9 years ago

A lot of the commenters keep trying to tell Jessica what she “should” do and how she “should” learn to feel about her curves. I don’t think she is unaware that the healthiest thing to do is love whatever body type one has, nor do I think she is unaware that she can work out and tone up certain parts of her body and find flattering clothing. What she was looking for, in my humble opinion, is kindred spirits who have similar struggles. Advice on how to deal with her issue is helpful(though she didn’t request it) if given in… Read more »

indigo.m
indigo.m
9 years ago

Imma be real, as a black girl was no ass, I wish I had curves to “hate”. Folk just need to be thankful for what they have.

AnonCA
AnonCA
9 years ago
Reply to  indigo.m

I kind of agree…clearly, we all have our crosses to bear, but all of these people who are chiming in sound like they have totally lovely bodies, and that’s a problem that I wish that I had as well. Funny, I was always the only black girl and my classmates were tiny white girls but I always thought a nice hourglass with a round butt (and hopefully a large chest) was the way to go. While I definitely have a typical black shape, I have WAY too much of it, so I’d kill to have it in a much smaller version if… Read more »

honeybrown1976
honeybrown1976
9 years ago

I’m 34–26-39.5 and I’m barely hitting 5’2. So, I’m bottom-heavy, not top-heavy. I love my junk. My hubby loves my junk as well as “admirers” that I never asked for. I can’t relate. Sorry. I don’t have to apologize for what God wanted me to have naturally.

Renee Mc
Renee Mc
9 years ago

I am sometimes embarrassed of my body as well. I have a small chest, 32- 34A, which does not really bother me, but I hate my hips! They do not really protrude, but I would be alot smaller with out them.What makes it worse is that I feel that some ppl put to much emphasis on my hips, even when they try to compliment me. I love myself from the waist up, which I usually say. I’m still working on the bottom half. I am also 5ft 5in, and slender but at the end of the day, when I look… Read more »

anastasia
anastasia
9 years ago
Reply to  Renee Mc

Ladies, I think we all go through this at various points in our lives. But, just to share my two cents, I have no hips. That’s right- straight down! I remember when my menses started, each month I would check to see if the hips had spread just a little, but alas, it never happened. I am a size 4 pant and wear a size 10 or 12 blouse, blazer, or jacket. What makes it even worse, my waist is tiny, and at times too small to fit size 4. If I go down in pant/ jean size, then my… Read more »

babycoily
babycoily
9 years ago
Reply to  anastasia

yep. I’m hipless as well but I’m only 17. If I try to go down a size to fit my hips, my thighs wont cooperate ‑_- But skinny jeans totally create an illusion of hips sometimes.

anastasia
anastasia
9 years ago
Reply to  babycoily

@ babycoily-thanks!

Rachel
Rachel
9 years ago

I know how you feel, you are not ashamed but frustrated that you can’t wear the cute outfits that are out. I’m 5′7″ and have curvy hips, and am a C bordering on a D. My problem with curves is not the clothes, but the attention I receive from men. I am not a short skirt, over flowing cleavage kind of girl, but because of the way curvy women (Amber Rose, Kim Kardashian, Video models) portray themselves, I get unwanted attention from men. I stay in jeans, and loose t‑shirts to keep from having to deal with it.

binks
binks
9 years ago

LOL at I’ am going to need a breast lift by 30…girl I feel your pain let’s just say my cup runneth over a couple of times. But it goes to show you that the grass isn’t greener on the other side. I always had big butt and boobs since I hit puberty and always wished I had that long, lean tone body like Noami Campbell and for a long time I use to hide my body in oversize clothes. But over time my confidence starting building and instead of fixing on a body that I will NEVER have I… Read more »

LadyV69
LadyV69
9 years ago

I can and can’t relate. I’m not top heavy, but I am bottom heavy. It was more pronounced when I was overweight though. When I was heavier, I couldn’t wear suits because the tops would always fit but the bottoms never would fit. I had to always get separates. Now that I’m no longer plus size, it’s been easier. Also, I do squats and lunges to tone the butt. It’s still a good size, but more shapely. I was self-concious about my shape growing up because I was raised in a predominantly white area and that kind of shape is… Read more »

Mims
Mims
9 years ago

someone earlier mentioned salma hayek and I think she is a prime example of packing a lot of punch in a little package. Also maybe try clothing shapes that make you think of the 50’s as that was defo and era of the hour glass. Jersey is also a good fabric as long as you don’t go for anything too tight and wrap dresses are a Saviour for everyone. Also if your booty is really bothering flared skirts can always hide that. HTH

Moonchild
Moonchild
9 years ago

My suggestion: go to a large department store (Nordstrom, Macy’s, Bloomingdales) and have a personal shopper pick some clothes for you. These stores do this for free and you’re under no obligation to buy anything. Having an unbiased professional help you dress (I went in for work and fun clothes) changed how I viewed my shape because I actually learned what to avoid and what would flatter my curves. It changed the way I shopped completely (you can take her advice and head to your favorite stores!). Of course, changing the outside appearance is just one step in accepting yourself,… Read more »

J
J
9 years ago

Hey love. I know exactly how you feel. I was a pudgy kid until I curved out in the seventh grade. Yes, seventh grade. It was a living hell; I felt like a freak and I got so tired of the cat calls from the upper classmen that I wore baggy clothes that just made me look dumpy and depressed. In high school, I wore a uniform, but refused to wear skirts, opting for a too-big polo and baggy jeans. It wasn’t until college that I started accepting my curves and seeing that they were actually a blessing. Somehow, I ended… Read more »

Kami
9 years ago

Ok so let me say I just stalk this site like a job, lol. I never comment, I just want to know people’s opinions and whats going on in the black hair world. But this hits close to home. First get yourself measured and not by Victoria’s Secret, Aerie, or a Nordstrom specialist. They lie…I am really sorry, but I think their purpose is to sell you something not to make you feel good and find a great fitting bra. I used to be told I am a 36D. Then I went to a bra specialist. Go to this website… Read more »

nyemu
nyemu
9 years ago
Reply to  Kami

i can kinda feel your pain! was always top-heavy (got a lil something on the bottom too and some hips) but i walked into lane bryant recently to get fitted for a bra and they were excellent! so, it gives finding a bra in the US some hope, lol. girl, i was at a 38H, which blew my mind (i thought i was a double D or something), but my clothes fit SO much better now! and i’m a shortie (between 5′1″ and 5′3″). now…no more doubling up on bras to minimize jiggle, no more crazy jiggling, and it gives… Read more »

yoli
9 years ago

I am 5′5″-5′6″, 155 lbs and my measurements are 35–30-42. yep, 35–30-42. My hips stop my body from being “average”–I don’t have a particularly big butt, my breasts are a 34C, but my hips and thighs…oh my! I am very self-conscious about it because even though I’ve been working out and lost 32 lbs, my hips are still so wide and it feels like my pants size will never get below a 10. I am flabby and afraid to wear a swimming suit, I just want to be normal. I feel like my body won’t look halfway “normal” until I… Read more »

Kitty
9 years ago

I can kind of relate, at least with the booty part. I would be a thinner size 14 instead of the almost 16 that my butt creates. Finding pants that fit is a nightmare! Low rise everything in stores nowadays is so frustrating! >:[ Not only that, pants that fit in the back but sag in the front- UGH! I have a hard time finding shirts too because I have big manly (sort of lol) shoulders and arms. I need to get into bodybuilding rofl! I will find a cute shirt, but the shoulder/sleeves will be too narrow. Or I will… Read more »

Kitty
9 years ago
Reply to  Kitty

BTW. I’m 5′ 5″ and 27. So yep. XD

me
me
9 years ago

If most had a choice between being top heavy or hip heavy or “shoulder heavy” (with barely any hips), they wouldn’t want to be “shoulder heavy” like I am…blegh…At least wide hips and boobs can be seen as feminine when the person is comfortably showing them but when are wide shoulders seen as feminine, alluring or appeasing?

Kitty
9 years ago
Reply to  me

Girl I feel you! I can wear my man’s shirts! ROFL My shoulders are almost as broad as his! XD

anastasia
anastasia
9 years ago
Reply to  Kitty

+1 …Massive shoulders, big back, and very long arms! I look very athletic, like I’ve been lifting and running while in the womb, LOL! A perfect triangle with big breasts-smh 🙂 What amazing and diverse creations we all are!
Peace and blessings sisters!

Morgan
Morgan
9 years ago

I can really relate to this. I’m mostly bottom heavy, it took me 20 years to get into a B‑cup, lol, but i digress. Since I graduated high school, it’s like i’ve sprouted hips from no where. I often feel disproportionate, since my top is small, & my bottom is wide. it just feels weird, & i’m also tall (5’9 at 174 pounds), so if I wear heels, i’m SUPER tall, like an amazon. Being bottom heavy is irritating too because of the attention, but i’m not the biggest fan of my body. these last few months have been me… Read more »

Alana
Alana
9 years ago

THIS! Now that I’m loving my natural hair I wanna love my body too. but these massive boobs are such a hassle. Since there’s so many people on here with the same issue, anybody know where I can by a bathing suit top for a 32DD? lol

binks
binks
9 years ago
Reply to  Alana

Don’t know if I’ am suppose to do this. But fashionbombdaily.com just did a great post on swimsuits for curvy women and they were cute. Check it out figleaves.com for more selections as well

http://fashionbombdaily.com/2011/05/10/curvy-swimsuit-special-5-brands-for-voluptuous-vixens/

Rae
Rae
9 years ago
Reply to  Alana

Lane bryant or her room (www.herroom.com)

Rhonda
Rhonda
9 years ago

You are not alone here Jessica. I am 31 years of age, 5’2 tall, and I am a triple D, imagine that. Strapless anything has always been out of the question and yes, I know all about the ugly,huge, thick bra strap situation. I do also have the very round somewhat huge curvy bottom. Dont get me wrong I love myself, but I am going to get a breast reduction in the near future. This is a decision that I made because of the back and shoulder problems that I experience on a daily basis. ove yourself, but do what… Read more »

CreoleAphrodite
CreoleAphrodite
9 years ago

lol eh..i love my shape…probably bc i havent always had it..all through my teen years i was the black girl with the BIG boobs but flat butt! with wide hips..smh I went thru everything from..padding my pants (yes)..eating high carb foods…doing squats etc..to make my butt get bigger!..it was embarassing to me…my ex even told me he loved everything about me..except i had a pancake booty’..smh..fast forward to the last year and a half since Ive been married and BAM!…booty!!..my mom,sister,husband (of course),even friends noticed it..we had a fight party this weekend and all my female friends kept saying how big… Read more »

CreoleAphrodite
CreoleAphrodite
9 years ago

*them…

rosie
rosie
9 years ago

I don’t have your proportions (5′6″ and 140 lbs.) and I wish I weighed less. I have a small chest and I want to avoid looking pear shaped or bottom-heavy, and I really don’t like my ass sticking out of my work clothes. The sight makes me uncomfortable and I feel more confident with a leaner silhouette.

foxyr
foxyr
9 years ago

Wow! It’s hard to believe your a size 4 with all that junk in the trunk and in the hood! LOL!! Just kidding, girl! I’m pretty curvy and I’ve been curvy all of my life. Believe me, it’s harder to be curvy in your teens, because old men would try to hit on me all the time. That’s gross as hell! To this date, I cringe when older men look at me in a sexual way and I’m 33 years old! I guess my experience made me think almost every older man is a pervert. Luckily, I grew up around… Read more »

Starla
Starla
9 years ago

Nope, i am never afraid because I am not curvy..I am small on the top and the bottom so it’s never been an issue. I don;t know if that will change after giving birth but for now, I’m cool with what I have.

Rae
Rae
9 years ago

i can relate i’m 5’1, size 6, 36 DD & curvy. I grew up in around mostly white people, and all my white friends were slim w/not much shape and when i was younger all i wanted to do was fit in. I was so self conscious and i always felt “fat.” It wasn’t until i got to college that i really started to embrace myself for who i am. Being curvy isn’t as glamorous as TV makes it out to be. Being short & curvy is exxxxxtra hard because nothing fits right. A small/medium may fit my body, but… Read more »

Carla
Carla
9 years ago

I always felt that way one way another in my adult life. I was overweight in my early 20’s with a very unattractive apple shape — wish I had your problem! Now that I lost the fat/weight several years ago and started weight training, the numbers on the scale get me down. I’m 5′6″ and weigh 167 lbs but with a large frame, large bones and solid muscle and wear a size 6. Some people think its a win-win because I also have a D cup breasts and hourglass figure, but those numbers on the scale are unnerving to the… Read more »

Jessica
Jessica
9 years ago

Hey guys, It’s Jessica (OP) here. I was responding to comments initially but stopped because so many started rolling in. Seriously I started taking NOTES on a lot of your advice. It means a lot to me that you guys would be so gracious in understanding where I’m coming from and offering advice. One of the reasons I love BGLH is that the community here is so great! Thank you ladies. It means so much! This made my day yesterday!

And I’m loving my curves a little bit more today 😉

Kim
Kim
9 years ago

everyone here seems to be top heavy…DDD, seriously? yet another reason for me to be self conscious. =/ i am just barely filling out a 32B cup. I got robbed.

Moni
Moni
9 years ago
Reply to  Kim

Girl, enjoy it! No shade on those who are more blessed (b/c there are obvious advantages), but I enjoy my high B/low C ladies for all the reasons that they complain about theirs! I can easily find “pretty” bras, have no problem with spaghetti or strapless dresses, can wear low cut tops without looking “vulgar”, can workout without worrying about keeping the girls in place, don’t have to worry (as much) about sagging, and with the right bra can get major cleavage if that’s the look I’m going for. And let’s just say the menfolk haven’t had any complaints… I… Read more »

MISS KITA
MISS KITA
9 years ago

I would say to find what works best for your body type. Don’t try to fit in and wear what everyone else is wearing. If you are rocking the natural, then I believe that you should be able to rock and do whatever you would like. After I had my son, I gained some thickness in my butt. I love it, but I had to find what I felt comfortable and confident in. I don’t have the breast issue, but how you feel about your size does show to others, so just know that you are beautiful and although you… Read more »

Chitown Chica
Chitown Chica
9 years ago

Hi Jessica, I feel you it can definitely be hard to know what to wear to fit your body type and be feminine at the same time. I’m 5′2″ too but I’m a B cup with a small butt and I always wished for bigger breasts so I could have cleavage as opposed to the dreaded gap:) But I was thinking wearing belted dresses or belts over a top or a vest will help to accentuate your small waste while allowing you to wear shirts that keep the girls in check.

God Bless

Mims
Mims
9 years ago

I wish I was in the D category lol i’m way up in the big leagues try 32F! yes I said it 32F I think I’m a US 4 or 6 and sometimes I get self conscious about my boobs.I grew large boobs when I was about 13 it was like summer came and boom they were there! Then older guys got pretty pervy and I haven’t completely got over the uncomfortable feeling. Bra shopping is something I look forward to though, thankfully in the uk we have lots of brands for bustylicious ladies 😀 But I think of it this… Read more »

Porsche
Porsche
9 years ago

This is me all the way! I’m a D cup & my nickname is big booty judy lol. But I’ve learned to embrace it. I’ve just accepted the fact that there are certain tops & dresses I can’t wear even though I am petite. I still force myself into those daisy duke shorts though lol

Sophia
Sophia
9 years ago
Reply to  Porsche

I also have to say I’m with you. While I am not petite, I am short or at least feel like it at 5′ 5″. My bra size is 32 DD and most of the bras I have don’t even fit me correctly because I settle for 34 D and even have some 36 C’s #fail. I’m also known for my booty shorts, because longer/bermuda shorts just make me look like an oompa loompa.

My main tip is to wear clothing that accentuates the waist so that you don’t look large overall due to two certain bulging areas lol.

Rachel
Rachel
9 years ago

Hi Jessica- I know it’s an issue of “grass is always greener” but you have the kind of problem I only WISH I had.…I’m about 5’7, 127 lbs, a C cup on a good day, with arguably NO booty! Like seriously. Like, wear-tunics-alot-to-cover-the-droop-in-my-jeans no booty. Sad, but true. Try that as a black woman!
I say, rock what you got! I just look for the silver linings in all of it…you’re gorgeous no matter what and I bet that plenty of the women on your campus were totally envious of what God gave you. 🙂

Delightbunnie
Delightbunnie
9 years ago

What positive comments!

I’m personally a petite at 5″. I’m an B‑cup with a round butt that isn’t too big. My mom likes to call me “pancake butt” because I don’t have a butt as big as hers. XD

I can get insecure sometimes because my body type isn’t the ideal body type for a black woman. It more stereotypical Asian woman than anything else.

Not Super Curvy
Not Super Curvy
8 years ago
Reply to  Delightbunnie

Well count your blessings sweety, as most women who have these ‘super curvy’ figures are seen as sex objects and nothing more. They may be super smart, talented and great people but sadly in the end, men objectify them. I knew a girl once and she only wore boy clothes for that very reson. Everyone has a body they can work…trust me 🙂

CurlieGirlie
CurlieGirlie
9 years ago

Hahaha, I’m 5′7″ and 120lbs with tiny boobs and a tiny booty. When I was a kid, I had a big booty, but as a hit puberty, it just got smaller and smaller… 🙁

I do have wonderful hips, though! I like to show those curves off to the best of my ability. Love what you’ve got, honey! Someone else is probably uber jealous of your curves!

cygnet
cygnet
9 years ago

I’ve got junk in the trunk, the hood, and all over the chassis :-). I’m regularly working out five days a week and eating sensibly (slightly) more often than not to try to offload some of it. But based on my proportions, no matter what I’ve weighed, I know that at an ideal weight I will look like a string with three rather large, strategically-placed knots. My shoulders are narrow, but they’re fronted by a pretty impressive rack. My waist is proportionately tiny, then my hips flare out very wide, and thanks to a slight lordosis of the spine (the… Read more »

Naturalblackdiva
Naturalblackdiva
9 years ago

I understand where you are coming from. I am a DD and sometimes I will buy an E or F. I am a size 12, small waist and curvy butt. I was down that road when I was younger especially being the only girl in first grade with boobs. As a woman in her thirties I embrace my curves. I look in the mirror every day and appreciate what men look at and cannot touch. I love me! Now don’t get me wrong when I look in the mirror I think…if I get on the stairmaster I can tighten up… Read more »

blackchic ani
blackchic ani
9 years ago

girl be THANKFUL for those curves, i have what u think u envied — svelte, long legged flat chested look — i hate it — still do. how do u think i feel when everyone describes black women as “curvy” and i just DO NOT fit that equation. trust me like others have said, most ppl are probably watching u in envy..

Vicky
Vicky
9 years ago

I’m sorry I can’t relate. I’m battling a huge weight problem and have done so for years. I wish I had your problem.

janelle
janelle
9 years ago

Confused. You’re a size four with beautiful curves? I’m size 4 and I used to drink nutrament everyday, peanut punch whatever I could to put on size. Being in grad school, I lost more weight 🙁 you sound like my idea of perfect. I buy dresses with high necks to cover my collar bones and wear blazers to cover my skinny arms. I wish I had advice for you but I can’t see the problem. Maybe its bc I’m west indian.

bb
bb
9 years ago

As an hourglass I am very curvy as well. Though I have what is considered the ‘best’ body type for a female to have, the unwanted attention from others can things really uncomfortable. Like you I’ve had an issue with by bottom. In high school I wanted the model type body (a la Naomi Campbell) but instead became curvy and remained petite @ 5’ 4″. To make sure my butt doesn’t protrude more then necessary I always make sure to walk upright(least I look like flamingo from behind LOL).Standing proud has improved my self esteem and I say it makes… Read more »

Lindi
Lindi
9 years ago
Reply to  bb

I TOTALLY agree with the point you make about curvy body types attracting unwanted attention. I have a pretty average B/C‑cup bust but my thighs and behind are on another level (I’m an American size 4 — 8, depending on where I shop). Wearing shorts even in the middle of summer will literally get me followed by random men. Every so often I come to terms with the fact that I’m built like a video-girl but yes, my curves and the fact that that is *all* many people see when they look at me *do* scare me :/ I guess it’s a… Read more »

jazmin
jazmin
8 years ago
Reply to  Lindi

ugh i feel you on that! i am 4’11 with wide shoulders a b cup with a small waist nice hips full thighs but not super thick (secretly wish they were a lil bigger and my hips were a lil wider) and a butt i mean a BUTT lol nickname in high school was big booty judy or apple booty dudes found it funny to grab my butt randomly when i bent over or just make inappropriate rude comments while i am in love with my curves i sometimes hate the attention they get at times i wish i was… Read more »

Amber
9 years ago

I can relate I used to be ashamed of being curvy to the point where I even starved myself! Now I am a healthy size four with small breast, no hips, and a nice round butt. Sometimes I do feel fat but most of the time I love being petite and shapely. I too work at a predominantly non-black establishment where pins are worshiped. As long as you love yourself no one else matters!

Eve
Eve
9 years ago

I know this is a older topic, but I just wanted you to know that I can relate to you a ton. I’m a little taller than you(5′6″)but am also a size 4 with sizable curves (a full 34D and a big round butt)that both popped up on my body during my sr year at a predominately white college. Before then, my chest was a cup smaller and my butt was considered a “pancake” by my family. So I had to relearn how to dress my body and how to appreciate it bouncing bottom and all. This took a bit… Read more »

Kiana Franulic
9 years ago

I LOVE my curves. I am 5’8, with 34F chest, small waist, full hips and thighs with a bubble butt. I regularly pick up pillows when I get off the couch. I was the only girl in the sixth grade with hips and butt. LOL. I love my body.My hubby does too (whom, by the way, is white). I have gained a little weight since this phot due to my lack of exercising (I’m a full-time lawyer, LLM Student and wife!) but I have began working out again. I am lucky, I must admit, because even when I gain weight,… Read more »

Michelle
9 years ago

Unfortunately, my mother taught me to be ashamed of my curves at a very young age (my curves are from my dad’s side of the family). I began to develop in the 5th grade. At that point my mother would tell me that my butt was jiggly and she made me wear those shiny beige or black girdles with the diamond shaped “tummy control” stitch in the front.I was made to wear long shirts that covered my hips and butt. I too grew up in an non-black area (Orange County, California) surrounded by slim Caucasian women.Needless to say, I was… Read more »

Marva
Marva
9 years ago

I, too, can relate to your pain! I am 5’2 with a BIG BUTT, semi-size breasts and a thin waist. I am sometimes ashamed of my curves because they can’t fit into anything!! My clothes are always fit up top, saggy in the middle and snug in the rear. : / Growing up, my mom made me uncomfortable with my curves and often made me hide my figure! It was not until I reached college that I began to get a little more comfortable in my skin. As an African American woman, I think we feel like this because the only… Read more »

qahira
qahira
9 years ago

I do understand where you are coming from. I am top and bottom heavy and was throughout high school where i was very active and all of my schools were majority white. Actually, i always just felt bigger than everyone but when i went to college i actually really appreciated my shape. One thing that helps is wearing a bra that fits… they are usually 2 or 3 times more expensive than normal bras but well worth it. Try Nordstrom- I particularly like Elomi and Fantasie brands. They even offer strapless and multi-way bras. I am still an active person… Read more »

Mary
Mary
9 years ago

Consider yourself lucky. I WISH I had curves. I’m shaped like a darn rectangle. -.-’

custodie per violoncello

Hello, this is a great blog!

lynn
lynn
8 years ago

I can totally relate to this post. I have a coke bottle figure at 5ft 4in. My mother says I was born with these hips and this behind. I was athletic as a kid and so was in the best possible shape for my shape- svelte and muscular legs and abs. As I’ve gotten older things have changed a bit- my mature body is a little thicker than I am comfortable with all around- sure I could stand to loose a few pound but I am in no ways battling a weight problem or do I consider myself overweight. I… Read more »

Chae
Chae
8 years ago

I can so relate to this post! I’m 5′4″ with a huge butt and 38DD!!!! I hate shopping because it takes forever to find just one thing that fits right. I buy more shoes than clothes cause it’s easier find shoes!! I was born with the booty but the boobies did,t come til my junior year of college! To top it off I’m in between stores.….too big for the skinny people stores and too small for the plus size stores. It is literally a miracle for me to find clothes.…it’s usually an accident. Growing up I loved my curves, I… Read more »

nikki
nikki
7 years ago

i can relate to this post. i have annoying larger bust. *sigh* people automatically think that they can make unwanted comments about my body including vain family members.

Sindy
Sindy
7 years ago

I feel exactly the same way, only difference my chest is smaller making me badly proportioned.

I have always wanted the slim, “straight up and down” body with slender legs. Instead I have a big, wide, high bottom, thick arms and legs, with a small waist. My lower back seems to curve inwards. I have hidden in coats and long tops for many years, ashamed of my shape. Unable to wear straight dresses or skirts and always covering my bottom.

Meaghan
Meaghan
4 years ago

I am definitely on the curvy side if the spectrum. I personally love my curves because they make me fell feminine and I love being a woman. But I don’t like the attention they get me. I don’t like that my features are either sexualized or deemed excessive like I some how manipulated my DNA to look this way and want attention. And I don’t like being stared at. I also don’t feel the need to wear clothing that Makes everything more pronounced like Amber Rose and Kim West. If I’m wearing a dress that hugs my butt I definitely… Read more »

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